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I think that you need to seriously take a step back and look at your life and finances.

I think the donkey would have gone three times by now if you just gave it away.


You keep writing HUBBY in caps, like its his decision. Give the thing away while he's at work. what's he going to do...get mad at you that you now have removed the burden from your lives? you're pregnant. you have children. you're just not putting any effort into his care it sounds like. yes its not the best option to do that to someone you love but when it comes to caring for your kids or feeding the donkey which ones going to go without food for THREE DAYS? not the kids i'd hope. That donkey depends on you for it's care. Basic care ( Hooves, feed and tooth care) is not difficult to 'break' an equine to. It takes a little time and really little amounts of animal saavy. I would think that in the amount of time you've had the animal you could have gentled him at least enough to get the basics done, or minimum get him gentle enough to have him sedated for the once a year workup that he should be getting minimum. have you ever not eaten for a day? Even a quiet day with minimal walking. A donkey in a field will walk alot in a day...as browsing and foraging is in their nature and he needs the feed in order to stay healthy and in condition.

I really really am not trying to get all worked up, becauase he's not starving today. But I'd question the feed you got because I dont know many kinds of feed that would last that long ... I'm assuming he's getting grained twice a day,. A bag lasts quite a while so if you have 50 i'd be careful of spoilage. And make sure the hay is not molding... all those round bales don't stay fresh for months. I'm assuming if you cant afford feed you can't afford a vet if he colics.

And I'm going to add my .02 cents on the whole issue of budgeting.

My inlaws live with us right now. That's a house of two 50 something year olds, one out of work . My DF and I ( 25) and DF's brother who's 20 is here about 2 weeks a month as well. That is 3 people eating breakfast lunch and dinner AT HOME , two people taking lunches and eating dinner at home. 5 dogs, 6 rabbits, 40 chickens and a horse . And we do not recieve assistance. We live off of 800.00 a month. Usually including some going into savings each month. I make balanced meals, do much of my own bread making and other cooking and try to steer away from pre processed and packaged foods. I won't get rid of any animals untill we start having a hard time paying for them... I've told DF that the day we have to pick grain or dogfood over gas for the truck we're going to rehome...instead of wating till we can't feed an animal. I had to borrow 200.00 in july to euthenize a horse that broke his leg in four places. I will never again put my animals in a situation where they had to wait in pain because I had to run down the road for money. ( he wasnt waiting persay the vet had not yet arrived but still).

So it can be done. It would be nice to have medical paid as well...because DF has to have a filling done next month and we get to live off of 500 ish.
 
Its not just your DH's decision if you give the donkey away or not...
as someone else said..just DO it..LOL..
what would he do to you? I'm sure not too much!!..
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(big deal if he gets his panties in a bunch over it...)
Too bad if he dosent like it...if hes so worried about the donkey it shouldnt have gone hungry for 3 days!..
tell him THAT when he says to not give it away..
Put your big girl panties on mommy..
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Its your house too and you are capable of making decisions also...correct??
Would you rather listen to your DH and let an animal go hungry...or do the right thing for the animal? Not a tough decision IMO..

Just saying...
 
This post is just so off center. If you cannot feed the animal, the animal goes. If you have to choose between children and animals, you choose children. If you are taking food stamps you need to give up the expense of the donkey. If your husband chooses animals over children, get rid of the husband. How absolutely horrid that ANY animal goes 3 days without food. Call animal control and report yourself annonymously. For heaven sake, if you are going to be that bad off and keep animals, keep something useful like chickens and a milk goat. Somebody in this mess needs to stand up and do the right thing. Animal control will not put him down, they will re-home him.

You cannot afford this animal if you are on goverment assistance. And unless this thing drops golden eggs, its time to make it go. I have a job, so does the hubby, we are doing OK, and I don't own a horse becuase the costs is too high. Time to make the mature choices.
 
I know I might get slammed for this but.......

If you have animal that can't be cared for properly, you shouldn;t have it. If nothing else, you should have called the humane society or a rescue. Letting an animal go without food for 3 days is cruel, and probably illegal. You need to get your priorities straight. If you have any luxuries in your life at all, there is no excuse for having a starving animal. Do you pay for internet? Do you pay for a cell phone? Do you have cable or satellite service? Heck, you should let payments to credit cards, the phone bill, and any number of things go before you treat an animal cruelly by starving it. If I knew your address, I'd turn you in. Sorry. That's just the way I feel about it.
 
wish my famly could get by on 800 a month, you guys are very lucky. that would not even pay my house payment. if i was even renting a house that would not even cover one months rent! im sorry but some times it does not mater how well you can buget. i have 3 kids , work 30 hrs a week and defenatly do not have time to bake all our own bread. we have a freind living with us and 2-3 months of the year my brother stays with us. 6-7 peopl go through lots of bread. 5 nights a week im not home to make completely homemade meals, if moneys tight so what if dinner comes out of a box and takes 15 min. to make. and w/ 25,000 in medical bills we have to some how pay ontop of all our bills if we could get food stamps i would.
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yeah for food........ then maybe we would not have to eat so much ramen noodles......
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but hey they are 10 cents!
 
I'm not going to say much, because frankly the entire matter upsets me. I understand people have trouble caring for animals in these tough times, but you need to be calling a rescue.

Trying to sell the donkey is $400 is inmature and silly. There is no way your going to get that. It's starving for goodness sakes.

I had a wild donkey I rescued, and tamed. He was a sweetie and halter broke and tame. And It took me a long time just to find him a home for $100.

For the same reason you can't afford to feed the donkey other people can't either. Do the animal and yourself a favor, and give him away for FREE. I don't care what your husband thinks. Adults put animal care before their money wants. I would also throw the hay in the deal to see that he gets a home quickly. I'm sorry your having money problems. But seriously, you probably got yourself into this mess by being a gentle soul like me and feeling sorry for animals. But I think until you can afford to feed your own family, and not struggle you shouldn't be owning any pets. None.

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I will go away now before I say something offensive.
 
Hey guys, I am probably going out on a limb here, but did anyone think that the husband might be controlling? I MIGHT be wrong. If I am op, please say so. Otherwise, we were in the same situation when I was a kid. Never had money. Couldn't take care of ourselves let alone feed animals. Half the time animals went without feed unless it was a cow, or a pig. Those were the only animals that were important to my dad. Even moreso then his kids. Cheickens got to scrounge for their own feed. Our waterfowl were turned loose and left to fend for themselves half the winter. Some of them got hit in the road going to the neighbors cornfield because he refused to let us feed them. The rabbits got corn, when they were lucky enough to get it, and hay. He would sell our animals for money so he could buy booze. He did have a high paying job at the post office. My mom worked in a factory. Most of the money went for machinery that never ran, pigs, and booze. He couldn't even be bothered to make sure my mom had money to buy new shoes, let alone make sure his kids had nice new clothes. He made us starve our dogs. Would only let us give two half labs no more then a cup of dog food a dog. He also beat his kids and his wife. And had to control every little thing we did. Otherwise we'd get in trouble or beaten. One time he tricked my sister and I into selling guineas, claiming we could keep the money for our 4h projects. he hocked it for himself and used it for beer.He died in 91. Everything got better after that.

Now I am not saying the OPs husband is like that. Just taking a wild guess, because, like I said, it could be a controlling situation. Those types of situations are scarey, and oyu can't just get out of them like that.

Wanting $400 for a donkey is rediculous. They barely go for $50 when they are sold at the local farmers market and livestock auction.
 
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It still doesn't make it right. And adults can only be controlled by other adults if they let them. It sounds like somebody should have turned your parents into the humane society too. Sorry. Starving and animal is cruel and unnecessary.
 
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