Hubby vs. My Mom

[Quail_Antwerp]

Well I talked to my mom this morning about her chickens, and she was very nice about it! She said she understood, was not angry, and she wants her chickens home, too.

Then I told her about my ads on CL and freecycle for fencing, and how I was already contacted about some chainlink fence, and she was so excited about that!

So the number for the fence is long distance for me, so I am needing my mom to call it. We agreed that if she can make the arrangements to get the fencing, then we will split it!

 

[tntstanifer]

Yeah!! That is awesome!! I'm so happy for you, and hubby, and Mom and chickens!!

 

[Cetawin]

Yay..glad it worked out

 

[Frizzledhen]

I am happy things are working out for you and your mom.

I hate to be a butt head but, have we forgotten the sacrfices our partents made for us as we were growing up? Have we forgotten how much they gave up so we could have? How many years did they take care of us, love us and except us for who we were? I for one would do whatever was in my power to help my mom, dad and inlaws. Even if it were a temporary burden to me. I will never be able to do for my folks nearly as much as they did for me.
My parents and inlaws are all gone now. I do know that I did everything I could to help them when they needed it. Not because I HAD to, but because I loved them all so dearly.

Remember, we will all grow old someday, God willing, and we may need help and understanding from our kids. Will they remember all that we did for them as children? Will they remember the love we had for our parents and the joy it brought us to be able to help them when they needed it?
I am old and have been through form both sides now. It warms my heart to hear my daughter say, "Mom you have always given to the people you love, it is my turn now to give to you". I know I can count on her in my times of need.

Sorry this is so long. This thread inspired me to write what I did. It is not meant to make anyone feel guilty. We are all a product of our parents and the way we were brought up. I was blessed to have the mom and dad that I had.

 

[luvmychicknkids]

Quote:
This is all so very true, but one thing my mother always told me and still does is this: "The most important thing you can EVER give back to me is to raise your children well and put your family first." We both know there are thing she needs help with now and there will be more down the road, but not at the expense of my own family. When my kids are grown I NEVER want to be put before their own family. What we owe our parents most is to push it all forward.

I am really glad it sounds like this is going to work out. You sound like a great wife and a great daughter!!!

 

[Quail_Antwerp]

Frizzledhen, I understand what you are trying to say, and you have not offended me.

I love my mom very much. And she knows that. We took her chickens in at a time when she was emotionally very drained. Her father had just died and she left her poultry to the care of my step father and half brother. She came home to her pet duck dying and a single townsperson complaining to the mayor about her chickens getting loose.

We helped my mom and my step father gave us his word that it would only be for the summer. He promised us he would get her place up to par for her poultry. Step dad didn't keep his word. My husband built the coop at her house so her chickens could go home. My husband does alot of small things for my mom that her husband won't do. I am doing all I can now to find fencing for her to help them get home sooner. She wants them home, too.

My mom would see it as failure on her end if I didn't put my husband first. BUT having said that, both she and my husband knows that if it came down to my mom needing care for herself, she will be moved into my home and I will care for her, no matter the burden.

I will also say, even though he sometimes feels like he is doing doing and doing for everyone else, my husband really does think the world of my mom, as she is the only living mother he has.

luvmychicknkids, I do the best I can, but I am far from great. Thank you for the compliment, though

ETA: I am in a much better frame of mind and emotion about all of this now than I was when I posted my first post. Please forgive me if I in anyway sounded unappreciative of either my mother or my husband.

 

[BeardedChick]

The problem is I don't mind keeping them until she is ready to take them home, but my hubby does.

Then, figure out what to do for your husband in trade so he will be happy to keep the chickens until Oct.

There has to be SOMETHING that would be more fun than arguing. Bake him some brownies, give some backrubs... Wink wink, nudge nudge.

Explain to him how much it means to YOU that he is helping her and lay on the sweet talk.​

 

[Quail_Antwerp]

Quote:
Then, figure out what to do for your husband in trade so he will be happy to keep the chickens until Oct.

There has to be SOMETHING that would be more fun than arguing. Bake him some brownies, give some backrubs... Wink wink, nudge nudge.

Explain to him how much it means to YOU that he is helping her and lay on the sweet talk.

I bought him goats that he really wanted, does that count?

 

[tiki244]

ETA: O I just read the OP and then posted a response and didnt read through the whole thing to find out that you have resolved the issue. So after reading it all I am changing my response.Well, great!!! Congratulations!!!

Glad you got everything resolved.

 

[Frizzledhen]

Quail_Antwerp it was not your post that inspired me. It was (what seemed to me) the over whelming response to, just tell mom to take her chickens back. It came across to me that you were doing all you could to keep peace in both homes. I commend you for that. My husband was so supportive of what I wanted to do. He was often my tower of strength when I needed it. I was truley blessed.