Dating for Dumbies?

[Dunkopf]

Quote:
You know guys aren't all looking for Meagan Fox. You are obviously attractive or Wayne wouldn't have stuck with you for 11 years. there's a lot more to attractive than being a Ferrari. You sound like you're around 30. The fact that you have a kid is not an issue. A 30 year old woman that hasn't been married or has any kids is more of an issue for most guys.

Sounds like you need to give at least a couple years and become independent, so you know what you really want and go for it when you are ready. Grieving takes a while. Do that first then worry about a man later. A bad relationship is worse than no relationship. Beside your daughter is probably still grieving a lot too.

Good luck. You still have a lot of years ahead of you. You'll find happiness again.

 

[hikerchick]

I have decided that men are more trouble than they are worth and I am quite happy being single. I think women should strive to be happy in their own skin and create their own lives and stop worrying about finding a man. I am much happier without one. There are worse things than living alone.

 

[Spookwriter]

It's not important that he be perfect for you...
It's only important that to thineself be true...

I've never wanted my wife to change to please me. We were once young,
then middle aged. Now just two old people still in love.

And in all those years together, we've changed from who we were then to
who we are now. I never once asked her to change to please me. For then
she would no longer be herself.

So to be ourself is important--just as we are. And when we find someone
that accepts us just as we are...that's what it's all about.

I would rather happy alone that miserable in love.

 

[debilorrah]

Quote:
There any MANY worse things than living alone, and I was quite happy with myself. In an effort to get out a bit more, not looking for anything serious, just a dinner, maybe a dance, see a movie with someone I had something in common with, I was on Yahoo personals for 4 years. I found the occasional date, making clear I wanted nothing more than to get out of the house.

Then I spent 4 hours on the phone with Ken. The rest is history. After saying all that, I will have you know that I decided not to date all until my son was 16. I don't think step families are the best way to go and that is just me. It all worked out in the end!!!

 

[hikerchick]

I agree with you Debi. My daughter was 4 when my marriage ended and I concentrated on being a mom for the next 14 years. Then I did date a little but men hadn't improved in all that time and I pretty much gave it up again.

But I think women should spend less time trying to find men and more time trying to find themselves. You did that, and that is why Ken found you.

 

[debilorrah]

Quote:
I am still not sure if I have found me yet, but I DO know I take no BS from anyone.

 

[Chickerdoodle13]

I don't have much advice, but I do find that guys are MUCH more attracted to girls comfortable with themselves, especially if they are comfortable enough to enjoy being single. It's the same for me. I definitely find confidence very attractive!

Just push her to do activities she enjoys doing as that will help her to heal from the last guy. Once she is good and ready, she will find someone! Sometimes it's better to be single than it is to jump into another relationship with someone else. That can just lead to a lot of emotional strife!

 

[debilorrah]

Quote:
You are so RIGHT!!! This even applies to those of us that are not skinny and wear a size 4. Feel good in your own skin and you are attractive to others.

 

[Dipsy Doodle Doo]

Hi! How about "Life For Dummies"?

Lisa

 

[redhen]

Quote:
Honey, if you were here, I would shake you and then hug you! Wayne was attracted to you, wasn't he? So you're attractive! And in a few months or a year, when you feel like it, you'll go out to animal shows or whatever activities you like, and run into some more men with good taste.

Gahhh! She drives me NUTS when she says shes not attractive...
She IS attractive... she needs a little kick in the tush..