I almost made an @ thread.

[redhen]

also..i'm not directing my comments to ANYONE..just saying..

 

[rainplace]

Quote:
I agree! I was using that as an example... I wanted to clarify what was actually being said.

 

[hikerchick]

Quote:
Who are you addressing this to? It sounds like an awfully mean thing to say to someone.

 

[hikerchick]

Quote:
OOps forget my question then.

 

[redhen]

Quote:
Who are you addressing this to? It sounds like an awfully mean thing to say to someone.

I said noone! Just rude,mean people in general...

 

[redhen]

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OOps forget my question then.

lol..okay..got it..

 

[bluey]

Quote:

I only wish some folks let the noodle sort things out before they reacted to things.

 

[hikerchick]

to roughly paraphrase a line from Bride Wars..

Maybe SOME of us should be more tactful. Yes, SOME of us should.

And maybe SOME of us should be less thin skinned. Yes, SOME of us should.

Ok, not even really a paraphrase but I love that scene in the movie.

 

[ranchhand]

Quote:

I only wish some folks let the noodle sort things out before they reacted to things

.​

Bluey, how about a happy dance for thinking of the results first?

BTW, this is a mighty stressful time of year for EVERYONE and I think everyone deserves a little slack in the "holiday season". It's not the fun time like the commercials portray......

 

[CityGirlintheCountry]

So perhaps we are all saying that there is a time and a place for complete honesty.

I have several very good friends. I not only expect them to be honest, but I need them to be honest with me. They are my sounding board. If I am doing something stupid or having a person problem, I need them to point it out. They are my first line of defense before acting a fool in public.

Their honesty is helpful and useful. I know that they speak the truth to me because they love me.

Now, if people other than my friends said those very same things to me, I would be hurt and offended. Non-friends do not have the right. At that point it is being hateful and mean-spirited. We are not close enough for that level of honesty.

Online I think the lines blur. Because we are essentially anonymous on here, we feel like we can get away with saying things that perhaps we have no business saying. True, a lot of the posts in this section are people just coming to vent. I have done it myself when I just needed an escape route. When you are venting you just want to get it out and don't necessarily want people to disagree with you. You want affirmation that you are right in being outraged.

The problem is that it is really hard to not point out to people when they are being stupid (which is too harsh a word to use, but I can't think of a better one right now. Forgive my stupidity.

) More than once I have bitten my tongue and just not posted. There are people that make different lifestyle choices than I make, choices that aggrevate me to death. Does that give me the right to jump all over them? Not really. My verbally trashing someone doesn't change their behavior and only makes me more aggrevated. I have found that the delete button is a happy choice. I have also learned which people online are going to aggrevate me and I just don't open their posts. No sense upping the blood pressure.

I understand what you are saying, Hikerchick. When someone is making bad choices (the proverbial playing with matches), you should be able to point it out to them. The problem is that it never works. People that play with matches are just going to play with matches no matter what you say to them. A better plan perhaps is to break out the fire extinguisher and just stand back. They will self destruct at some point.