Facebook rant

[luvinmychickens]

I'm so sorry... It's not funny at all..

 

[they'reHISchickens]

FB, like any other computer app, must be taken with caution. I have a public and a private FB ( yeah, against their rules.) My public one is used via work and has work friends. My private is only family-- it's the way my farflung kids communicate but they are all rather careful in its use.
Sounds to me like your friend is not a friend, only a person strung out on drugs and in her own world. Ignore her totally. You are not obligated to befriend anyone in this world who is unhealthy for you physically or mentally including family.
Having children is one of those things that is intensely personal and for whatever reason you have/not have them, is none of anyone's business. More likely scenario if that woman is indeed so strung out, her child will go thru withdrawal at birth, child services will enter the picture and they will lose their welfare ticket and the baby placed in a safer home. Let's pray for the baby. And **hugs** to the OP. Life sucks sometimes:/

 

[TinyChickenLady]

Quote:
I would except for the fact that I really do have family in Florida and Kentucky that I love dearly. They don't have cell phones so long distance calling isn't an option.

Same here, I have great uncles and aunts and elderly aunts and uncles and extended family members that can not afford keep calling long distance and internet is the best thing for them to keep in touch with all the family members. So FB has their reasons of how we keep in touch with love ones. The good has to outweigh the bad. If it is too bad that they drag you down or make you depressed, don't sign up.

Even BYC site is like FB but the mods are very strict on how we behave and what it is allowed. You should do the same for your own FB and if you like BYC rules, apply them for your FB too!

I think this is how I'm going to start using my FB. It's going to be just like BYC. I think how this site is run.

Thank you luvinmychickens and they'reHISchickens. Your support is so appreciated and you are right about the baby. That's what I'm afraid of. The poor thing will be born an addict and go through the worst ordeal of it's life all due to petty teenage selfishness

 

[CluckyJay]

Tell her I said thank you for putting my husband and those like him in the position to pay for her future kids.

 

[MaryMouse]

Face book is not good. I shun it.

As fars as making fun of anyone for something they cant help,thats lower than low. When people do this it like lowers my opinion of them greatly. This includes things like cross eyes, hairlips, weight issues, stutters, lisps, medical issues, etc. I think you get the point. No one is more aware of their own issues than yourself. Rubbing it in someones face is just so very low.

I judge people only on how they treat me, I really dont care about the rest. Face book inables people just yet another avenue to practice their mean ways.

 

[Carols Clucks]

I am sorry your feelings were hurt by her comments, bet hers were hurt by other peoples comments and that is how she decided to respond.


Me....I would have replied with something like

"As you know, it is so hard knowing that carrying a child will be difficult for me do to a medical condition, but that is why I think it is important to wait until the right time in time, when homes are stable and happy to bring in such a wonderful gift to your world"

Kind of shines the spotlight of ugliness right back on her.

 

[JenBirdRansom]

I know a lot of people don't like Facebook and I know there are basically 2 generations that LIVE by Facebook. It can be a great tool for "social networking" for jobs prospects and travel. It can also be a place where you can gather information about your hobbies and interests by "liking" pages (not people) that interest you. You can get some exclusive coupons and have close contact with business owners of companies and/or products. My farm has a facebook page and my friends LOVE it!! They hear about all the silly things going on around here. And I enjoy updating it with the things that make me laugh.

Now as far as my "personal" page...that is a tight ship. If I don't know someone in real life (and it can be hard to convince some 20 year olds that there is such a thing as real life) then they aren't part of my group of friends. No "friends of friends" or people you knew in school. None of the apps or games or any of that mindless entertainment. Fine for others, useless for me. I won’t say anything on there that I wouldn't say right to someone's face and of course try to be positive and not a dumping ground for negativity.

Having moved here to WA from Wisconsin I have friends stretched out all over the place. I also know quite a few military families with kids similar ages as my kids and we can all keep in touch even as they move from Texas to California to Germany. My brother lost his home and moved with his wife and 3 kids to Nicaragua and I was able to see his adventure and then of course Skype with him.

So overall with a sensible approach it can be a great way to see what your friends and family are up to all at the same time. My MIL had my oldest daughter all to herself (as a grandparent and living so close…very close) so when we moved out here she was heartbroken! Being able to see what my daughter is up to on a somewhat daily basis, plus hear about her report cards and piano lessons is priceless to her. Then she calls and talks to my daughter and they can talk about what is going on. I get tons of info about Organic living, Health info and the current fight against Big Ag.

You can find my farm page by a search, but my personal page is completely 100% impossible to find in a search of any kind.

Anyway, I think Facebook is really a good thing for people who have the restraint to not allow the drama and negatively in. If you worry about what someone will think if you friend or unfriend someone or if you talk to someone and another person finds out what you said, or if you get involved with the childish nonsense and nasty games then you’re bound to be hurt by it. The way I see it: You choose what to expose yourself to. You have to be responsible for what you let into your life. As soon as you said you knew someone that was a homeless drug dealer and they wanted to have a baby….right there is your trouble. You don’t need to know what they are doing. It only brings frustration and negativity into your life and is toxic for your heart and mind.

Sorry for such a long post. I have pretty strong feelings about Facebook as I think a lot of people (of all ages) complain about it but are unwilling to take control of their “Facebook llife”. I’m not saying that is your case….just saying I see it often enough to believe it’s a tragic pattern of behavior in real life and Facebook life and quite frankly, it’s sad.
I wish you only the best and I sincerely hope that you will find strength to create the kind of change in your life that will bring people closer to you who deserve to be there and the strength to quietly remove the people who are a source of negativity….in facebook and in life. You deserve only the best things!

 

[cassie]

The smartest thing you can do is to cut that person out of your life. Completely. Now. No email, no phone calls, nothing. Do not respond in any way to anything she says. If she acccosts you on the street, walk away. If she appears on your doorstep do not let her in. Tell her she is not welcome and that if she doesn't leave you are calling the cops. Shut and lock the door. If she threatens you physically, you need to report it to the police. Ban her from your facebook page, too. Personally, I avoid facebook like the plague, but that's me.

 

[Dar]

FB is what you make of it.... if you allow the bad to access you then you will have a bad experience with it..

but for me...

FB has introduced me to a cousin I never knew. (my dads brothers daughter).. he mother took off to the other end of the country when she was little and he dad could not find her

it has allowed me to find my sons father after he took off when I was pregnant and he was finally served with child support papers after 18 yrs (he was ordered to pay support 18 yrs ago and never manned up and fled.. courts have now served him notice with back support) sweet justice

it has allowed me to communicate with friends who went to Thailand 4 years ago to teach english and then with the political unrest it allowed us to keep contact while she was fleeing to Taiwan.. over there internet signals are easier to get then a telephone.

as does anything in life FB comes with drama... I know of 4 divorces that FB has caused.. I also know of lives that have been saved because of FB.. its a great resource to get the word about about organ and marrow donations. fundraising events ect...

you cant allow the drama to come into your life... the delete / unfriend button works great!

 

[TinyChickenLady]

Well just an update. That girl and a friend decided to make things worse by also harrassing and making fun of me on a relative's page as well. It got so bad with the threats and harrassment that we had to threaten to call the cops.

The relative and I have both delted and blocked both girls and after we threatened with the police, they stopped for the most part. I don't count their own status updates that they kept up with because it's their own FB and they can do as they please with it.

The friend found a mutual friend in the next town over and threatened my relative and her brother for standing up for me.

Anyway, it got complicated and mouthy and just plain horrible (i.e. "Why don't you go have a baby... oh wait HAHAHA YOU CAN"T!").

So last night after I got home from work, I went through my entire friends list and deleted EVERYONE that I don't know or like. I kept my BYC buddies on there and all relatives (for now LoL). I think I've weeded out all the bad seeds so we'll see how it goes from there. Along with the deletes, I've also blocked 3 people (all for different reasons).

I feel better now