3rd bday is coming and I have issues... need help

[Rolsjo]

Party - As far as the party goes, just do what you had planned. It sounds great to me! My mom and your mom could be sisters. My mom likes to have everything done better, bigger and more elaborate than anyone else. She threw fits last year when by brother got married at a park and had a BBQ reception. But she was the only one. I would try and accommodate her on some little things, maybe some of the food, but go with what makes it easier on you.

Gifts - I assume that your family knows, or at least will know, of your plans to spend years traveling in the RV. I would include a line in the invitation explaining that because of limited space in the RV you would prefer gifts be made to a local children's hospital. Not everyone will do this. So you have two choices, either explain that extraneous gifts will be donated anyway or donate them after the party and don't tell anyone. Your daughter will be three and the excitement of the RV will supercede the toys she will be losing. Let your mom get her something, I agree that it's a grandma's right. Maybe you could think of something that is small that your daughter would just love. Offer suggestions to your mom, but also a word of warning that if it is too big it will be given away. Let her decide.

Mom - Several years ago we moved overseas and were just taking what could fit in our luggage. My son was just a couple months old and when everyone was buying baby gifts they knew to buy small things like clothes. Well, almost everyone. My mom insisted that my DS could not survive without a swing and some HUGE Little Tykes plastic trucks. Umm, really? Well, we gave them away and she was hurt. But I didn't even feel badly about it because we had told her it was going to happen. Your mom is an adult and she is more than capable of seeing the consequences of her actions if she wants to. If she doesn't see the need to scale down to move into an RV it is unlikely that you will able to convince her. Just try not to let her reactions bother you. It has taken me years, but my mom can still rile me up sometimes like no one else!

 

[Judy]

I would send written invitations stating that all gifts/donations will go to the children's hospital. Tell mom your decision is one gift from her, and stick to it. If Mom walks in with 6 gifts and hands them to your daughter, then tell daughter she gets to choose only one, and the rest go to the hospital, right there in front of your mother, and stick to that, too. Yes, your mother must respect your wishes, and will probably force you to enforce them. Several good lessons here for your daughter, too.

I would not have let the car bed in my house. That is excess, to you, and your feelings should have been honored. It is excess to me, too. She could have a nice little start for an adult/college fund by now if some of that money had been used more sensibly.

 

[SophieLain127]

Then I will be rehoming or donating all the gifts. I don't know how many times I can say this no parks it will be january. We are just having pizza it is $5 large pizza (cheese or pep). I'm going for no cook no prepare foods, veggie platter, fruit platter, crackers, cheese, chips and dip, pizza, drinks (water/juice/tea sweetened or un.


We are doing simple games like design your own goodie bag, treasure hunt, dancing, lucky ducks (a tub of ducks with colored dots on their bottoms, after kids pick a duck they then choose a goody out of the box that matches the color of the dot), A pin the tale type game.

Decorations are simple because the anime is a nature themed so we are doing a earthy colors and green themed stuff. With the main cake and some wall cutouts of totoro.

There are only going to be six kids older and 1 kid younger then Sophie so

Everything is fine food wise I'm happy with it all. Except for my mom's negative attitude with everything I do.

We are doing e-cards so I will be including a link for children's so people can see what type of donations are good. I will let those attending when they RSVP that if they wish to give sophie a gift instead of a donation they will need to get there early or stay later for one on one time with her. I understand that some will insist on gifts but this is a simple gathering for a birth celebration. Not a gift contest and not an overkill of gifts (my child gets bored and distracted after opening just 3 or 4 gifts so imagine how horrible and cranky she will be after opening 60!)

 

[CritterHill]

Ok, a couple suggestions.

- Rent a fire hall or Elks club (indoors since it will be January).

- Potluck

- Tell your Mom that you daughter is into baking (with your help of course) and art projects so if she wants to get lots of presents, get cake mixes, sprinkles, icing, cool looking cupcake wrappers, stickers, glue, plastic gems, fancy crayons, fancy paper, craft supplies, glitter glue, pom poms, etc, etc...

The kid will love it all (if she is anything like my 3 year old) - even (especially) the helping you bake part. And the best thing is, it is all CONSUMABLE. So no giant piece of molded plastic sitting forever in your living room.

As someone who has also spent her fair share of time in a children's hospital, I also like the donation idea.

Good luck.

 

[astylishgirl]

never mind.

 

[SophieLain127]

The Hoof and Hen Ranch:

I understand that people don't read all the post but the first sentence in the OP is "So first let me say that DD's 3rd birthday is January 27th."

So yes I know the first person said they do theirs in a park but everyone else just said do a park with out reading. I know they are just helping but it is kind of hard to take advice when people don't actally read the post. Sorry if it sounds snippy but it was the very first sentence.

 

[saddina]

You may have people who say they'd like to get your daughter something, to them I would suggest clothes a size or 2 up, or a DVD. That way if you end up with 20 DVDS you can take the duplicates to the children's hospital after quietly, and the ones you do take will take up a small amount of room.

Tortoro is a favorite here as well, There's a new film he's releasing in the US this summer, also one of the younger kiddie acceptable ones.

 

[cassie]

This has nothing to do with the party, but my mother had a way of handling "too many toys" that some of you with small children may find helpful. I would get a toy overload every Christmas because we had a large family of doting aunts and uncles. My mother would take about half of the toys and put them away. Then a few weeks later, she would gather up the toys I was playing with, put them away, and out would come the box of new toys. She would rotate the toys every few weeks and that way I didn't get tired of the ones I had and had "new" toys to play with every so often. She also had a small box of "bye bye" toys. This box came out when we were going somewhere so I would have something to keep me occupied while the adults socialized in peace. Then there was the box of "company toys". This box came out only when another child was visiting. That way there was none of the "mine, mine" when another child touched one. It was understood that these toys were meant to be shared. Prevented a lot of warfare.

 

[NancyDz]

How about coming up with a few gifts that would be really helpful in the RV for your mom to get. Like travel games, maybe a web cam so grandma and grandbaby can talk to each other when you are on the road, small personal dvd player so DD can watch her own movies. Maybe give grandma a project like making a small photo album for DD of her and grandma and the family for DD to take with and look through when she misses family. Maybe Grandma just needs to feel more of a part of your plans or understand how she can contribute to it.

Good luck!


Nancy

 

[LA~Poulet]

Quote:
Sorry, I read your OP and missed that you couldn't do it at a park... as far south as we are, we have outdoor parties all year, weather permitting. You say nothing in your original post about no parks, not everyone can read every reply.