how to deal with control freaks?

[jeepgurl]

UPDATE ON CONTROL FREAK. We all arrive to class and everyone states they were confused about where to find info to complete the assignments. She stands up and starts to tell everyone that she has the info and how it took her six hours to get it and then proceeds to read off all her answers. I hate being a captive audience so I said excuse me and told her that we didnt need the answers, just the source. Turns out the teacher had not given us this particular book yet and it was a mistake on her part. No big deal right? I could tell she was fuming at not getting to be the center of attention. Then I finished a test early and went in to ask my teacher about some lab values that I couldnt put together. (for those of you who into this kind of thing, my dad had a heart attack yesterday and while i know what cardiac enzymes are and what they do, i didnt know about peaking of troponin). She asked me what I was doing back there. I didnt answer. After class I had gone up to the teachers seat and asked if our general assessment test would really be general or did we need to refresh on cranial nerves and functions. She said it would be general. Then control freak says WHAT DID YOU ASK HER? WHAT WAS THE QUESTION? So I told her and she looked at me with this blank look and the teacher says that kinda stuff is on a bsn level. So now she looks at me with disgust, you know, one of those head to toe looks. GGGRRRRRRR. Why cant she just leave me alone? I am already resolved to telling her to lay off and mind her own business next time it happens. Thanks for letting me vent again. BTW, everyone else seems pretty nice and laid back. But I do see her trying to control them too.

 

[ebwy2]

just tell her to mind her own and ignore her whining if she asks again.

conversations she is not part of are not her business.

 

[jeepgurl]

i hate to embarrass anyone but next time i will say something.

 

[redhen]

Its best to just be friendly..it avoids any unnessary drama..
Unless she is really causing you problems...best to just be polite.
Don't have to be her friend..by any means though...lol

 

[jeepgurl]

yeah youre probably right. i will just continue to be friendly. if i have to talk to her i will do it in private and try not to make her feel bad. thanks, i really dont want to be a part of the drama. i just want to do my work and get through with the least amount of hassle.

 

[Reurra]

There is always the nasty busy body hen in the hen house.

Ive known people like that and sometimes, no matter where you go, you cant get away from them. I kill them with kindness.

I had a co-worker last year that drove me nuts. He could not accept that I was a manager and he was a cashier. he was an older gentleman that believed that his age made him more knowledgeable in our line of work. Although his background wasnt in customer service and I had spent the last 4 years doing just that along with optimizing efficiency in the work place.

For the first few weeks he just got under my skin. Just the mention of him could ruin my day. then i realized he was a control freak because I gave him the power to control me and my emotions. After that I started smiling at him more, even giving him little treats when we had extra food left over after preparation. He really turned around after that and even his work performance improved. In the end, when I finally had to leave, he gave me a hug and said he would miss me lol. I still dont like him, but I refused to let him have the power to upset me.

I dont know if it would work in your case, but people around you will see that you are the nice one, especially if you never say anything bad about her, or roll your eyes when she has her back turned. They will see you for who you really are and in the end, she will just dig her own hole and destroy herself.

My Mom always used to say, Crab in a bucket will always try to drag down the ones on top in an effort to escape, they will kill, maim and smash thier own comrades to gain that extra inch.

 

[jeepgurl]

My husband says that same thing about the crabs! I would like to say that her behavior doesnt bother me but i would be lying. Its like a rock in my shoe. Im gonna try to keep it classy. And you got me thinking about this, we are the same age with the same title but I have a lot more knowledge in my field that she does, a lot more experience, and a larger skill set. Maybe she is just jealous. I can help her get over this by sharing what I know, but she seems to resent the fact that I know so much about our shared field. It must be a pride thing. I got over that a long time ago and I learn something new everyday even when Im not trying to! When I do get a little cocky, something always comes along that knocks me down off my high horse!