How old were you?

I flunk!

I live in a very expensive town with a city college people come from out of state to attend and a very popular university.

I have always told the boys that I can not afford a college fund for them, but as long as they are in school, working and helping with their own expenses they can live here.

The oldest could not wait to move out and not have to share a room with his brother, he is doing great and has a good job and wonderful GF (he bought his first NEW car at 18).

Middle son asked late one night if his gf could stay a couple of days cause she had a problem with her parents, things there have just gone dramatically downhill....so I now have a pair of 19 year olds. Unfortunately, they both recently lost their jobs and are having a hard time finding anything new, but they are both still in school and getting good grades. Hmm maybe I will have to move and not leave a forwarding address for that son............

The youngest is not 18 yet, but works and is in HS. I hope he decides to stay and get a college education before he moves.

I hate to think of them being saddled with 50-100k of student loan debt in this economy (my cousins son is deeper in debt than that and unlikely to have a job to pay for his $$$ education until the economy turns around-and he moves to China)
 
I finished HS when I was 18, but I had health issues, took a semester off for healing, then stayed at my parents while I worked full time and went to college full time. Got married and moved out when I was 21 (and then finished my bachlors). My parents came and lived with us for a brief time when they were between houses and I figure that somewhere down the line I'll be having them move in with me when they are needing help.
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I'll be fine with the boys living with us as long as they aren't mooching. They have to have a job, be in school, etc. and be helping out. With that criteria... I don't really mind if they never leave - but I'd rather them be independent and live off on their own.
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I was in and out of foster care from age 7 - 13. I did not and would not let anyone adopt me. I was insistent on being with my mother and that is what happened from the time I was 13. I remember the cops kept picking me up when I was 15 since I was still award of the state that is when I showed up at a local state office like cps, dshs or something they would call the cops. I was finally emancipated so to speak at the age of 16.
 
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AAAWWW thanks! I made it through it all, & raised my kids & a whole lot of others kids! & seen & been through a lot of stuff, But i did it! I thank God & alot of good people along the way
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I was 18 when I left home. I lived in a small military town at the time, so going to college while living at home wasn't an option. My relationship with my father was tumultuous at the time anyway, so I would not have felt comfortable staying anyway.

My eldest son is turning 17 this weekend, so this is an issue for us that is quickly approaching. We live in a University town and rents are pretty steep, with a very low vacancy rate. He will either be living with us or with his girlfriend in the cottage behind her parent's house while they are in school. It's important to me (and to him) that he graduate debt free, or as close to it as he can. His plans are to go for a BS in Nursing, which is a pretty demanding program so his job hours will have to be limited. That said, he's not the lazy sort, and is very helpful and thoughtful to have around. I'm getting used to the idea that he's looking at starting his life away from home in a year and a half and the selfish part of me wishes that he'd be at home longer (though I am happy for him that he has found a girl that he loves so much).

We are hoping to give the two of them the start that we didn't have, no debt after graduation. As long as he doesn't have rent to contend with, we are planning on being able to pay for his college expenses as much as possible.

I recently heard a segment on NPR dealing with this issue. Leaving home at 18 is relatively new to the US, it started during the boom years after WWII and is very particular to the US (not as common in other cultures). It's pretty tied to the economy so it makes sense that people are staying at home longer right now. It was pretty interesting segment and really made me look at the issue differently.

A year ago my neighbors' father moved in with them, her mother had passed away and he has Alzheimers. Shortly thereafter on of their adult sons and his wife moved back in from San Diego. She told me that she loves having them there and that the help that they have been providing has been wonderful. Now that they have employment again, I think part of her is sad to see them leave. This story seems to be pretty common right now.
 

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