Anxiety and Death **UPDATE** Post #12

[SarahFair]

Can anyone else "sense" death is coming?

For a few weeks now I just cant get it off my mind. Its to the point where I am in a panic at times. Its what I think about when I go to sleep, tossing and turning till I am just too tired.
Honestly I think it is myself or someone close to me that is going to go. Not sure if its going to be cancer or a car wreck... but I think its going to be quick.
If it is myself I am scared for my children.. and honestly for myself. Usually I havent feared death until now.. The thought of not living my life scares me. The thought of rotting in the ground, scares me.
Its not the first time Ive known death was going to come knocking.


I just dont know if I can handle another death. I dont take them emotionally but more physiologically.
When I got the news of my mothers death I was cooking my SO bacon and eggs for breakfast. That was in 08 and I think Ive cooked him breakfast a total of 5 times since then.
..and I use to cook it for him every morning. My housework has suffered tremendously. I kind of feel like "what do I have to prove anymore?".
My fear is ...what am I going to loose next?



A few times I sat in the shower and cried over this feeling I have. Ive tried looking it up, Ive tried forgetting it, Ive tried letting fate have its way.. Nothing works.
Im starting to get more and more into panic mode.
...What if its my SO I loose? What if its my father, sister, aunt, cousin...?
What am I suppose to do with these feelings?!?!



Has anyone else had them? Known anyone else to have them before they died?
Anyone have any answers?!?!

 

[sourland]

Is there any possibility that you are dealing with a chemical imbalance leading to anxiety? Many members of my wife's family have had similar problems and with the proper medications the issues are resolved. I have seen first hand how such fears can run rampant. Consider seeing a medical doctor.

 

[mulewagon]

I don't want to add to your anxiety, but to urge you to call your doctor. One of the symptoms of an imminent heart attack in women is "a feeling of doom".

So get it checked out, okay? Then if you're heart's fine, they can deal with the anxiety.

 

[melodie_a]

Are you on any medications? My husband was taking Ambien and Adderall and he started having those same feelings. He was terrified that we were going to all be killed every time we left the house. He was also extremely depressed at the time while he was out of work so I am not sure if the stress played a part or not. He said there were days when he just knew that either me or the kids wouldn't make it home.

 

[SarahFair]

No meds and no fear of anything else..
And a heart attack at 23?

Ive had this fear throughout my life.
2 fellow classmates died in car wrecks, a great grandmother, and my mother.
None were ever this strong before.


Im pretty sure my SOs granny is about to go. Her health is getting worse and worse and you can just read it in her..
Shes ready to go.


But I dont think shes it.

 

[punk-a-doodle]

These sound like panic attacks and/or chronic anxiety. Please seek a doctor and/or therapist for help.

 

[redhen]

Sarah, i also (sometimes), get anxiety over death, and bad "feelings" that someone close to me is going to die.
My biggest fear is loosing my parents or husband. And i also get anxiety sometimes thinking of HOW i will die... I dont want to not be hear anymore. When you're gone.. thats it. I've seen too much death in my life..

Recently (with-in the last few months), i have had dreams of my mother passing, dreams so real i feel them all day long..... which scares me because, when i once dreamed that my dog Mandy died..she DID actually die. (with-in a short time of the dream. And the dream was sooo real... i remember waking up with my chest hurting and crying..it was just so real.(this was years ago..) And not long after that dream(i's say with-in a few weeks..) she started to have seizures and wouldnt come out of them..( Later found out she got bit by a copperhead..)
I dont get to the extent that you are describing... i just get a tightness in my chest and feel anxious for a little bit... but it always passes pretty quickly..
I guess i just tell myself that i cant change whats going to happen... and maybe my feelings are just wacko and its all in my head....
It sucks, life is SO short.... thats why i try to enjoy every day.
Sorry you are feeling this way...

 

[gritsar]

My mom knew when each of her parents died, before anyone could call to tell her. Recently I got myself all worked up because I had the feeling there was going to be a death in the family; I felt sure it would be my dad. Turns out it was my sister.
Yes I walk around sometimes with the feeling that "the other shoe is about to drop". It's not a fun feeling, but what can you do?

Sorry Sarah.

 

[Carolyn]

I doubt you are over your Mom's death yet so you do have signs of depression and obviously anxiety also. I agree seeing a doctor is a good idea. If it affects your eating and sleeping is all the more reason to see a doctor. Stess does a lot of damage to our bodies not just our minds.

Yes, I have had those feelings. Sometimes about myself and sometimes about others. I have been right sometimes and obviously I have been wrong. Fear and worry can become very obsessive and if you worry enough that something bad is going to happen it usually does. Most of the big disasters in my family were not the ones I worried about.

As a nurse I have worked in hospice. This is what I tell my patients who are preparing to die: Settle your affairs; make your peace with others; make your peace with God and use your time wisely. This is not bad advice for any of us.

I am a Christian and believe that we need a time when we recognize we can only be saved for eternity by trusting in the fact that Jesus paid for our sins when He died at Calvary. God knew none of us could save ourselves and He gave us the gift of salvation. Like any gift we need to accept it for it to be ours. He means for us to have peace and let Him handle the problems. Those may not be your beliefs but I share it because I know a lot of people who are fearful of dying and don't have any answers. These are the only answers I have.

The book "Heaven is for Real" is easy to read and gave me a real peace before I underwent a heart procedure this summer. I had that sense that something bad was going to happen. Actually it did, I blacked out after I got home and fell and broke my ankle, not near as bad as I imagined.

You are probably one of those people who is very intuitive but worrying is not going to help you or your loved ones. You need some peace and I pray you find it.

 

[SarahFair]

I actaully feel a lot better getting it off my chest. I told my SO about it but he told me I was going to have to stop cause it was freaking him out.
The anxiety is more like a fidget (kinda like RLS all over the body) than a heavy breathing, tightness, wide eyed panic.

I dont want medications. I dont want them to rule my life. With addiction running strong in my family I dont want ANYTHING. Im not sure if my empathatic feelings have tuned into his granny..
She is so depressed. When she sits around family she just stares off. In recent years shes always talking and laughing, telling stories.. Now she just seems down and out about everything.
I watch her as everyone passes around her. Its like.. Ive never seen so much sorrow trapped in a single body.
My heart hurts for her