Funny Expresions?

[charmed one]

I forgot a couple...Busier than a one-armed paper hanger and The lights is on but nobodys home! One card short of a deck..

 

[mamagardener]

How about,
he/(she)'s not the sharpest tool in the shed.
or
smooth move, exlax!
my father used to always say,
"go pound sand" instead of swearing.

 

[ksacres]

I always say: good dill, pickle!

 

[charmed one]

Geez Louise!

 

[luvchicks8]

If my kids are driving me mad I say cut your butt off.

But then again if the lights are on I say cut the lights off.

 

[ams3651]

my gram says "Jesus mother Mary and Joseph" instead of swearing. Took me years and years to understand what she was saying because she says it like one word. When we would talk to much at supper she would say "every time a sheep baahs it looses a mouthful". I refer to someone less than intelligent as a few fries short of a happy meal.

 

[LarryPQ]

good golly lollypops!

CHEESEBALLS!

other meffin monkey sucking sanctamonious cat licking toe jam growing asdlfkfjweoimwinfi.....and then I trail off into unintelligble grumbles.

Once, 6+ months ago, I hurt myself while at the DS's swim lessons. Said "SOB", only the longer version. Now EVERYDAY, for 6+ months, he'll tell everyone who isn't paying attention to him that "MOMMY SAID 'sonofa@#@!' AT SWIMLESSIONS! She's bad and I gotta wash her mouth out with soap."

SO, now I say cheeseballs.

 

[country freedom]

Butterfly kisses
Hershey candy
Fudge bar
Purple flower
Puppies and kittens

Anything that will make people think of good thoughts INSTEAD of those nasty, negative thoughts after people voice out.

It also takes some thinking on your part to think of something nice before saying something not so nice.

 

[Ec_Prokta]

My brother keeps saying "Give the credit to the team".

 

[debilorrah]

scared the peewaddin outta me.