As you are aware I lost my mother in February (and you guys really have helped me with the grief that I felt at that) now the people I work with are nagging at me its time for me to start dating, get married. My supervisor's wife is the worst for that and it gets to me sometime I want to just relax get the house sorted out (it started out as just decorating but I am gutting the house and replacing everything). So just let me relax enjoy being alone and if I meet someone I meet someone stop trying to set me up with people!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have never understood why married people think they need to force it on to other people.. I get by single just fine an am in no hurry to change that.
My family is doing the same thing. I've been with the same guy for 5 years and am graduating college in May. All my older cousins are on their second babies, where most will stop. I'm the oldest of the youngest cousins, so everyone keeps asking when I'm getting married and having babies.
I didn't marry til I was 33, DH was 37 it was a first marriage for both of us. I didn't date as a teenager, my parents thought I was gay but they didn't tell me this until after I had my daughter. By the time I was married my brother was on his fifth marriage, before I got married I used to say that he was getting married enough for the both of us. Needless to say I have been happily married for almost nine years...Moral of story, get married when your ready not when everyone else wants you too.
Well, now that I am over 50 nobody bothers me anymore to get married and have kids It seems very innapropriate for your supervisor's wife to be involved in your private life. Can you have a word with him about your discomfort on the subject?
You might just give them the old Ann Landers quote. "It is better to be single than wish you were". When I was a young married, my husband and I made the decision not to have children. I noticed that the people that were the least comfortable in their own role of being parents were the ones that nagged the loudest about why we ought to have kids. The couples that seemed the most content and comfortable being parents didn't seem to care one way or the other about whether we had kids or not. I wonder if it may be the same with those that keep trying to hook you upeven though you arenot interested.
My DH and I waited and waited before we got married. We wanted to be sure that is was what we wanted, not the family, not the neighbours, not our friends. It's a really big step, promising before God and the world to stay together, stay faithful to each other, love and respect each other for as long as you have. Which could be many years. By the time my grandmother passed my grandparents were married 56 years. Marriage should not be taken lightly and no-one should be told they have to get married or they should get married. Even if you meet your soulmate and know you are with a person you could be with for the rest of your life, it's still your decision. As is having children. It's a very personal decision and should be treated as such. To the OP: I'm sorry to hear about your mother. Enjoy your house renovation and live your life the way you want to, it's yours. Do what you want, when you're ready. When the right person comes along you and you decide to get married, do so then. And I hope you will be very, very happy.
There is also the simple fact that some people should just not be married. People marry and stay together for a variety of reasons, some stay married to a particular person that will allow bad behavior because that person continues to take them back under the guise of love when in reality it may be for possible embarrassment in the company of freinds, relatives or peers in the workplace, insecurity or even ignorance of what a real loving marriage is. Then again if there is happiness whether it is an illusion or real I cannot tell them different they are the ones living the illusion and are the same person that must come to reality. OP, make darn sure you are ready and for the right person for the right reasons... don't do it for the safe choice... I have seen what that produces.
