Facebook--pros and cons

[Reinbeau]

Facebook is whatever you want it to be for yourself. It isn't something you need to 'keep up' with, it isn't about accepting every friend request that comes your way (I get many, because I used to play the games, from people who I don't know, I don't accept them - they usually don't notice, because they 'friend' anyone who plays a game they need neighbors in). I agree the games are a waste of time, I got sucked into them for awhile - stay away from them, you've been warned!

The privacy controls are key, you can set up lists and control who sees what via those lists. Facebook is where I let loose and be as political as I want (those of you who are my friends know that). It also lets people share photos and events you wouldn't know about otherwise. I enjoy it very much.

 

[pdsavage]

I tried it but found it boring and over rated,most my family I don't talk to anyway.
I only got it to talk to my long lost nephew.
If I have something to say to someone I will say it in person....
Most people think im crazy and find my ideas go against the norm.Its like being a round ball in a room full of blocks.

 

[chickensioux]

I enjoy facebook. I am in touch with old high school friends and a lot of my family. I love to play scrabble with my brother. I have found if you mind your own business, post only good things, facebook is fun.
I stay away from most of the applications, farmville, games, etc. Scrabble is the only app I do. I got a virus on my computer when playing the facebook games ( according to the geek squad guy that came to fix it).
I don't divulge any personal info either. Other than that, I enjoy it.

 

[beakkeeper]

Wow, thanks for all the input! My big concerns are spending too much time on it and feeling obligated to spend time "talking" to people just because I know them. I'd only friend people that i talk to on a regular basis.

FYI, when I talked about "lost relationships" I was talking about an incident where my cousin left her friend group because they had all been talking about her/ignoring her purposefully. I do think though that people do put waaaaaaaay too much stock into their lives on fb. And they'll build up a persona that is not really them.

So, when you set your privacy controls, can you set it up so that your info is only available to people that you have friended?

 

[The Chicken Lady]

Quote:
Terrie's list is the same as mine would be.

 

[SilverPhoenix]

I think it's a good tool to keep in contact with people you might not stay in contact with otherwise, and as long as you use discretion in what you post you ought to be fine.

It's definitely not my favorite site, and I only check it periodically, but it does have its uses. It's great for organizing events, letting people know where you are and what you're up to (assuming you want them to know that), and knowing what's going on in your social circle.

 

[Tala]

Quote:
You can set it to "everyone" or "friends of friends" or "friends only" or "yourself only"
You can also set it to one of the above and add an exception list.

Most of my things are friends only now (I used to not mind "friends of friends" seeing stuff, especially back in highschool when "everyone" was doing the same thing - more of a horizontal playing field, no bosses back then, just for example) but I also have an EXCEPT list, that includes a few of those noted "loose lips" - so we are friended and I can see what they are up to and/or chat with them if I want to, but they don't automatically get my posts anymore.

 

[kimbalaya]

Quote:
Yes.

And, you can also set it so that people who aren't your friends can't even request that you be their friend if you want, thus canceling the need to keep up with fifty friend requests every day. You can set it so people that aren't your friends can't message you. You can set your Wall (where things are posted that appear on your profile) is even blocked from even your friends writing on it if you want. You can set your wall so that even if you do allow friends to post on it, none of your other friends can see it, and only the friend that wrote it can see it.

There's all kinds of customization you can do with who can see things on your profile or not. I play 2 games regularly - Scrabble and Happy Pets. I play Family Feud and Bejeweled Blitz once in a while. I know that my 880+ friends don't ALL play those games. (And before you ask, no, those friends aren't all strangers. I have about 15 people that I met on Facebook through one game or another before I deleted all my apps recently, the other 860+ friends are people I know (or have known) in real life or on forums like the BYC. I don't have any BYCers on my FB yet because I'm fairly new here and haven't really made friends I guess you could say. But the other forums I've been a part of, some since 1999, I have friends on FB now too.) Anyway, I have a friend "list" that is specifically the friends that play Happy Pets, or Bejeweled Blitz, or Family Feud, etc. Then if I have something I'm going to post to my wall ("Click my basket!" "Adopt this pet!" type stuff), before I post it, I click on the button to customize who can see THAT POST, and select that ONLY SPECIFIC people can see it, and choose my Happy Pets (or other appropriate) list. Then if it's someone who doesn't play that game, they don't even have to see my post about it!

By the way...

Hi! My name is Kimberly, and I'm a Facebook Addict!

 

[savingdogs]

I love Facebook and so does my hubby, but it has limitations and, in my opinion, rules for us.

Like others have said, don't put anything up there you would not want everyone to know. I like to look at is as a giant room all these people are in, listening to each other's conversations. You may not find all of them very interesting, but scrolling is easy! Easier than walking away politely at a party when the vacation pictures get boring.

But I do find the picture sharing and the games fun. I was loving Farmville for awhile but it has now gotten a little boring and I'm playing Frontierville more. Bejeweled Blitz is fun.

I am hard of hearing and found FB to be a great way to communicate with people because I'm not good at texting.

And finally, both my husband and I have been able to find friends and family that we thought were "long lost" that we had somehow lost contact with but never stopped caring about. We have been able to even discover one lives right in our area (even though we moved 1,000 miles away from our mutual home town) and another old friend and his wife are moving to our area shortly. I would never have known any of that without Facebook.
It also helps you remember birthdays, plan events and show off pictures of whatever has been interesting to you.

If you don't find your "friends" interesting, you can either just scroll past their posts or unfriend them. I find it really a great way to stay in touch. Used correctly, the only "con" for us has been that it takes up a lot of time. But since we are enjoying ourselves, what harm is there in that?

 

[chicken_china_mom]

I truly do enjoy using Facebook. It has helped me to reconnect with people that I lost touch with years ago, as well as to connect with my vast extended family (we're Irish, need I say more? Lol!). On my FB, I have maybe 160 people. Not nearly as many as some of my friends, and there's a reason for that. Everyone on my FB page is either someone I know personally by relation, I went to school with them, I worked with them (just one girl), or they are a BYC friend. I absolutely DO NOT friend strangers. I'm just not comfortable with it. I have made friends with some friends of people that I am friends of. Thanks to FB I was able to reconnect with my friends from the first grade school I attended. One girl, Marilyn, she moved with her family in 2nd grade to South America, but I never forgot her, and surprisingly, she never forgot me either! She is a beautiful woman, just had her first baby, and is a devout animal rights activist, and she is wonderful to know again. I have family that doesn't like to talk on the phone, so FB is basically the only way to get to talk to them. Then there is also the fact that my phone is a pay as you go phone. I do not ever get free minutes or texting. I get charged 24 hrs a day, 7 days a week for minutes and texting, so I try to save my minutes for if the kids need me, or an emergency. When I can finally get a house phone again, THEN I'll be able to call my friends more and talk. But for now they understand and they know they can always leave me a message on FB if they really want to.

That said, I do use the privacy setting. I have it set to friends only. My children's father and I have been split for 6 years now, and I refuse to add him. So I was able to go into my account and arrange it so that he and his girlfriend are on ignore. Neither of them can see what I post, nor can they add me as a friend. My ex and I share one mutual friend, and I don't want my ex to spy on me through that friend's page. He would do it and try to use anything possible against me, and I won't permit it. Why not delete that friend? Because his wife was my best friend, and she died last January, and I adore his kids as if they were my own niece and nephews, and to cut him off on FB would be to cut the kids out of my life as well, and I will not do it. So, the ignore feature works quite nicely.

I was unaware of the extent of the FB privacy features. My mother has a FB page and she doesn't play games like Farmville or Frontierville, and she hates seeing those posts pop up in her newsfeed, so I'll see about blocking those from her view so she isn't contantly annoyed by them.

I too have a cousin that "likes" everything. She drives me nuts sometimes. She has to have hundreds of those "like" pages on her profile. I just scroll right past most of what she "likes"

I like FB for the most part. I'm talking to old friends and I made friends with people that I had known of in high school, but had never really been friends with. Now, we are friends, and they are wonderful people.

Also, I moved far away from my family, so some people I would never get to talk to otherwise. I suggest you try FB for yourself. Give it a few weeks to see if you like it. And if you want to know if real people are trying to befriend you instead of people that just befriend everyone, then tweak your name some. Only give your proper FB name to people you really want as friends on there and tell them to add you. If they add you, you can usually distinguish them from the posers. But it really is a nice socializing network.