A hundred and one and counting!!!!
- Thread starter chilling in muscadine
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- #22
Quote:
Thanks Robin, I am getting so much positive feedback from this thread. I already knew all you BYC guys were awesome and the responces on this thread just proves it even coming from gals from the good old town of Possum Snout. lol
Thanks Robin, I am getting so much positive feedback from this thread. I already knew all you BYC guys were awesome and the responces on this thread just proves it even coming from gals from the good old town of Possum Snout. lol
Last edited:
- Thread starter
- #24
I have WHAT in my yard? :
Been there, done that, got the T-shirt!!
Welcome back to the land of the living!!!
Many people do not understand the inability to eat. For me it was not feeling worthy of food and hoping to "disappear". It was a vast need to get some control back in my life even if it was in an unhealthy way. It was my body and I wanted control over it for once!
It took me a long time to grasp that I needed to regain control by nurturing myself and the body I inhabited.
I am up to 110 lbs and looking like a woman again!!
Hang in there! Congratulate yourself on going public; there is no way you can know how many people your strength may be helping.
I am so happy for you that you were able to overcome your ED. How long were you ill with this terrible disorder? It does take a long time to get yourself straightened out. I myself didn't think that I ever would. Anorexia ia all about control. I'm hoping by talking about it that maybe it will help someone else in my shoes. I wasn't getting any better hiding behind the illness. Hiding behind the shame didn't help me start to get better it just made things worse.
I almost feel like I am giving myself a second chance and it sure does feel good.
Been there, done that, got the T-shirt!!
Welcome back to the land of the living!!!
Many people do not understand the inability to eat. For me it was not feeling worthy of food and hoping to "disappear". It was a vast need to get some control back in my life even if it was in an unhealthy way. It was my body and I wanted control over it for once!
It took me a long time to grasp that I needed to regain control by nurturing myself and the body I inhabited.
I am up to 110 lbs and looking like a woman again!!
Hang in there! Congratulate yourself on going public; there is no way you can know how many people your strength may be helping.
I am so happy for you that you were able to overcome your ED. How long were you ill with this terrible disorder? It does take a long time to get yourself straightened out. I myself didn't think that I ever would. Anorexia ia all about control. I'm hoping by talking about it that maybe it will help someone else in my shoes. I wasn't getting any better hiding behind the illness. Hiding behind the shame didn't help me start to get better it just made things worse.
I almost feel like I am giving myself a second chance and it sure does feel good.
Yep, good for you! The more people admit it the easier it is for those who suffer from it to recognize it. For me one of the worst parts was the number of people who "encouraged" the behavior by praising me for being so "thin". You know?? 79 lbs is not thin - it's sick!
How long was I sick? I don't really know. I don't know at what specific point I slipped into really ill or at what date I got "better". I slid into more and more ill behavior and worked my way out slowly. I don't think you really get "cured" you get better. I don't think there is a number on the scale that tells me I am well either. It is how I feel!
Today, my body and I are on speaking terms and I even like it!
I am *SO* proud of you!
Yeah Sara!!!!!!!
I know that is a big accomplishment for you.
Of course when I first saw the thread I thought you were counting your chickens......
I am afraid to count mine, I am sure mine is way more than 101
I know that is a big accomplishment for you.
Of course when I first saw the thread I thought you were counting your chickens......
I am afraid to count mine, I am sure mine is way more than 101
- Thread starter
- #28
Quote:
Thanks Jenn, I'm afraid to be to happy yet. I'm afraid my weight will drop back down again. I mean I had made it to 96lbs before and lost back down to the 70's. Its so easy to get yourself back in trouble again. It's weird because the smallest of things can set off the starvation. It doesn't take much to get to that point.
Thanks Jenn, I'm afraid to be to happy yet. I'm afraid my weight will drop back down again. I mean I had made it to 96lbs before and lost back down to the 70's. Its so easy to get yourself back in trouble again. It's weird because the smallest of things can set off the starvation. It doesn't take much to get to that point.
- Thread starter
- #29
Quote:
This is funny because it does sound like I'm counting something. I myself have way more birds. That is why I don't understand why I did starve myself. I have so much life around me. This just shows how powerful the illness is.
This is funny because it does sound like I'm counting something. I myself have way more birds. That is why I don't understand why I did starve myself. I have so much life around me. This just shows how powerful the illness is.
- Thread starter
- #30
I have WHAT in my yard? :
Yep, good for you! The more people admit it the easier it is for those who suffer from it to recognize it. For me one of the worst parts was the number of people who "encouraged" the behavior by praising me for being so "thin". You know?? 79 lbs is not thin - it's sick!
How long was I sick? I don't really know. I don't know at what specific point I slipped into really ill or at what date I got "better". I slid into more and more ill behavior and worked my way out slowly. I don't think you really get "cured" you get better. I don't think there is a number on the scale that tells me I am well either. It is how I feel!
Today, my body and I are on speaking terms and I even like it!
I feel like there will never be a total cure. I feel like it will be like what an addict goes through. Like this is something I will have to worry about the rest of my days.
My illness didn't just slip up on me like some kid wanting to be thin. I am not dissing anyone who has devoloped the illness this way because I'm sure its just as devasting, but I remember the day and time my illness started. It was exactualy the time I was assaulted. I did not know it at the time what was wrong with me except I wouldn't eat and starved myself. Of cource I found out later that with the PTSD and depression and I had developed the disorder.
There has been so many rumors going on about me. The most common one is that I have cancer and I'm dying from it. There has been so many people come to the house to talk with Snakeman and offer there help since I supposedly have cancer. The one that takes the cake is a guy that showed up with flowers to offer his condolence to Snakeman since he said he was out of town and just found out I had died and he was sorry he had missed the service.
I guess in peoples eyes that is something that they can understand. Since I broke the story a couple of years ago about the "AROREXIA" {after the whole cancer ordeal} there has not been one person that has been to the house to offer any help or prayers. This has been the one of many negative acts in my recovery. Snakeman is pretty famous around here and is known by many people for his snake shows and the nuromous shows he puts on here on the property. I am sure this is why he has gotton so many people wanting to concole him. Anorexia just shows you the prejudice that surrounds this illness. Its not contagious guys.
Beside being stared at like I was a crack addicted meth head{or whatever they are calling the dope this week} one of the worse parts was to buy cloths I had to shop in the childrens dept.
There is another rumor going around our small community that is rather humorous. The rumor is I am a lisenced vet. People show up all the time with sick or injured animals begging for my help. I can sorta see how this rumor got started since I am always treating or nursing a animal back to health. I guess the cancer rumor got started because of my weight lose and the way I looked.
To anyone that may be suffering with this problem just remember that there is "HOPE." For such a small word it has a huge meaning.
Yep, good for you! The more people admit it the easier it is for those who suffer from it to recognize it. For me one of the worst parts was the number of people who "encouraged" the behavior by praising me for being so "thin". You know?? 79 lbs is not thin - it's sick!
How long was I sick? I don't really know. I don't know at what specific point I slipped into really ill or at what date I got "better". I slid into more and more ill behavior and worked my way out slowly. I don't think you really get "cured" you get better. I don't think there is a number on the scale that tells me I am well either. It is how I feel!
Today, my body and I are on speaking terms and I even like it!
I feel like there will never be a total cure. I feel like it will be like what an addict goes through. Like this is something I will have to worry about the rest of my days.
My illness didn't just slip up on me like some kid wanting to be thin. I am not dissing anyone who has devoloped the illness this way because I'm sure its just as devasting, but I remember the day and time my illness started. It was exactualy the time I was assaulted. I did not know it at the time what was wrong with me except I wouldn't eat and starved myself. Of cource I found out later that with the PTSD and depression and I had developed the disorder.
There has been so many rumors going on about me. The most common one is that I have cancer and I'm dying from it. There has been so many people come to the house to talk with Snakeman and offer there help since I supposedly have cancer. The one that takes the cake is a guy that showed up with flowers to offer his condolence to Snakeman since he said he was out of town and just found out I had died and he was sorry he had missed the service.
I guess in peoples eyes that is something that they can understand. Since I broke the story a couple of years ago about the "AROREXIA" {after the whole cancer ordeal} there has not been one person that has been to the house to offer any help or prayers. This has been the one of many negative acts in my recovery. Snakeman is pretty famous around here and is known by many people for his snake shows and the nuromous shows he puts on here on the property. I am sure this is why he has gotton so many people wanting to concole him. Anorexia just shows you the prejudice that surrounds this illness. Its not contagious guys.
Beside being stared at like I was a crack addicted meth head{or whatever they are calling the dope this week} one of the worse parts was to buy cloths I had to shop in the childrens dept.
There is another rumor going around our small community that is rather humorous. The rumor is I am a lisenced vet. People show up all the time with sick or injured animals begging for my help. I can sorta see how this rumor got started since I am always treating or nursing a animal back to health. I guess the cancer rumor got started because of my weight lose and the way I looked.
To anyone that may be suffering with this problem just remember that there is "HOPE." For such a small word it has a huge meaning.
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