Any Home Bakers Here?

[BullChick]

Hello,

@BullChick, that monkey bread sounds really good, I might just try it. Do you have any specific recipe that might be good?

@ronott1, glad the curse has not passed on to you. When I made crockpot taco soup, no matter where we put it, it always spilled. That was the curse. No matter what precautions we took, it always spilled.

I bet it tastes really good!

@penny1960, thanks for the kind comment.

That big Goose has a surprisingly large amount of meat on it. Its about as big as a store-bought goose. Maybe bigger. Took me a good hour to get all the feathers off that Goose alone.

Anyway, it's in the freezer waiting for Thanksgiving.

Jared

Ugh! Aren’t waterfowl just the worst? Tip! Add a drop of Dawn to the scald water. It gets through the oil that they use to waterproof themselves.

I prefer the garlic monkey bread.
2 lbs of bread dough (or one. Just adjust time)
1 stick of butter
Garlic powder/cloves (please don’t think I actually measure!)

Grease a bundt pan (I’ve used a cookie sheet. Any pan should actually work!).
Melt butter in a bowl, and drop golf ball sized chunks of dough into butter. Put into pan. Continue until the first layer is done. Sprinkle on some garlic powder. Add another layer of dough balls. Sprinkle garlic. Continue until you’re out of dough.
Allow dough to rise until pan is about 3/4 full. Preheat oven to 350* Bake for 45 minutes. For smaller batches, start at thirty minutes.

 

[BullChick]

I wrote this when she was one.

Making Monkey Bread with a Duckling (formerly a monkey)

Step one, strip. Yourself or just the toddler, both are recommended. She will be messy, then want picked up. Wear an apron. She needs somewhere to wipe her hands.
Step two, don't expect to get this done quickly. It is going to take three hours to get it into the oven. Twenty actual minutes of prep, the rest keeping a child safe in the kitchen, and the house safe from a child!

Begin with two, 1 pound loaves of bread dough. If using apples, get them peeled and cored. Dice to whatever size you desire. Bigger chunks are more flavorful.
Place apples in a bowl with lid or a Ziploc bag, and add your own recipe of cinnamon sugar. Allow toddler to shake the crap out of it. Hurry up, and begin the next step while toddler is preoccupied.
Melt one to one and a half sticks of butter. One makes a cleaner batch, and is plenty if you're adding apples.
Mix up the sugar mix. It's cleaner to use a ziplock bag. Choose to use the bowl anyway. Give toddler a smile as you say no to being picked up.

Pull apart dough, and roll into golfball pieces. Dip in butter, and roll into sugar. Realize you forgot to grease the pan.
Wash your hands, and spray the pan. Add a layer of apples and raisins (apples are juicy) if using. Drop in your covered ball of dough. Pick up insistent toddler, and get the next ball of dough. Realize that you should have used the Ziploc bag as I said to begin with because now there is cinnamon sugar in your butter.
Begin pulling apart a bunch of dough, and rolling into balls. Drop a few in the butter. Remove to the too small bowl of sugar, and try to coat without getting sugar all over the counter. Place into pan. Get more cinnamon sugar into your butter. Realize that a fork would make this easier. Dismiss fork because the ness is already there. Take yogurt from child's hands, and make them a smoothie. Don't swear as you search for the rubber stopper to the lid of the sippy cup.
Stop trying to make perfect sized golf balls. Stop trying to roll the dough at all! Grab a gob, get it wet, get it sticky, throw into pan. Repeat. Suck on slobbery cup, and discover that there is a blockage. Try to fix with more milk, and return to child. Continue with what you were doing. Ignore the fact that you just got your child's cup really sticky. Walk around with her attached to your leg. Wonder why you taught her to do that in the first place. Smile because every child deserves this memory.
Kick the dog with leg the child is attached to because you didn't notice he was licking up the cinnamon on the floor. Apologize to dog. Listen to toddler giggle.
Pull off more dough, and pray you have enough butter. Take the sippy cup being banged against your hip. Suck on it again, then spit out the big gob of ...you don't want to know! Realize that there's still a blockage, and work on that for a few minutes. Return sippy cup to tired, whining toddler. Wonder why you didn't just do this while she was sleeping. Remember that helping in the kitchen is a bonding experience as well as a learning experience. Wonder if she's learning, or if you are! Realize you have learned that this is not a toddler friendly recipe. Vow to wait until she's older to make it with her again.

When all dough is gone, add more apples and raisins if using. Allow to rest until the pan is 3/4 full. I meant the bread! You have a mess to clean up!
Follow the mess to the toddler.
Put sticky dog in the tub with toddler. Ponder getting in too. Wonder how the dog got cinnamon in his ear. Clean ... Whatever that is out of the toddler's ears. Put her down for a nap.
Put the bread in the preheating oven because you don't feel like waiting for it to finish rising. Set timer. Look at the mess in the kitchen, and go take a nap yourself.
Remember why you don't make monkey bread very often!
Make it again a week later for the church potluck.

 

[ronott1]

Hello,

@ronott1, glad the curse has not passed on to you. When I made crockpot taco soup, no matter where we put it, it always spilled. That was the curse. No matter what precautions we took, it always spilled.

I bet it tastes really good!

@penny1960, thanks for the kind comment.

That big Goose has a surprisingly large amount of meat on it. Its about as big as a store-bought goose. Maybe bigger. Took me a good hour to get all the feathers off that Goose alone.

Anyway, it's in the freezer waiting for Thanksgiving.

Jared

The soup did not spill! The curse is broken!

 

[pennyJo1960]

I wrote this when she was one.

Making Monkey Bread with a Duckling (formerly a monkey)

Step one, strip. Yourself or just the toddler, both are recommended. She will be messy, then want picked up. Wear an apron. She needs somewhere to wipe her hands.
Step two, don't expect to get this done quickly. It is going to take three hours to get it into the oven. Twenty actual minutes of prep, the rest keeping a child safe in the kitchen, and the house safe from a child!

Begin with two, 1 pound loaves of bread dough. If using apples, get them peeled and cored. Dice to whatever size you desire. Bigger chunks are more flavorful.
Place apples in a bowl with lid or a Ziploc bag, and add your own recipe of cinnamon sugar. Allow toddler to shake the crap out of it. Hurry up, and begin the next step while toddler is preoccupied.
Melt one to one and a half sticks of butter. One makes a cleaner batch, and is plenty if you're adding apples.
Mix up the sugar mix. It's cleaner to use a ziplock bag. Choose to use the bowl anyway. Give toddler a smile as you say no to being picked up.

Pull apart dough, and roll into golfball pieces. Dip in butter, and roll into sugar. Realize you forgot to grease the pan.
Wash your hands, and spray the pan. Add a layer of apples and raisins (apples are juicy) if using. Drop in your covered ball of dough. Pick up insistent toddler, and get the next ball of dough. Realize that you should have used the Ziploc bag as I said to begin with because now there is cinnamon sugar in your butter.
Begin pulling apart a bunch of dough, and rolling into balls. Drop a few in the butter. Remove to the too small bowl of sugar, and try to coat without getting sugar all over the counter. Place into pan. Get more cinnamon sugar into your butter. Realize that a fork would make this easier. Dismiss fork because the ness is already there. Take yogurt from child's hands, and make them a smoothie. Don't swear as you search for the rubber stopper to the lid of the sippy cup.
Stop trying to make perfect sized golf balls. Stop trying to roll the dough at all! Grab a gob, get it wet, get it sticky, throw into pan. Repeat. Suck on slobbery cup, and discover that there is a blockage. Try to fix with more milk, and return to child. Continue with what you were doing. Ignore the fact that you just got your child's cup really sticky. Walk around with her attached to your leg. Wonder why you taught her to do that in the first place. Smile because every child deserves this memory.
Kick the dog with leg the child is attached to because you didn't notice he was licking up the cinnamon on the floor. Apologize to dog. Listen to toddler giggle.
Pull off more dough, and pray you have enough butter. Take the sippy cup being banged against your hip. Suck on it again, then spit out the big gob of ...you don't want to know! Realize that there's still a blockage, and work on that for a few minutes. Return sippy cup to tired, whining toddler. Wonder why you didn't just do this while she was sleeping. Remember that helping in the kitchen is a bonding experience as well as a learning experience. Wonder if she's learning, or if you are! Realize you have learned that this is not a toddler friendly recipe. Vow to wait until she's older to make it with her again.

When all dough is gone, add more apples and raisins if using. Allow to rest until the pan is 3/4 full. I meant the bread! You have a mess to clean up!
Follow the mess to the toddler.
Put sticky dog in the tub with toddler. Ponder getting in too. Wonder how the dog got cinnamon in his ear. Clean ... Whatever that is out of the toddler's ears. Put her down for a nap.
Put the bread in the preheating oven because you don't feel like waiting for it to finish rising. Set timer. Look at the mess in the kitchen, and go take a nap yourself.
Remember why you don't make monkey bread very often!
Make it again a week later for the church potluck.

I would pay to see this Goodnight

 

[DigMyChicks]

I wrote this when she was one.

Making Monkey Bread with a Duckling (formerly a monkey)

Step one, strip. Yourself or just the toddler, both are recommended. She will be messy, then want picked up. Wear an apron. She needs somewhere to wipe her hands.
Step two, don't expect to get this done quickly. It is going to take three hours to get it into the oven. Twenty actual minutes of prep, the rest keeping a child safe in the kitchen, and the house safe from a child!

Begin with two, 1 pound loaves of bread dough. If using apples, get them peeled and cored. Dice to whatever size you desire. Bigger chunks are more flavorful.
Place apples in a bowl with lid or a Ziploc bag, and add your own recipe of cinnamon sugar. Allow toddler to shake the crap out of it. Hurry up, and begin the next step while toddler is preoccupied.
Melt one to one and a half sticks of butter. One makes a cleaner batch, and is plenty if you're adding apples.
Mix up the sugar mix. It's cleaner to use a ziplock bag. Choose to use the bowl anyway. Give toddler a smile as you say no to being picked up.

Pull apart dough, and roll into golfball pieces. Dip in butter, and roll into sugar. Realize you forgot to grease the pan.
Wash your hands, and spray the pan. Add a layer of apples and raisins (apples are juicy) if using. Drop in your covered ball of dough. Pick up insistent toddler, and get the next ball of dough. Realize that you should have used the Ziploc bag as I said to begin with because now there is cinnamon sugar in your butter.
Begin pulling apart a bunch of dough, and rolling into balls. Drop a few in the butter. Remove to the too small bowl of sugar, and try to coat without getting sugar all over the counter. Place into pan. Get more cinnamon sugar into your butter. Realize that a fork would make this easier. Dismiss fork because the ness is already there. Take yogurt from child's hands, and make them a smoothie. Don't swear as you search for the rubber stopper to the lid of the sippy cup.
Stop trying to make perfect sized golf balls. Stop trying to roll the dough at all! Grab a gob, get it wet, get it sticky, throw into pan. Repeat. Suck on slobbery cup, and discover that there is a blockage. Try to fix with more milk, and return to child. Continue with what you were doing. Ignore the fact that you just got your child's cup really sticky. Walk around with her attached to your leg. Wonder why you taught her to do that in the first place. Smile because every child deserves this memory.
Kick the dog with leg the child is attached to because you didn't notice he was licking up the cinnamon on the floor. Apologize to dog. Listen to toddler giggle.
Pull off more dough, and pray you have enough butter. Take the sippy cup being banged against your hip. Suck on it again, then spit out the big gob of ...you don't want to know! Realize that there's still a blockage, and work on that for a few minutes. Return sippy cup to tired, whining toddler. Wonder why you didn't just do this while she was sleeping. Remember that helping in the kitchen is a bonding experience as well as a learning experience. Wonder if she's learning, or if you are! Realize you have learned that this is not a toddler friendly recipe. Vow to wait until she's older to make it with her again.

When all dough is gone, add more apples and raisins if using. Allow to rest until the pan is 3/4 full. I meant the bread! You have a mess to clean up!
Follow the mess to the toddler.
Put sticky dog in the tub with toddler. Ponder getting in too. Wonder how the dog got cinnamon in his ear. Clean ... Whatever that is out of the toddler's ears. Put her down for a nap.
Put the bread in the preheating oven because you don't feel like waiting for it to finish rising. Set timer. Look at the mess in the kitchen, and go take a nap yourself.
Remember why you don't make monkey bread very often!
Make it again a week later for the church potluck.

Love the story! Priceless!

 

[rjohns39]

Love the story! Priceless!

X2

 

[jnicholes]

@DigMyChicks, That was a funny story.

That reminded me of a story that happened many years ago, I simply referred to it as "the cursed soup." Already posted that story, so I won't post it again unless someone asked me to.

As for funny baking stories, I got one myself. So, when I was making cheese, I followed everything perfectly. I was making a very large wheel of mozzarella. It then got time to add the salt. After it was done, I took a slice and ate it. It tasted awful. I tried to figure out what was wrong, eventually I figured out what happened. Instead of putting in a quarter cup of salt into the whey to add the saltiness to the cheese, I accidentally added a quarter cup of citric acid.

I then quoted the TV show Wallace and Gromit, who in the show are obsessed with cheese.

"I don't know, lad. It's like no cheese I've ever tasted."

Ever since then, I double check the ingredients I'm putting in to make sure it does not happen again.

I still had a pretty good laugh!

Jared

 

[jnicholes]

Sorry, I made a mistake in my last post. I meant to say the following

@BullChick, that was a funny story.

Jared

 

[BullChick]

Saltwater Taffy

1 C Kayro syrup (light or dark)
3/4 C water
1/2 Tb butter
2 C sugar
1Tb cornstarch
3/4 tsp salt
Vanilla extrat

Butter a 13x9 pan.
Combine sugar, cornstarch, salt and butter in a saucepan. Add syrup and water. Stir until it boils rapidly, and forms hard balls when dropped in a bowl of water. Add a few drops of vanilla.
Pour into buttered pan until cool enough to handle. Scrub your hands, and then rub with butter. Pair up, and pull the taffy until it’s firm.

 

[ronott1]

Saltwater Taffy

1 C Kayro syrup (light or dark)
3/4 C water
1/2 Tb butter
2 C sugar
1Tb cornstarch
3/4 tsp salt
Vanilla extrat

Butter a 13x9 pan.
Combine sugar, cornstarch, salt and butter in a saucepan. Add syrup and water. Stir until it boils rapidly, and forms hard balls when dropped in a bowl of water. Add a few drops of vanilla.
Pour into buttered pan until cool enough to handle. Scrub your hands, and then rub with butter. Pair up, and pull the taffy until it’s firm.

Perfect for a rainy day with wound up offspring!