Hobbies for anxiety?

[SmiYa0126]

My anxiety has been through the roof lately because my chickens are sick, and besides that, some family members are going through some bad times; my brother seems to be attracted to alcohol more than he should. I feel guilty because I've been neglecting my coop in my attempts to make him recover. Now, I have to cope with more problems, and I'm so anxious and nervous. Do interventions work in such cases? Should I try to help him, or should I let him figure this out on his own? I am also looking for a piece of advice and some encouragement.

Hi interventions only work if the person recognizes the problem, otherwise you may be enabling the behavior. I have a sibling that OD'd three times and now yes abusing alcohol and drugs, another that is abusing alcohol. I'm there for them as a positive presence and am ready to help them when they recognize that they have a problem.

 

[EmmaRainboe]

My anxiety has been through the roof lately because my chickens are sick, and besides that, some family members are going through some bad times; my brother seems to be attracted to alcohol more than he should. I feel guilty because I've been neglecting my coop in my attempts to make him recover. Now, I have to cope with more problems, and I'm so anxious and nervous. Do interventions work in such cases? Should I try to help him, or should I let him figure this out on his own? I am also looking for a piece of advice and some encouragement.

I am heavily involved in advocating for mental health and sharing resources on how to get help. Your brother needs to get support. I would sit him down and have a small conversation on how tou are worried about him, and that he needs to talk to someone. There are many programs out there such as AA, but no matter what do not carry the weight on your own shoulders. It is not your responsibility. By this post I am assuming you are a minor, you can absolutely support him, infact please do! But do not carry all the baggage that comes with it. That's what bellhops in the form of counselors are for. And I don't mean for him. For you too. Someone to help you figure out how to navigate your situation.

And please stop punishing your chickens for your brothers actions, it will not make him stop, it will only cause you added stress.

And lastly, hugs hugs.

 

[kcan2]

My anxiety has been through the roof lately because my chickens are sick, and besides that, some family members are going through some bad times; my brother seems to be attracted to alcohol more than he should. I feel guilty because I've been neglecting my coop in my attempts to make him recover. Now, I have to cope with more problems, and I'm so anxious and nervous. Do interventions work in such cases? Should I try to help him, or should I let him figure this out on his own? I am also looking for a piece of advice and some encouragement.

Try to keep the problems (especially the ones that aren't yours to begin with) on the outside of you and not let them inside of you. Some ways to do that might be taking care of your health first, also being around the chickies is always calming, at least for me! I read a book called I Do Boundaries by Havilah Cunnington and it might be helpful in your situation, too. Hugs to you, your fam, and your chickens, too!

 

[BigBlueHen53]

You have gotten good replies here. You are not responsible for the choices or actions of other people, no matter how much you love them or how deeply their actions distress you. You can't control anyone else, only yourself. I have found prayer to be both comforting and helpful, you may as well. Taking care of your chickens and involving yourself in positive action, helping others in whatever ways you can, may also help alleviate your anxiety. Best wishes to you and to him.

 

[Goosebaby]

My anxiety has been through the roof lately because my chickens are sick, and besides that, some family members are going through some bad times; my brother seems to be attracted to alcohol more than he should. I feel guilty because I've been neglecting my coop in my attempts to make him recover. Now, I have to cope with more problems, and I'm so anxious and nervous. Do interventions work in such cases? Should I try to help him, or should I let him figure this out on his own? I am also looking for a piece of advice and some encouragement.

I’m sorry for what you’re going through, I can’t say wether intervention works or not unfortunatly, from what I do know about those who suffer from substance abuse, some do it is a coping mechanism and for that they’ll probably need therapy to help them work through it, for others, it can be just who they are or because they have a mental illness and as hard as it is to accept you can’t help them, no one really can. You have to cut them loose or they will drag you down with them wether they intend to or not.

You have anxiety over this so I know you’re a very empathetic person, but that means that you’re also an easy victim to take advantage of, I don’t know anything about what kind of person your brother is, but if he can’t make the choice to help himself no one else can, and anyone who makes it their life’s mission to save those who ultimately don’t want to save themselves just go down with that ship with them.

I’m speaking from the knowledge of what I’ve witnessed with my own family, my aunt’s husband drank himself to death, no one, not even his wife or children, his church and councilors, could stop him. My great aunt and uncle lost their home, job, and retirement because they gave up everything to put their son through rehab multiple times.
My parents haven’t learned from those lessons and have already blown through their savings, retirement, and are likely going to lose their home and job because they can’t say no and can’t stop supporting my narcissistic psychopathic brother.
My parents, my great aunt and uncle, and my aunt never got a thank you from the people they’ve destroyed their lives trying to help.

The fact that what your brother is going through is already impacting you this much shows that you are suffering from this, and by association so is your flock. I know you care about your brother but all you can do is encourage him to change his life, but ultimately you need to look out for your own well being because he won’t.

Please be kind to yourself, this isn’t your fault, but you need to be your own advocate and surround yourself with people that will also have your back.

 

[BigBlueHen53]

I just want to say that I prayed for my son for over 30 years. He started drinking at 15 although we taught our kids from a fairly early age that there was alcoholism in our family and they should avoid alcohol at all costs. God has heard my prayers and he has been clean and sober now for about a year. Never give up on your loved one. Although there may be nothing you can do to influence them directly without destroying your own life, God hears and answers prayers.

 

[Jenni Hen]

Please be kind to yourself... and surround yourself with people that will also have your back.

Echoing the good and caring advice that has already been given... ensure that you do not fall victim to the problems that affect your brother so badly.
Stand firmly by the healthy choices you have made.
In particular, you /enjoy caring for your flock, which is a wonderful lifestyle choice; losing that won't help your brother. So ensure that you are able to do all that your flock requires - including space to enjoy them and think about them.
On a practical, day-to-day basis, if there's stuff kicking off routinely, you absolutely need to get away, recover and regain your strength - and where better than by attending to your chickens?

 

[Cat Ballou]

What I do for stress: