Anybody have advice for Couples Trying to Conceive.

[kelseygirl707]

Hello all,
So yes, I know this is a strange site to post this on, but I get so much more positive feedback here than on Baby sites, and everybody is just so kind on here, so here it goes.

Hubby and I Miscarried about a year ago, We were not trying to get pregnant, but were excited anyway, and I took it pretty hard, but I was finishing plans on our Wedding, so I diverted my attention there. We were married in July, and we decided to try to Conceive in September, we tried for about 6 months, then went back on birth control, because we were dealing with a Crazy Homeless man who had threatend my life, and we did not feel comfortable trying to bring a child into our lives until we straightend out that issue. Now two months later we have decided to try again.

So I was hoping some of my wonderful BYC family members would have some advice, or a trick that worked for them, that they don't mind passing along.

I know a big issue for us is that I have an anxiety disorder, so no mater what I do I will always have stress in my daily life, and stress can throw my body out of wack real fast.

I know Mother nature has a plan, I just hate not knowing what it is, LOL.

 

[Cetawin]

My dear

I lost 8 babies before, in between & after my two wonderful children were born 12 years apart. Been there, done that, saw the specialist and all that hoopla. Was told I was sterile ... So, I cried and resigned myself to the fact I would not have children, went on with my life and 4 months later I was pregnant with my wonderful son.

Your mind and your trying so hard will throw your body out of whack. Look forward to future plans, go on with your life, toss any birth control out the window, concentrate on loving your spouse....it will happen when it is meant to be.

I truly believe our children choose us...so when your child is ready for this world, he/she will find you.

Stay strong, stay positive and enjoy life...let mother nature and the Creator take care of the rest.

 

[NewHopePoultry]

Hi, me and my husband tried for several months before giving up and about a month after we stopped trying I got pregnant. Dont stress or worry yourself over trying to get pregnant(I know its hard to do) I have depression and several anxiety disorders, so I know how hard it is.
Do you keep track of your cycle? Theres only about 3 days a month when you have a very high chance of getting pregnant. I used www.mymonthlycycles.com and it helped alot, it tells you what days you are more fertile.

 

[Sock Puppet]

Quote:
Well said. That is what I had to do. Just not worry about it.

I do understand, it can be tuff to get pregnant. Ive been married 16 years and only have 4 kids. Had a tubal and lots of miscarriages. Ive never used birth control, EVER. Knew I would have a hard time getting pregnant.

So yes, its hard not to think about it, but that seems to be the times when I would get pregnant

 

[FrenchHen]

Hormonal birth control can delay conception for over a year. That rule seems to bend only for couples who aren't hoping for kids. So give yourself a year and a half before allowing yourself to be concerned.

I found I was pregnant a couple of weeks after getting adoption information in the mail. We still want to adopt, but we had kids the other way first.

 

[Tala]

Get rich.

I'm 23 years old and haven't used any birth control in over 2 years. No money for doctors, tests, or treatments.

And I have charted my cycles, I used www.fertilityfriend.com and I own the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" but I gave up after a while.

Someone my age should have gotten pregnant at least accidentally by now!!

I am seriously considering going on the pill so I won't get my hopes up every month, and maybe it'll do something for the PMS too.

 

[kelseygirl707]

Thanks Everybody.
I have been told the same thing by several people, to just stop trying, and it just seems to pop up out of no where, but it just seems impossible to not think about it. Especially Beacuse we just tossed the BC again, so now it's all exciting again. And yes I do try to track my cycle, but the Anxiety disorder makes me somewhat untrackable. And ovulation strips don't seem to work, I have a friend who is a Doula, and she told me that thay don't work for some women, because they only have a 12 hour window of ovulation, so if you only test once a day, you can miss it. Ugh, I started hatching Chickens hoping it would keep my mind occupied, But it doesn't.

 

[kelseygirl707]

Quote:
I know what you mean, I'm 22, and My hubby is 29, I thought being as young as we are, it would just happen. The pregnancy I lost, I was on BC, so I thought it would be no issue if I was no longer using BC. I have about 6 books, I have probably read 4 times each, I have read every baby site, and Discovery Health Channel does not help, LOL, Every other show on there is about Babies and Pregnancy.

 

[Tala]

What frustrates me - I can get an exam and pills from Planned Parenthood for free or very cheap (I'm unemployed) but the only thing they will do for people who want to get pregnant is refer you to a RE which I could barely afford and then any tests or treatments? I read a website and they wanted $1200 UP FRONT for fertility tests at their clinic!!
Basically if you're poor you can't do a darn thing about it.
And as I understand it, you gotta have money even to adopt so I'm trying to just kill the mothering dream.

Fortunately, having chicks has helped me some. I gotta keep myself busy. Chicks, puppies, gardening, etc. other stuff to "mother"

It was easier to stay busy when I had a job.

 

[redhen]

It will happen if its meant to...

it will be okay...