Hey any Gay members?????

[Laurajean]

mom'sfolly :

Lordy folks...this guy is asking a legitimate question...

I grew up in a small town. I suspect we always had gay residents, and we had plenty of un-married couples, but I still remember when the first black family moved to town. It was big news. For many LGBT folks, moving to a small town or rural area is exactly the same. They ain't never had none of that 'round there. The people get treated differently because they are DIFFERENT and NEW. In fact, in many small towns, it takes a generation or more for the new to wear off.

I don't really have any suggestions for the OP besides be yourself, don't deliberately isolate yourself, but don't also put yourself in situations that make you uncomfortable. I think once the new wears off, people are more likely to accept you for who you are rather than a "what you are" situation.

Yes! I remember writing a thread about that very thing, being different in a small town... but of course, that thread was also closed.

 

[Yay Chicks!]

Lazy J Farms Feed & Hay :

Pam's Little Farm :

I don't believe that this thread is about your actual sexual life, is it? I think that it is just a place where they talk and such. There are threads for certain groups of people, I believe, where they just talk... Not really on the subject. You know? I don't see why it's not family friendly if it doesn't go into actual sexual relationships.

But being Gay is based solely on sex, so you really can not discuss homsexuality with out talking about sex.​

If being Gay was all about sex, when would I have time to feed the chickens?​

 

[chickened]

OK, what is LGBT lonely, gay bi-sexual transgender or what??
Quote:
I edited my post, but I think it got buried!

I'm bi, and trans, and looking forward to starting a family and doing some homesteading. We're out here, and will be here even if this thread gets shut down because someone decides there's something 'wrong' with us, don't worry.

And to answer the actual question...yeah, I do often feel out of place at more 'rural' events. I've had several people assume that it's okay to gay-bash around me or make jokes about transgender people because at first glance I guess I look like any other white guy. And depending on the environment, it's not always safe to speak up.

As a result, I've just started avoiding a lot of those events. I rarely go watch local horse events, which bums me out because it's something I really enjoy.

may I ask where you live? There are a lot of LGBT who are home stedding now a days. There is a sense of freedom in being independent, and A huge number of the LGBT people I know, have livestock including chickens. They just tend to keep quiet for fear of being judged since some rural communities can be less open about such things than cities.

 

[gritsar]

mom'sfolly :

Thanks mods....

I think that rural areas in general can be difficult for anyone who is seen as different. Many rural areas are such that new people are still new after living in an area for 20 years.

I can't really speak to your topic, but I know that being a liberal in a very conservative county in a very conservative state makes me self-moderate more than I would like. It also opens me to assumptions that I believe just what everyone else does because of where I live.

That can be the case whether you are homosexual or heterosexual. Rural areas can be tough. Some worse than others. Back home in NC, I could and did live in several small towns where nobody gave a hoot about who my kin were, where I came from, what I was doing there.
Then I moved to this particular part of Arkansas and oh my goodness! If I had a dollar for every time I've been asked who my kin are! It used to drive people nutty that they can't trace me through them, simply because I have no biological family here. For the first four years or so that I lived here DH and I kept our relationship private, for alot of reasons, but mainly because in the "real" world, we are both very private people. When he did start introducing me around at his work functions and such, the questions switched from me to him. Everyone was asking him, who are her kin? Where did she come from? His standard answer was/is "you wouldn't know em, she's not from around here". I love seeing the frustrated look that leaves people with. If they don't know all about me, how can they possibly gossip about me to their hearts content?

Then I have the problems associated with just being different from 99% of the population around here - I don't hunt or eat venison. Driving to Oklahoma and dumping a bunch of money at the casinos is not my idea of a good time. I don't judge people by how they dress, talk, who they are kin to or by how big their church is. I don't even practice my religion in the same way they practice theirs. I speak my mind and stick to my core values. I don't jump ship non-stop just to please those people we call the "better than thou's" in town. Mostly I just try to keep my mouth shut, not for my own sake. I couldn't give a flying monkeys butt what folks think of me, but for my DH's sake.

In short, I don't fit in and they make no bones about reminding me about it; even after living here for 7 years.

If what I have experienced in being different is just a taste of what a gay, bi or lesbian person - my son, my stepdaughter and a niece included - has to deal with on a daily basis, then my heart aches for them.

Oh and I will say one more thing (knowing full well it might get moderated). I've met alot of people in my life that have a problem with gays. After getting to know them for awhile I realized that their biggest problem with gays wasn't based on biblical teachings or moral anything. It comes down to one thing, they're homophobics. Afraid it's contagious. So next time you meet someone that wants to condemn you for who or what you are, just blow em off as the chicken s**ts they truly are.

 

[chickened]

Simultaniously

Yay Chicks! :

Lazy J Farms Feed & Hay :

Pam's Little Farm :

I don't believe that this thread is about your actual sexual life, is it? I think that it is just a place where they talk and such. There are threads for certain groups of people, I believe, where they just talk... Not really on the subject. You know? I don't see why it's not family friendly if it doesn't go into actual sexual relationships.

But being Gay is based solely on sex, so you really can not discuss homsexuality with out talking about sex.

If being Gay was all about sex, when would I have time to feed the chickens?​

 

[True Grit]

Quote:
may I ask where you live? There are a lot of LGBT who are home stedding now a days. There is a sense of freedom in being independent, and A huge number of the LGBT people I know, have livestock including chickens. They just tend to keep quiet for fear of being judged since some rural communities can be less open about such things than cities.


Close. L=lesbian

 

[Laurajean]

Quote:
That can be the case whether you are homosexual or heterosexual. Rural areas can be tough. Some worse than others. Back home in NC, I could and did live in several small towns where nobody gave a hoot about who my kin were, where I came from, what I was doing there.
Then I moved to this particular part of Arkansas and oh my goodness! If I had a dollar for every time I've been asked who my kin are! It used to drive people nutty that they can't trace me through them, simply because I have no biological family here. For the first four years or so that I lived here DH and I kept our relationship private, for alot of reasons, but mainly because in the "real" world, we are both very private people. When he did start introducing me around at his work functions and such, the questions switched from me to him. Everyone was asking him, who are her kin? Where did she come from? His standard answer was/is "you wouldn't know em, she's not from around here". I love seeing the frustrated look that leaves people with. If they don't know all about me, how can they possibly gossip about me to their hearts content?

Then I have the problems associated with just being different from 99% of the population around here - I don't hunt or eat venison. Driving to Oklahoma and dumping a bunch of money at the casinos is not my idea of a good time. I don't judge people by how they dress, talk, who they are kin to or by how big their church is. I don't even practice my religion in the same way they practice theirs. I speak my mind and stick to my core values. I don't jump ship non-stop just to please those people we call the "better than thou's" in town. Mostly I just try to keep my mouth shut, not for my own sake. I couldn't give a flying monkeys butt what folks think of me, but for my DH's sake.

In short, I don't fit in and they make no bones about reminding me about it; even after living here for 7 years.

If what I have experienced in being different is just a taste of what a gay, bi or lesbian person - my son, my stepdaughter and a niece included - has to deal with on a daily basis, then my heart aches for them.

Oh and I will say one more thing (knowing full well it might get moderated). I've met alot of people in my life that have a problem with gays. After getting to know them for awhile I realized that their biggest problem with gays wasn't based on biblical teachings or moral anything. It comes down to one thing, they're homophobics. Afraid it's contagious. So next time you meet someone that wants to condemn you for who or what you are, just blow em off as the chicken s**ts they truly are.

Wow, you just typed out my life here in my new small town perfectly. How did you do that?

 

[Carols Clucks]

I would like to suggest to the OP that you go and enjoy the local events. Even though you might not think there are other like minded people there you might just be surprised. But I would suggest being very discrete for safety reasons.


My friend owned a very open bar & nightclub locally, but when he moved to a more rural/ranching/farming area, he realized that it would be neither safe nor financially profitable to open a similar place in his new town. It is VERY much the good ol boys club there and even though he is more manly than all of them combined he knew it would cause trouble to even try and get a liquor lic there for a similar club.


Once he was established there, he discovered that he was very much not alone and now knows all the places he enjoys going with out getting hassled.

 

[chickened]

I kind of agree with this logically as you would just be pals.

Lazy J Farms Feed & Hay :

Pam's Little Farm :

I don't believe that this thread is about your actual sexual life, is it? I think that it is just a place where they talk and such. There are threads for certain groups of people, I believe, where they just talk... Not really on the subject. You know? I don't see why it's not family friendly if it doesn't go into actual sexual relationships.

But being Gay is based solely on sex, so you really can not discuss homsexuality with out talking about sex.​

 

[Jferlisi]

Quote:
may I ask where you live? There are a lot of LGBT who are home stedding now a days. There is a sense of freedom in being independent, and A huge number of the LGBT people I know, have livestock including chickens. They just tend to keep quiet for fear of being judged since some rural communities can be less open about such things than cities.


LGBT stands for lesbian gay bi transgender.