Apparently you can’t die of embarrassment..

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Girl you are not! Maybe you’re like I am, and you just FEEL old and decrepit! I’ll be complaining to my in-laws or my Dr and they’re like, oh you’re still young!
Me: Compared to what??? Try telling back how young I am…or my eyesight, or my left ankle, or my hormones, or my gallbladder, or my..the list goes on and on.
Age is mind over matter, if you don’t mind it don’t matter.
 
For those that need a laugh at someone else’s expense, read on.
My area is mostly farm country, with deep wooded areas. There’s been coyote sightings, and I’ve personally seen at least three. Needless to say I’ve been on high alert. Some neighbors of mine seen or heard coyotes in her backyard and called the police. The police in turn called animal control. (I guess in case it was just dogs, idk) While this was going on my hens starting making a ruckus. It’s about 7:30 pm, dark and cold, the chickens are up for the night. I heard my roosters crowing and what sounded like hurt/scared chickens. I grabbed my coat, and shoes and ran down to the coop. Long story short, the police, and animal control come by and there I am in.. pink Garfield pj bottoms, a Stranger Things tshirt, a polka dotted robe, a 15 year old parka, the fur lining on the hood it ripped and flapping in the wind. And to top it off I’m wearing my husbands work boots, with a serving fork in one hand (my closet weapon), and my sons lilo and stitch flash light.
Oh did I mention I have motion lights so my yard is lit up like the 4th of July.
In the end the game warden has to come and deal with the coyotes. (I’ll believe it when I see it), my chickens are fine and I didn’t die of embarrassment. However I won’t be going to any town council meetings any time soon…
I think you might have been okay if not for the fork. (Stay away from the council.)
 
Right? I should mention no one else was home at the time and my phone was inside, so I had to do the walk of shame to the neighbors to use their phone to call hubby.
They still don’t think I’m right in th head…
There's your silver lining!
Neighbor's don't mess with psychotic neighbors.
 
I may have you beat in the "embarrassing moments file"....

Several years ago, my husband & I had just moved into a new home that had a hot tub in the back yard. We decided to check it out after a long day of unpacking boxes. Several problems:

1. It was January in Colorado, about 10:30pm, cold, 12+" of snow on the ground.
2. I hadn't found or unpacked my bathing suit yet...I was in my birthday suit with only a bath towel. No problem, the hot tub is right by the back door.
3. We closed the house door behind us. It locked.
4. At least my husband had his terry robe & flip-flops. He "volunteered" to be the one to go meet a new neighbor, use their phone to call a locksmith to come let us it.
5. I was "stuck" in the hot tub for about an hour until the locksmith showed-up, opened the door & left. He was lonely & "chatty".

How's that for my 1st post introduction!

Shari 🌻
Hi Shari, welcome to BYC! You should make an introductory thread. We are big on meet & greets here.
 
I know! I panicked and grabbed it off the stove on my way out. And I’ve got 3-4 really good flashlights, but ended up with my sons Lilo and stitch one, a plastic thing instead of an actual light I could use, it was projecting scenes from the movie lol…I’m obviously fantastic in an emergency situation-not!
Those missing details just amplified the situation
 
I am about your height.
The trouble with pants or leggings on their own is they don’t trap warm air very well. So putting a dress on as well means the dress traps warm air and keeps your thighs warm.
Even warmer is tall men’s outer jackets. Like a dress but often with a fleece lining. And because I am short they cover the top of my legs very nicely.
I sometimes also wear silk longjohns under the pants/leggings.
And yes, I am not a fan of being cold!

The issue with the men’s outer wear is the sleeves are way too long. But I roll them back and put a stitch through the rolled but so it doesn’t come down.
i'm a shorty too. long johns are on from september to may. i have to highly recommend a heated vest. i got one as a gift and it's the best thing ever. it has a battery in the pocket and a little button on the chest with 3 heat settings. i felt compelled to tell you that. i'd love a whole heated suit. a girl can dream.
 
i'm a shorty too. long johns are on from september to may. i have to highly recommend a heated vest. i got one as a gift and it's the best thing ever. it has a battery in the pocket and a little button on the chest with 3 heat settings. i felt compelled to tell you that. i'd love a whole heated suit. a girl can dream.
I literally just got one and I am loving it!
 

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