heartbreaking when children go astray

[Feathered Wings]

Quote:
I agree so much with this I was the preachers daughter and it wasn't a pleasant upbringing. I was constantly bombarded with if you do this or that you are going to hell.
Being terrified as a child to so much as Fib or the devil would get me I had nightmares as a child. When I became and adult and married I chose my own path, I still firmly believe in God but not the vengeful God I was raised to believe would take my life if I did this or that.
I did not bring my children up the way I was raised but they also know God and have been taught right from wrong. They do not fear God but know him as the Great one that created them and loves them and is always there to lead, guide and help them if they need him.
Love your daughter as she is and be thankful she wishes to continue to have a relationship despite the difference in beliefs. The greatest gift we can give each other is to love one another unconditionally.

 

[deb1]

We have to remember that we have no idea what Jeucamom's daughter is doing that is upsetting her mom.

The Original poster did say that most of us would not consider what her daughter's actions wrong. That could mean that Jeacamom has such a low opinion of everyone's morals that she thinks that we would consider even obviously dangerous acts-like doing drugs-to be all right. Or she could mean that her daughter is doing something that really is only a sin in a small percentage of other's eyes. (I know some people who don't think that girls should leave home to go to college, for example. )

Its why I keep asking if the daughter's actions are physically harmful to herself or others. Is she doing something physically dangerous, Jeaucamom?

No matter what the young lady is doing-or even if I would not consider it wrong- I do feel for the mother's emotional distress and I hope that she and her daughter discover some way to relieve the concern Jeaucamom is feeling.

 

[jeaucamom]

I think that in my emotional state, I am not communicating very well for one thing and for another, I am trying to dance around the subject out of respect and love for my daughter. I am NOT shoving my religious beliefs on my daughter. She is shoving her non religious ones on me and when I won't "participate" or be drug into the drama, I am the one who gets blamed and verbally and emotionally attacked. Her actions could very well lead to things that are physically dangerous to herself or others, but to the best of my knowledge they are not at this point.

I humbly disagree with the poster who said if you love someone you respect their beliefs. That is only true to a point and definitely depends on the nature of the relationship and the nature of the belief. If you love someone you won't sit idly by while they destroy their lives or the lives of those you love, just because you respect their beliefs. There does come a point where no more can or should be done, but before that I believe you have an obligation to intervene based on your love for them.

And once again, I love my daughter beyond words and this is not just a disagreement. I love many people with whom I disagree. And I will love my daughter to the ends of time regardless of the outcome.

 

[silkiechicken]

Closed by OPs request.