my sister and her husband did the mutually agreed upon thing. bought the ring together, agreed not to tell anyone until he proposed officially, and then waited and waited - she couldn't really start making plans until he proposed and she couldn't really say ok get on with it - and waited. So they booked a romantic weekend in Monterey, and she thought this is it. They went for a romantic moonlit walk on the beach on their last night, and she thought this is it . .. later that evening when she was taking a bath in the hotel room he came in and got on one knee. She said yes, but later she had to ask "why in the bathroom? why not out on the beach in the moonlight?" he admited that that was what he had in mind, but had forgot the ring back in the room! lol!
When I got engaged I knew it was coming, we had been together for 10 years and I had picked out the room. I found it in his room before we went to visit his family in Puerto Rico.
To make a long story short, he forgot the ring at home and he bought a temporary one in Puerto Rico. He was going to propose on a mountain cliff as the sunset, but we didn't make it there.
We fell off a cliff (pushed by waves) and spent Christmas day in the emergency room. Most horrifiying experience of my life. That night we ended up staying at his aunt's house (as we could barely move) and he proposed in bed.
We're busy busy busy with:
* planning a wedding that nobody knows about
* making plans for a honeymoon that will happen after a wedding for which there has yet to be an official proposal
* registering for a few things (we don't need much, really)
* figuring out frequent flyer plans so that we can have a honeymoon
* vaguely calling in favors (some people have had to be told) for a photographer, hotel connections in Hawai'i, asking friends if they'd do decorations
* trying to determine if my dad will swing for a caterer so we don't have to deal with a big BBQ
Whew! Thank goodness I was an event planner in a previous life.