I do like them and I think they're cute, but I don't want one anywhere near my house. The amount of damage they do to culturally historic sites is also discouraging. E.g. I learned that at Tonto National Monument their burrowing is destabilizing parts of the cliff dwellings. It really does seem that their numbers have exploded over the last few years. It used to be that I'd rarely see them, now they seem to be everywhere.
The image of the lactating squirrel up against the glass door made me laugh. Perhaps she's dreaming of a cockatiel cocktail?
I feel for your frustration over the damage they can cause. I saw damage they can do to structures at my neighbor's house (directly across the street). She had three storage sheds in her back yard and the squirrels started by excavating out the slabs below them to the point they were cracking and collapsing. The amount of soil they brought out was pretty surprising for such small creatures. It became a very serious problem when they started burrowing under the slab of her house. They damaged that too and she ended up moving away and contractors had to repair it before she could sell the house. I don't know what they did to fix it, but I'm sure it wasn't cheap. Unfortunately, that group of squirrels seems to be a constant source for squirrels emigrating to neighboring yards. Now the house two doors down has a MASSIVE colony forming in the front yard. The previous owners had jack-hammered their old driveway into large chunks and used it to make a hill in their front yard (covered with dirt). The mish-mash of huge chunks of concrete has made a perfect substrate for a burrow network and now there are multiple entrances with apparently multiple female broods living inside. We've been lucky so far. Earlier this summer we had one come in and hide in the tortoise burrows. It did some major re-arranging of the soil, but then ultimately left due to harassment by the dog and cat. I wondered at the time if it was after the tortoise eggs.
Man-o-man: talk about building a squirrel habitat! Yes, that would be just perfect for them. I would be setting traps constantly. Maybe they can "rent" a dachshund?