Disrespectful or not?

[Chicken Boo]

You can question authority with respect.

Teachers deserve respect when they walk into the classroom on the first day. Teachers have the greatest responsibility, producing educated good citizens. However, students deserve respect just because they are human beings, as well. There seems be a degradation of that principle.

 

[redhen]

I try to teach my teen foster children that they CAN disagree with me..
BUT, there IS also a proper, time, place and WAY..to disagree with me.
Just like he'd have to learn to shut his mouth in the REAL world if he ever came across any police..(for whatever reason..) OR a boss at a job that he disagreed with (havent we all been there?)...
Lets face it..we ALL have had to learn to just simply shut our mouths in certain circumstances...If you run your mouth ,or mutter under your breath and correct your boss in front of your co-workers..you'll be fired..Period. THen whos going to pay your mortgage or car payment??
So..some may say.."let them express their feelings/thoughts..it teaches them to think for themselves.."..but in the REAL world..that wont put food on your table or keep you out of jail..now will it? just my opinion.. People that let their kids run off at their mouths..are only hurting their children in the long run for when they hit the sad/hard/ real world... (NOT referring to the OP!!! OR anyone else..I'm just giving my personal opinion..)

 

[hikerchick]

If my boss is wrong, I say so. I would not work for someone who could not handle that. I have quit jobs for that reason. I won't work for someone whose ego is so enormous that they will fire you for correcting them. Sorry if you think I am doing my daughter a disservice, but I want her to be the same way. I don't want her to be a sheep just goosestepping along because she was told to. She needs to be able to think for herself and stand up for what is right. If more people did that the world would be a better place. Most people just go along with whoever is in charge and don't think about what they are doing. Just because someone is your boss/teacher/parent does NOT make them more capable of thinking than you are. It does not make them automatically right under all circumstances. To teach children that they are is just wrong.

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

Quote:
I will disagree. The phrasing the teacher used WAS idotic and confusing. Quite frankly, using that kind of phrasing would make me, as a parent, question her math abilities, and certainly her teaching abilities.

Math itself has very specific "grammar" rules You can't write the numbers and symbols any which way or order and have your equation mean what you desire; likewise, English grammar has rules that need to be followed for accurate coimmunication.

Respect for an individual is an opinion something that is earned. Displaying respect for a person has no bearing on your personal opinion of them; it is good manners. Correcting the teacher is not in and of itself disrespectful; however the time and manner in which it is done could be, and even if the time and manner had been better chosen, the teacher might not have thought so.

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

Quote:
Confronting others is not a neccessary outcome of thinking for oneself. oing along with the one who is in charge does not mean someone can't think for themselves; it often means that they agree with them.

 

[Bluegem]

Some people (myself included) just open their mouths and let the words tumble out before thinking that someone could find them disrespectful or offensive. I remember correcting teachers as early as the 1st grade I never did it out of disrespect it was just that they were wrong and I knew it so I said so. I never got into trouble for speaking my mind and if someone wants to correct me infront of others whether I'm their elder or their boss then so be it, I like to know when I'm wrong.

Not all authority figures deserve to be respected, there was a local policeman a few years back (whoes favourite targets were young drivers) that would pull people over just because he could and find some way to harass them whether it was kicking their car or insulting the driver until they broke down in tears. If they had of kept their mouths shut and just accepted that he was their superior and therefor must be right he would probably still be here making our little town a worse place.

Why should those that have no respect for others be respected?

 

[miss_jayne]

because it is their POSITION that deserves respect. it is how you deal with it that matters. having self control is what is important. it doesn't mean the person can CONTINUE to do things incorrectly. the person is in their position for a reason. respect it. you have to follow protocol.

a child should not correct an adult. period. they can question WHY something is not right, or that there is a difference of opinion respectfully. there is a time and place. DEMEANING someone to 'prove' someone is 'right or wrong' is about EGO and not about being correct or incorrect. ego and honor are two different things.

i choose honor and respect over ego any day.

i think what more people REALLY want is to be RIGHT....those are the people that stand around arguing at every family function using the WORST platform for their basis and could NEVER make it to the debate team. they criticize the PERSON and not the topic. it's PERSONAL and not about the issue.

just because the person doesn't DESERVE to be in position, office, front of the desk, etc, it doesn't matter. until the right channels are followed show YOURSELF some respect and make an elegant example to others on the way. pretty is as pretty does, and it can be pretty POWERFUL as well. power is not always in a power play. that is called THROWING A FIT and being a bully to prove a point.

a point can be argued to death. there are always going to be extreme cases. but in most situations, there is no reason to correct someone publicly. i agree with the others who said that we should as parents be communicating with the teacher, not the child in this case. in the form of a NICE question too would be great. instead of cornering them, giving them the opportunity to explain rather to defend.

 

[Camelot Farms]

Throwing another wrench into things...I am wondering also if one of the reasons that DS felt that he 'could' correct her is that this teacher happens to be 23.

Not that this makes it right of course, but he has never done this to any of his other teachers who all happen to be 30's plus.

There have been lots of great posts on this thread about respecting adults which made me wonder if in this particular instance...were his boundaries blurred by the fact that this teacher is not that much older than he is....again...not saying that this makes it right or permissable, just wondering in his mind if that was a difference in boundaries?

 

[miss_jayne]

totally possible. considering that even the medical society is concerned that one of the issues we are having as a nation as that we have no age differences any longer.

8 yr old girls and 30 yr old girls now dress and speak the same. everyone wants to look the same target age of 18 and stay that way. it's all blurred together. look at the clothing. hold up a bathing suit from either dept and see if you can tell it apart.

 

[Camelot Farms]

Exactly Ms. Jayne.

I have the worst time finding clothes for DD (age 8) that dont make her look like a 'hoochie mama' in her brothers words...lol.

And an even harder time explaining why she cant wear what so many of her peers are wearing....

By the time she's a teenager, I will have lost my mind...lol. Give me strength!