Cup o' Joe and Tea Too

[CarpCharacin]

If she would have expressed pain related to losing me, it would have made me feel better. Not because I'd want to hurt a friend, even if they no longer want to be there for me, but because it'd make me feel like the loss wasn't one-sided.

 

[CarpCharacin]

You feel what you feel. Maybe you need to figure out how to flip the script in your life. What if you embraced the night time to accomplish things? For example, you brought us all through the last system upgrade, and that went smoother because you worked on it all night. You could probably even find meaningful work at night, working from home on the computer. I think a lot of websites and businesses rely on home computer users to provide technical support at night.

Maybe, but it's still not my "ideal" vision of a career. Although it would probably be better than working a night shift at a low-wage job.

 

[ValerieJ]

I really have to go or I'll miss this rain break.

Hugs to both of you!!! It's hard to lose a good friend!!!

 

[drumstick diva]

You definitely need a different psychologist - no professional would ever say that to you. She/he should be reported. No joke. I wouldn't be surprised if that person opened a window and told a patient to jump.

I out lived two psychiatrists and neither would ever treat me that way. BTW they died of different cancers not because of me.

 

[CarpCharacin]

I'm still looking for a different therapist or psychologist, one who hopefully will be better, but it's proving a little challenging to find someone who both takes the insurance and is taking new patients.

 

[drumstick diva]

James, Valerie has the right idea. You could provide computer support. That doesn't mean it's your lifetime job. Just a chance to show your skill off - of which you have many.

 

[CarpCharacin]

Maybe I'll be more able to take on new responsibilities once I am living with my dad. I used to take on more projects for sheer fun, but I still left a good amount unfinished. If I can get over this bad place that I'm in, I think I'll still try to pursue a career in research. But the sleep may still be a large obstacle, but if I had a daily routine, I think it might actually make it easier to manage.

 

[sourland]

Maybe being sleep deprived is making me extra emotional, LOL. I hope I'm not being annoying by talking about my bad experiences a lot today. I guess it was really hard to be cut out of the life of someone who I really cared about, without them showing much, if any emotion, when they used to make me feel very valued and cared about.

One thing you have to understand is that some people don't 'feel' as deeply as you. They will use you to their advantage and appear to be a friend yet not have the capacity for true friendship.

 

[CarpCharacin]

One thing you have to understand is that some people don't 'feel' as deeply as you. They will use you to their advantage and appear to be a friend yet not have the capacity for true friendship.

I think I tend to feel pretty deeply, and then I get called "too sensitive" and get told that I should try to change to feel things more shallowly.

 

[CarpCharacin]

I've always been sensitive, intense, and turbulent. I don't want to lose parts of who I am, even though they should maybe be managed in healthier ways.