How to count chickens

Kfults

Songster
Jun 12, 2018
313
730
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Southwest Louisiana
How to count your chickens

1. You do not count any eggs in the incubator because you don't count your chickens before they hatch.
2. You don’t count chickens that were given as a gift because they were a present and are more properly considered a gift rather than a chicken.
3. You do not count any bird under 18 weeks old because they are too young to lay eggs so they are considered juveniles rather than chickens.
4. You don't count bantams because bantams are considered bantams rather than chickens.
5. You don't count ornamental birds because they are ornamental and are considered yard art, folk art, or fine art rather than chickens.
6. You don’t count birds beyond laying age because they’re retired and don’t lay eggs and are considered retirees rather than chickens.
7. You don’t count birds in molt because they’re are in molt and missing feathers so cannot be properly considered as complete chickens.
8. You don’t count males because they are protectors of the flock and are more accurately considered guard dogs rather than chickens.
9. You don’t count laying hens because they produce eggs and thus are more accurately described as a food source rather than chickens.
10. You don’t count sick or injured birds because they are sick or injured and their disposition is in question so they go on the injured or sick list not on your list of chickens.
11. You don’t count birds that are for sale or possibly for sale because they belong or will belong to someone else.
12. You don't count broody hens because you can't even get close enough to count them.
13. You don't count freeloading chickens because they're not producing eggs, therefore they are defective chickens.

Thus, if you follow the rules (and it is always good to follow the rules) you may only count healthy full size female chickens that are not in molt and not a gift and are of laying age but not laying.

Happy counting! :lau
 
How to count your chickens

1. You do not count any eggs in the incubator because you don't count your chickens before they hatch.
2. You don’t count chickens that were given as a gift because they were a present and are more properly considered a gift rather than a chicken.
3. You do not count any bird under 18 weeks old because they are too young to lay eggs so they are considered juveniles rather than chickens.
4. You don't count bantams because bantams are considered bantams rather than chickens.
5. You don't count ornamental birds because they are ornamental and are considered yard art, folk art, or fine art rather than chickens.
6. You don’t count birds beyond laying age because they’re retired and don’t lay eggs and are considered retirees rather than chickens.
7. You don’t count birds in molt because they’re are in molt and missing feathers so cannot be properly considered as complete chickens.
8. You don’t count males because they are protectors of the flock and are more accurately considered guard dogs rather than chickens.
9. You don’t count laying hens because they produce eggs and thus are more accurately described as a food source rather than chickens.
10. You don’t count sick or injured birds because they are sick or injured and their disposition is in question so they go on the injured or sick list not on your list of chickens.
11. You don’t count birds that are for sale or possibly for sale because they belong or will belong to someone else.
12. You don't count broody hens because you can't even get close enough to count them.
13. You don't count freeloading chickens because they're not producing eggs, therefore they are defective chickens.

Thus, if you follow the rules (and it is always good to follow the rules) you may only count healthy full size female chickens that are not in molt and not a gift and are of laying age but not laying.

Happy counting! :lau
The last statement is wrong because you will not be able to count any chickens because if they aren't laying they are freeloading chickens which don't count. Therefore everyone has a total of zero chickens and zero chickens is not enough so everyone must invest in more
 

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