Having a only child??????Help

[Cabe]

Everyone is different, but my husband is an only child and has always wished he had a brother or sister. I think that he misses someone to have spent his childhood with. Someone to share all his childhood memories with. I on the other hand am 1 of 5 children. so, i just know having brothers and a sister. Needless to say we have 2 boys. Children are always a blessing. That being said, 2 is plenty for me.

 

[herefordlovinglady]

I am the youngest of 3 girls. my two sisters are over 7 years older. as far as i am concerned, i grew up as an only child. now later in life the age gap makes no difference. but when i was younger, it was only me, they were too old to play with me when i was growing up and when it came my time to start dating they were married. so until i was about 30 did i feel really like had my sisters as friends. I guess what i am saying is, even though i had sisters, i still grew up as an only child. Don't get me wrong, i love them dearly now, but then they were just my older sisters.

 

[WriterofWords]

Steven is an only child. He graduated high school last night, he's in the Army Reserves, and he's a pretty well adjusted child if I may say so. I was told I was never have children, he is my miracle, he was born way early. I wondered about him being an only child, but he says he was happy and still is and feels he didn't miss out on anything. I had a niece and a nephew he spent time with, but out here where we live he couldn't just walk to a friends house or something,, also I've been a single mom his entire life, I guess it depends on you and how you feel about it.

 

[teach1rusl]

I only have one child. I'm especially thankful of that now that he's 17...lol. Seriously though, I've enjoyed being able to spend so much of my time with him through the years, and I'll actually be able to help him out with college expenses, since I only have one. I grew up with three brothers, and with mom working, she really didn't have much time to spend with us as we growing up (not her fault...just how it was). My ex (my son's father) eventually had more children later on, and although my son does okay with them now (their oldest is 8), he is not close to them... I think due mostly to the age difference, but maybe jealousy issues as well. Maybe if he'd been a girl, he would have "mommied" the little ones and gotten closer to them???
Good luck with your decision. I wish you LOTS of energy if you decide to venture down that path again!

 

[schellie69]

Quote:
My first pregnancy was very hard and I was terrified to have another God took care of that i got pregnant while on the pill and 2nd daughter was born healthy 9 months later. My DD oldest pregnancy was hard morning sickness all day long for the whole pregnancy bed rest high blood pressure she was so swollen she looked like a blown up blue berry her second pregnancy which came when her daughter was 4 months old so her girls are 13 months apart her 2nd pregnancy was a breeze no morning seconds blood pressure fine she had her only a few days early so each pregnancy is different if you both want another child then try talk to your doctor and make sure you have no underlying problems and then go for it. I had 3 children naturally and we adopted one so we have 4 great kids and 2 very sweet grand daughters. now with foster care they usually pay you to take care of the child/children and you are the first they ask if you want to adopt I was going to do foster care until my health took a nose dive I was told I had Fibormaylgia and spinal arthritis and arthritis in both hips so now I am helping raise my grand babies I am sure if you want a another child then you should try. good luck and will put you in my prayers.

 

[Whispering Winds]

The only reason I have againest an only child is the fact when the parents die, he/she is all alone, no one to share the memories and the grief with. I had three older siblings, a LOT older than me, mom was 45 and dad was 50 when I was born, and by the time I was 8 I was essentially an only child. It had its positives and negatives, but I don't know if I would try for a second baby if my health was severely compromised the first go round. Then, on the other hand, I also know women who had horrific first pregnancies, and the next baby was a piece of cake. . .hard decision. Glad i don't have to make that decision anymore.

 

[cheri222]

I am new to chickens and have never posted anything. But this is something I know about. We can't have children and have adopted. We adopted our 10 yo at 3 days old. Best boy any mother could wish for. Our 2nd adoption failed. I was the birth coach and we had the baby for 3 months till dad found out he could get welfare (abandoned the boy at 4 yr old) It was like having a child die. Many states allow months... for birth parents to change their mind. Not only does it break your heart, you are out all the money. We tried foster adopt, some very ill children and states can still give the child to the birth parents or drag it out for years. Our 3rd adoption we decided to go foreign so no taking back of the child. We have been home 1 year with our little boy from China. Ours is not the norm but there are some really bad cases out there. Our son was beaten, cut, starved and tied down. We realized while in China that there were big issues but how could we leave him in that situation to possibly die(heart condition and cleft lip and palate). He weighed 27lbs at 4.5 yrs old and wore 24 month clothes. Very smart and mastered english in 3 months, but emotionally 2 and very aggressive. We will work with this for many years, very traumatic to our family. But in the end worth it. Money wise --selling chicken eggs will be my retirement!!!! How many do you think we will need? Seriously wanted chickens forever and just told hubby its a "bonding experience" for all of us. We are all working on the coop together and getting the chickens in June. Im just saying adoption isn't always an easy answere.

 

[sourland]

Jamie, I think the reason he is leaving the final decision up to you is because you have to do the hard part (and in your case maybe the risky part). We guys have the easy and I must add fun part. I have two older sisters. One 13 years older and one 9 years older. Basically I grew up like an only child- but that was OK. My wife has a sister who is 14 months older than her. They are extremely close; therefore, we had our children close together (19 months apart.) Although they love one another, they are not close. Guess what I am trying to say is that it will work out regardless of what you choose to do. If you want a child for you, go for it.

 

[tobin123]

You guys are great,my mind is always going crazy til we reach our final decision.It would be nice if I was to wake up and just start feeling pregnant,that is how I knew whith Zachary(we had to use clomid but that day I felt something different plus I couldn't zip my pants)We need to decide in the mean time keep the wonderful comments coming,.

 

[patnjess]

well I have tons so I'm no help.

but i will tell you this....with my 2nd I was sick, critically so....My heart was bad, I had to be on all sorts of heart meds and where a constant monitor, and still spent a bunch of time in the hospital. They said my body can't take the stress of pregnancy. I didn't listen, and had 3 healthy pregnancys later.