Anyone non-religious here? Please be nice!

[deb1]

Quote:
I don't know what you can say. The problem might be that you and your SIL are coming from different mindsets and she might be unable to comprehend what you are saying.

For her, part of her faith involves talking and thinking continously about God. She probably feels that any restriction, even for reasons of politeness, are a form of discimination against her.

I was discussing a similar issue with my friend. The teachers in her church can not bring up their faith with their students unless the kids ask. That seems fair to me. My friend thought that was wrong. All Christians should, she believes, be able to evangelize whenever the opportunity arises.

 

[EweSheep]

She has been warned before about her attire when her marriage was in trouble and she got it straightened out because she really depended on her UPS job to support her family. Now the co workers are complaining that she is making too much of an issue talking about religion, "God this and God that" and from what I am observing, is that she acted like a puppet which someone else is doing the talking for her.

Workplaces do not like people talking too much about religion which I can understand that perfectly. It does make some people uncomfortable and why should they be forced to listen to it while you are proclaiming it. I can understand the freedom of speech but where does the boundary ends? Do you do this to be heard? Do you want God to HEAR you or at least respond to you? Are you doing this just to grab attention of others, causing problems or causing turmoil or unsettling, conflict feelings among the coworkers? They are aware of her marriage problems and when folks are reminding her about her complaints, she would get "religious" on them. As for me, all I could do is to smile and nod my head as I understand how she is feeling but I do not agree with the contents in the Bible that she is interpreting.

In my previous workplace, if you debate on religion or start stirring up the hornet's nest getting all riled up about it among the coworkers, making them uncomfortable, you would get the first and only warning. The second time, you would get fired. Period!

I am not sure about UPS regulations but it was enough to make her uptight at work because she could not openly talk about religion as a freedom of speech as her church friends are telling her that she needs to speak up because it is a free country and freedom of speech is still here to stay. She got five FB friends telling her that she needs to YELLL out to the Lord for his glory despite of what UPS staff (probably supervisor as well) thinks of her. If she keeps it up, she is going to lose her job for sure and it is not going to help her regain confidence among co workers if she continues to rejoice.

As my hubby says, religion and education and politics do not mix....they are like oil and water. (exception for Christian schools or private religious schools). At his workplace, religion discussion is prohibited ON premises but you can talk about it on the sidewalk or public place outside of the work area.

She is a good person with good intentions but looks like trouble in the horizon for her at work.

 

[deb1]

Ewesheep, I would ask her if those people who are encouraging her to go against regulations are going to pay her food and housing bills when she gets fired.

 

[Pupsnpullets]

Quote:
Does this mean she only goes off the rails when her marriage is in trouble? Interesting. Perhaps if this is so she needs to be hooked up with the church marriage councelor.

 

[EweSheep]

She does NOT want counseling neither does her husband. They said counseling are for the birds and it would not help either one of them. the only thing she wanted was her church friends to give her the moral support. her and hubby no longer does things around with their kids. The church is her only outlet for her troubled marriage.

Deb1, that would be a very good point to make who is going to support her and her family if she loses it! She is a primary breadwinner while hubby is faking disability too many times to count. I do know that she is trying to get the income tax money this year to file for divorce but still hemmed and hawed about it.

She was posting on FB last year about her marriage problems and her work place told her to knock it off because she works at front desk, dealing with the public. With the religious stuff going on, she started this "oozing" when she joined this church and they all welcomed her and made her part of the church members. She is actively involved with the church as much as she can along with her daughters' events as well. She is now a UPS van driver, part time.

Oh she is only 28 years old. I think she was married for at least seven or eight years?

 

[mom'sfolly]

It may be that you need to pose some what if questions to your SIL.

What if someone was talking about wicca all day long, bringing the goddess into every conversational opportunity, would that be okay at work?
Would it be okay for someone to spout Aryan Brotherhood speak all day at work, with a derogatory comment for every minority that crossed his path?
How about the right-to-lifer to talks about abortion and its evils all day?
How about the single guy who won't shut up about his active and varied sex life?

The workplace is not necessarily a free speech zone. It is a private business, and they can set standards. They can also say that certain speech creates a hostile work environment, or an environment of harassment.

Some people don't know where to draw the line. I worked with one man who was extremely preachy at work, both about religion and about his political views. He belonged to a fundamentalist church, that moved from strip mall to strip mall, and he constantly spouted about his guns and views about guns. He just wouldn't stop. Finally, he went after someone about the Roman Catholic church. She was a very devout Catholic, smart and well educated. She let him go on for a while, and finally cut him off with a "the apostle Peter started my church 2000 years ago, who started yours?", and then she walked away. It was one of the best and most polite put downs I've ever seen. The guy just stood there sputtering!

 

[SunnyDawn]

Quote:
I'm not much for theater normally but this sounds like something I could support. Just the basic plot (and the fact it is struggling) speaks to the assumptions of most religions.

That's just my point, Sunny. It is a non-religious play about a very religious theme. I'm not quite sure what is keeping people away but possibly the religious folk think it's sacrilegious and the non-religious think it is religious,

Anyway I enjoyed it immensely and I consider myself a believer in a non judgmental higher power, with little/no time for organized religion.

I think you are right. I couldn't quite tell from the title and description if it was religious or not and probably would not have gone to see it based on that alone. Now I'd love to see it! Do they have a web site so I can see where and when they are going to be performing near me?

Ewesheep, I agree with Mom'sfolly. I doubt there is anything you could say to your SIL to get her to see things from the other person's perspective. She will just assume that anyone who gets offended by her religious references is that much more in need of them, since they obviously haven't got a personal relationship with the Lord, and she will try even harder to "save" these heathens who just don't understand yet.

My soon to be SIL (son-in-law) is only tolerant of my heathen views because he is sure I still have time to see the "error" of my ways and to "accept the Lord Jesus as my savior".
Jeez, I just had a terrible thought. If I don't die suddenly, my death bed scene could get really ugly!

"Oh Lord save me from your devout followers".

Rusty, I can't comment on the opulence thing and still be nice!

This is a very sore subject with me. I cringe when I see an opulent church serving a very modest community. Why can't this money be used to benefit more folks in the community?!!! Why are people that are are struggling still forking over cash to the church?!!! Sorry, I will stop there. My family and I have always tried to help others whose need is greater than ours and this is the kind of thing that just...

 

[Pupsnpullets]

Quote:
That's just my point, Sunny. It is a non-religious play about a very religious theme. I'm not quite sure what is keeping people away but possibly the religious folk think it's sacrilegious and the non-religious think it is religious,

Anyway I enjoyed it immensely and I consider myself a believer in a non judgmental higher power, with little/no time for organized religion.

I think you are right. I couldn't quite tell from the title and description if it was religious or not and probably would not have gone to see it based on that alone. Now I'd love to see it! Do they have a web site so I can see where and when they are going to be performing near me?

Ewesheep, I agree with Mom's folly. I doubt there is anything you could say to your SIL to get her to see things from the other person's perspective. She will just assume that anyone who gets offended by her religious references is that much more in need of them, since they obviously haven't got a personal relationship with the Lord, and she will try even harder to "save" these heathens who just don't understand yet.

My soon to be SIL (son-in-law) is only tolerant of my heathen views because he is sure I still have time to see the "error" of my ways and to "accept the Lord Jesus as my savior".
Jeez, I just had a terrible thought. If I don't die suddenly, my death bed scene could get really ugly!

"Oh Lord save me from your devout followers".

Here's the website: http://www.thesphericalweproductions.com/page4/thedaughterseminar.html

It may be a little while before it gets out there but you can check on the progress at least.

 

[EweSheep]

mom'sfolly :

It may be that you need to pose some what if questions to your SIL.

What if someone was talking about wicca all day long, bringing the goddess into every conversational opportunity, would that be okay at work?
Would it be okay for someone to spout Aryan Brotherhood speak all day at work, with a derogatory comment for every minority that crossed his path?
How about the right-to-lifer to talks about abortion and its evils all day?
How about the single guy who won't shut up about his active and varied sex life?

The workplace is not necessarily a free speech zone. It is a private business, and they can set standards. They can also say that certain speech creates a hostile work environment, or an environment of harassment.

Some people don't know where to draw the line. I worked with one man who was extremely preachy at work, both about religion and about his political views. He belonged to a fundamentalist church, that moved from strip mall to strip mall, and he constantly spouted about his guns and views about guns. He just wouldn't stop. Finally, he went after someone about the Roman Catholic church. She was a very devout Catholic, smart and well educated. She let him go on for a while, and finally cut him off with a "the apostle Peter started my church 2000 years ago, who started yours?", and then she walked away. It was one of the best and most polite put downs I've ever seen. The guy just stood there sputtering!

With my sister's SIL, these are worthy questions to ask!

I am not sure if UPS is a private business but they do set standards. Including the dress codes which you could NOT wear baggy, off the hip kind of jeans, that was a no no! And when you are a driver or working at front desk, must be wearing brown with UPS logo on them.

I love that story!​

 

[EweSheep]

Here is her next response on FB:

We Cant be friendly with sin and expect our lives to remain unaffected!


HUH???????????? She lost me!