A day at the dog park

[Folly's place]

That episode at the park wasn't helpful, for sure. The rest will take time and consistency, and do have help along the way!
She is very smart and sensitive, and also willful. A tricky combination!
We also have a very sensitive rescue dog, and it's taken a lot of time (years!) and she's still a fragile soul.
We joke that when we like them, it's 'sensitive' and when we don't, it's 'neurotic'!
Mary

 

[aart]

I'm actually starting to think it was the experience at the park that caused this...it did start happening shortly afterwards...what do you think? It can't be just a coincidence that these events coincided...can it?

Could very well be...it was 'new to you and her'(I think that was the first dog park visit) experience and not a good one.
Have you exposed her to any other dogs?

 

[Ninjasquirrel]

Could very well be...it was 'new to you and her'(I think that was the first dog park visit) experience and not a good one.
Have you exposed her to any other dogs?

Shes met a few but nothing terribly positive. She was actually fine with my sister's dog...when he was in the fence. I'm gonna get some books from the library about it

 

[townchicks]

The dog park incident could have been the tipping point, exacerbating her insecurity and lack of trust, but the red flags were already there. My experience is that the library is not a good source for good dog behavior books. Many are outdated, or not designed for behavior issues. I love that yours has "Mine!". I know you think you have resolved that issue, but trust me, it's all part of the bigger trust issue. In Mine, you can learn about Conditioned Emotional Response, and counterconditioning that will be useful with her neck sensitivity and anything else that crops up. You've got yourself what we call a project dog, and that's a lifetime of management and retraining. Look for a reactive dog class in your area and work with a real professional on her dog issues. She's clearly not ready for a regular obedience class, and any attempt on your part to "socialize" her, runs the risk of making things worse, if it goes wrong. Whatever you do, please stop watching CM. Please, please please.

 

[jas humbert]

I used to foster rescue dogs for several years. And they are all different and need different techniques. We are here are taking about a dog we have never met and you are the only one with hands on experience with this dog. No doubt a professional trainer could get you started in the right direction but if you can't right now, you can't. It is going to take time- more time than you might think. In general I found it takes at least 6 months for the hardcore ones to get as good as they are going to get. All dogs are individuals and there is only so much that can be done for certain dogs. Some may always be somewhat shy or not perfectly reliable with other dogs. But I'm betting you can make considerably more progress with her.

I once took in a super shy dog who was terrified of everything and everyone. It seems she had been crated most of her life with brief trips out to pee. In the first week we had her in the bedroom while my husband and I were getting dressed. He turned to say something to me with his belt in hand. She saw the belt and dived under the bed and I couldn't get her out for 2 hours. So she was probably abused too. She wasn't aggressive but would fear bite if she felt threatened. But she was such a love when she got to know you. Long story short, I had her for 6 months and while she got a lot better, she would never be a social butterfly. I eventually found her a home with an understanding older woman who lived alone and they had several good years together.

 

[Ninjasquirrel]

I used to foster rescue dogs for several years. And they are all different and need different techniques. We are here are taking about a dog we have never met and you are the only one with hands on experience with this dog. No doubt a professional trainer could get you started in the right direction but if you can't right now, you can't. It is going to take time- more time than you might think. In general I found it takes at least 6 months for the hardcore ones to get as good as they are going to get. All dogs are individuals and there is only so much that can be done for certain dogs. Some may always be somewhat shy or not perfectly reliable with other dogs. But I'm betting you can make considerably more progress with her.

I once took in a super shy dog who was terrified of everything and everyone. It seems she had been crated most of her life with brief trips out to pee. In the first week we had her in the bedroom while my husband and I were getting dressed. He turned to say something to me with his belt in hand. She saw the belt and dived under the bed and I couldn't get her out for 2 hours. So she was probably abused too. She wasn't aggressive but would fear bite if she felt threatened. But she was such a love when she got to know you. Long story short, I had her for 6 months and while she got a lot better, she would never be a social butterfly. I eventually found her a home with an understanding older woman who lived alone and they had several good years together.

I dont expect her to be a social butterfly. Its more that if I take her on a walk I dont want her to attack another dog if the owner happens to be, well, an idiot. I dont expect her to be friends with every dog she meets and I dont expect her to be perfect. I expect that we will have to take things one day at a time. Don't worry @townchicks we have stopped watching CM. I'm now watching professionals who deal with dog aggression on youtube. A professional is still a possibility but I am hopeful we have this based on her demeanour and behavior. We know when we have been bested and will then seek help. Keep in mind though, I have only shared on here the behavior that we needed to correct or that needs to be address. She's very lovey and very good at responding to commands. I appreciate all your advice and I will continue to take what I can get but just saying "go see a professional" over and over is not really helping. I have taken dog behavior classes with my last dog and it was quite helpful. I have been using the strategies I learned during those classes with this dog. I may not be a professional trainer, and I may not know how to deal with every situation. But I am capable of learning and I'm not the typical dog owner that just expects their dog to be perfect. Even if we had gotten a puppy we still would be dealing with behaviors. No dog is perfect and we knew when we adopted her she would require some training. It just has turned out to be a little more than expected. God doesn't give you more than he/she thinks you can handle. It just boils down to what efforts are you willing to take and invest in. I did look into one professional trainer. She only does one on one sessions which is pretty much teaching the owner. I can teach myself just fine and it doesnt cost 150 bucks a session. Again, I will take advice and book recommendations but saying "go to a professional" is not being helpful.

 

[townchicks]

At one point in this thread, you did talk about seeing a behaviorist, so forgive me for thinking that was still on the table. I can tell from what you've done with her that you have some skills. It is important to properly vet those from whom you are taking advice. Check the creds for those you tube videos. If it's off the table, ok, but there is value from going to a professional, they don't just teach you, they observe the dog, and your and your family's interactions with the dog as well. Just sayin', and I'll stop beating that dead horse. I stand by all the books I've already recommended plus anything by those authors. You might enjoy Patricia McConnells blog, also. Suzanne Clothier also has a blog that's good, and if you can get to one of her seminars, I highly recommend her. She's pricy, though. There is an herbal supplement for anxiety called Composure that may help her also. I use it on my new kid, who's very jumpy around other dogs, and wind, and random plastic bags, and who knows what will be next, lol. I get it from Chewy. It's not a cure all, but it helps them be able to relax a little. Some folks have results with CBD for anxiety also, if you can get it.

 

[aart]

Shes met a few but nothing terribly positive. She was actually fine with my sister's dog...when he was in the fence. I'm gonna get some books from the library about it

Baby steps....you and she are still bonding. No need to rush it.

It is important to properly vet those from whom you are taking advice.

Couldn't agree more^^^
...and you don't have to take all the advice being put out there.

 

[Ninjasquirrel]

At one point in this thread, you did talk about seeing a behaviorist, so forgive me for thinking that was still on the table. I can tell from what you've done with her that you have some skills. It is important to properly vet those from whom you are taking advice. Check the creds for those you tube videos. If it's off the table, ok, but there is value from going to a professional, they don't just teach you, they observe the dog, and your and your family's interactions with the dog as well. Just sayin', and I'll stop beating that dead horse. I stand by all the books I've already recommended plus anything by those authors. You might enjoy Patricia McConnells blog, also. Suzanne Clothier also has a blog that's good, and if you can get to one of her seminars, I highly recommend her. She's pricy, though. There is an herbal supplement for anxiety called Composure that may help her also. I use it on my new kid, who's very jumpy around other dogs, and wind, and random plastic bags, and who knows what will be next, lol. I get it from Chewy. It's not a cure all, but it helps them be able to relax a little. Some folks have results with CBD for anxiety also, if you can get it.

Oh no dont get me wrong. Your advice has been quite helpful. Do you have links to those blogs? I'd love to read them. I feel I should also mention that Duchess is now going to the bathroom everytime I take her now with little to no prompts. I'm still giving her treats as well.

 

[Ninjasquirrel]

Baby steps....you and she are still bonding. No need to rush it

I agree but she's one of those "I want our dogs to be friends!" Type of people. I was telling her that shes not ready for that but she doesnt listen. This was less than a week after we adopted her. She then had the audacity to tell me I should "just get a puppy" all because they "cant be friends".