I can not believe what happened today

[KristyHall]

Quote:
thanks Laurajean. That is why I didn't make any calls because I knew there was nothing they can do for the very reasons you pointed out.

 

[wolftracks]

Quote:
My opinion also...

Mine too.

I had to try and wrangle 4 at once when I ran into my boss at a mall. He's telling me about a meeting I didn't know about and then he started in about a client of mine and 4 kids can run 4 directions. They knew better. I could go places and people told me how good they were. I think it was a consipacy, because they drove me nuts. That was just the first 4 I had 6.

I do believe in spanking. I'd swat a behind to get attention, because beating would wear me out. Turning and walking usually worked, but not always and when you have one under a clothes display turning it and yelling weeeeeeeee, and people staring at you while you try to stop it, you can better believe the kid I grabbed and who said I'm calling a cop got a swat on the butt! And yes a huge woman that looked like she would have eatten one of my kids got a cop and security guard there because I swatted her once. Not hard, just a swat.

I got people standing all over watching and when they told her they didn't look abused and that there is no law against a spanking if it's not extensive and there are no marks, she argued and they told her she needed to be quiet and move on. And the people standing around clapped. Heck the ones that had been in the store probably wanted to spank her.

I don't have a dime to my name now, but I did then and it seems if you have money people don't like you and if you have no money they don't like you. Ya can't win.

The kids in cars? OMG it breaks my heart. Those poor babies. No one is perfect and yes in this rushed world, they do forget. One man rushed to work years ago. His wife usually drove the baby to daycare, but had to be at work early. Dad got him in the car and got on the freeway. Traffic, on his way to work, things diverting him and he went to work and later got a call asking why he didn't get the baby to the sitter. He ran out and found his son. That man was devistated while the news showed him going handcuffed into the cop car and sobbing about losing his son and knowing he did it.

Or the grandmother that went to unlock her door, so she could carry her grandchild and groceries inside. She had a seazure and passed out. The 2 or 3 year old died by the time someone noticed her laying on her porch and the car door open. They gave that woman 4 years and she had another siezure and died before they could take her out of the courtroom.

I'm sure there are people who never look away from their kids and keep them under lock and key so they don't get hurt. My kids played and no I didn't stare at them every waking hour. They all grew up to be some pretty awesome people. If anything they're over achievers, so I hope that doesn't make them some lower form of life.

When agencies get calls on people who just aren't paying attention or getting red in the face mad at a 12 year old that should know to stand there and not act up in a store, no matter if the parents aren't centering their attention on him, but yet not clobbering him, they don't have time to save the ones that need them. Like a little boy near where we used to live. They got 10+ calls about the dad beating him. Bruises and they didn't take him. The mother calls from Southern Cal and says she's on her way, can they go pick up her son. She had gotten phone calls from people warning her he wasn't be treated well. They told her there was no evidence. By the time her and her mother got to town she was having to go to the hospital and look at her beaten son, who was there because he got the wrong letters wrong one too many times for his dad. He was 4. He didn't live long enough to see his mommy. The only reason he was with his dad was because a judge said he could have him for 3 months out of the year. His stepmother went to jail too, because while he was being chocked and slammed by his feet while the day slammed his head int othe wall, she just sat and watched.

They didn't save a baby girl who showed up on my husbands shift because every bone and major organ in her body was broken or ruptured. My husband made the papers on that one. It took 7 Sheriffs, security guards and doctors to pull him out of the cop car and off the dad. He did a year. He was released because he told them he was on drugs and didn't know what he was doing.

So much for just agreeing. sorry I was on a roll.

There are so many kids removed from families by agencies that for years have been corrupt. Search the web. Fifty years and they haven't gotten any better. They take the wrong ones and leave the ones who need help. Sometimes the wrong ones and even the ones that should be in the system disappear or are really abused or killed. People think those are few and far between, but they aren't. It happens all the time and when someone rushes to a phone because someone else isn't as perfect a parent as them, the kids pay for it.

 

[mulewagon]

Quote:
Like people might really forget that they had their kids in the car? That is frightening. "where's my purse? Oh, Junior, how did you get there?" Yikes.

People do in fact forget that sometimes - it doesn't have anything to do with how much they love their children, sometimes they forget where they are. Especially with the backwards-facing car seats, so they can't see the baby. (Some people put mirrors on the carseats, which is an excellent idea!)

The problem is that people run their routines on autopilot, so when something changes at short notice, like who is going to leave the kid at daycare, they can forget to drop him off, and then if they can't see him... So it's very important for anybody who transports children to make sure they can always see the child in a mirror or something, and set up a routine so they'll automatically check the back every time.

As for Kristy's problem...I dunno...You did well by putting social pressure on them. It's worrisome to see people with so little common sense. But I don't know of any long-term cure. Maybe if everyone hissed "Watch your children!" at them...

 

[Dunkopf]

Quote:
Like people might really forget that they had their kids in the car? That is frightening. "where's my purse? Oh, Junior, how did you get there?" Yikes.

That's terribly scary. We had a man here in Denver that didn't usually drop the baby at day care. He was on auto pilot concerned about his meeting at 9Am and forgot all about the sleeping baby in his car seat. Left him in the parking lot and remembered him after his meeting. Baby was dead by the time he rushed outside.

It was very tragic and I felt very badly for the couple and of course the baby. I'm sure it destroyed his and his wives lives. I can't imagine what it would be like for the baby slowly roasting in the car.

As for the OP. I see that everywhere I go. I have since I was old enough to notice it, so I hope this doesn't turn into the ole what is the world coming to theme that seems to occur at least once every few days. People are people and it's not always easy to attend to your own needs as well as shower a child with all the attention they need too.

So to those that don't have kids. Remember that they take a huge chunk of your time and energy. They give it back though. Sometimes you want to kill them, other times you can't imagine how you could live without them.

 

[KristyHall]

Quote:
Like people might really forget that they had their kids in the car? That is frightening. "where's my purse? Oh, Junior, how did you get there?" Yikes.

That's terribly scary. We had a man here in Denver that didn't usually drop the baby at day care. He was on auto pilot concerned about his meeting at 9Am and forgot all about the sleeping baby in his car seat. Left him in the parking lot and remembered him after his meeting. Baby was dead by the time he rushed outside.

It was very tragic and I felt very badly for the couple and of course the baby. I'm sure it destroyed his and his wives lives. I can't imagine what it would be like for the baby slowly roasting in the car.

As for the OP. I see that everywhere I go. I have since I was old enough to notice it, so I hope this doesn't turn into the ole what is the world coming to theme that seems to occur at least once every few days. People are people and it's not always easy to attend to your own needs as well as shower a child with all the attention they need too.

So to those that don't have kids. Remember that they take a huge chunk of your time and energy. They give it back though. Sometimes you want to kill them, other times you can't imagine how you could live without them.

that just breaks my heart

 

[welsummerchicks]

My guess is that if you reported what you saw to Child Protective, they would tell you that it is not enough for them to go talk to the parents or take any other action. And they might tell you how each case worker already has a case load of hundreds of families or that they have families they are dealing with who have killed some of their children already or made their children pregnant...they deal with horrific things....the horrific things have to come first, and near disasters can't be intervened with til something actually happens.

You can blame that on activists who have put incredibly pressure on government agencies to leave children with their families - just about no matter what.

Besides, you'd have to tell CPS where they live. They could have been from anywhere.

 

[sharron]

agree, times 2
Quote:

 

[I have WHAT in my yard?]

Yes, people leave their childrne in cars ll the time. Our recent one here in PA was a woman who was driving some one else's baby to the day care center, she did not usually have this child with her. She got a call from her doctor's office on her cell and they told her she had cancer!! She ran into work and forgot the baby. The baby died.

Everyone knew it was a terrible tragedy, but the family of the child sued and pressed charges. The woman made her own kind of decision on her punishment. She refused to be treated for her cancer......





We all see horrible situations like what you saw, but they did not do anything illegal so there was no point in calling anyone. That 12 year old will end up being a bully at school......

 

[Dunkopf]

Quote:
My opinion also...

Mine too.

I had to try and wrangle 4 at once when I ran into my boss at a mall. He's telling me about a meeting I didn't know about and then he started in about a client of mine and 4 kids can run 4 directions. They knew better. I could go places and people told me how good they were. I think it was a consipacy, because they drove me nuts. That was just the first 4 I had 6.

I do believe in spanking. I'd swat a behind to get attention, because beating would wear me out. Turning and walking usually worked, but not always and when you have one under a clothes display turning it and yelling weeeeeeeee, and people staring at you while you try to stop it, you can better believe the kid I grabbed and who said I'm calling a cop got a swat on the butt! And yes a huge woman that looked like she would have eatten one of my kids got a cop and security guard there because I swatted her once. Not hard, just a swat.

I got people standing all over watching and when they told her they didn't look abused and that there is no law against a spanking if it's not extensive and there are no marks, she argued and they told her she needed to be quiet and move on. And the people standing around clapped. Heck the ones that had been in the store probably wanted to spank her.

I don't have a dime to my name now, but I did then and it seems if you have money people don't like you and if you have no money they don't like you. Ya can't win.

The kids in cars? OMG it breaks my heart. Those poor babies. No one is perfect and yes in this rushed world, they do forget. One man rushed to work years ago. His wife usually drove the baby to daycare, but had to be at work early. Dad got him in the car and got on the freeway. Traffic, on his way to work, things diverting him and he went to work and later got a call asking why he didn't get the baby to the sitter. He ran out and found his son. That man was devistated while the news showed him going handcuffed into the cop car and sobbing about losing his son and knowing he did it.

Or the grandmother that went to unlock her door, so she could carry her grandchild and groceries inside. She had a seazure and passed out. The 2 or 3 year old died by the time someone noticed her laying on her porch and the car door open. They gave that woman 4 years and she had another siezure and died before they could take her out of the courtroom.

I'm sure there are people who never look away from their kids and keep them under lock and key so they don't get hurt. My kids played and no I didn't stare at them every waking hour. They all grew up to be some pretty awesome people. If anything they're over achievers, so I hope that doesn't make them some lower form of life.

When agencies get calls on people who just aren't paying attention or getting red in the face mad at a 12 year old that should know to stand there and not act up in a store, no matter if the parents aren't centering their attention on him, but yet not clobbering him, they don't have time to save the ones that need them. Like a little boy near where we used to live. They got 10+ calls about the dad beating him. Bruises and they didn't take him. The mother calls from Southern Cal and says she's on her way, can they go pick up her son. She had gotten phone calls from people warning her he wasn't be treated well. They told her there was no evidence. By the time her and her mother got to town she was having to go to the hospital and look at her beaten son, who was there because he got the wrong letters wrong one too many times for his dad. He was 4. He didn't live long enough to see his mommy. The only reason he was with his dad was because a judge said he could have him for 3 months out of the year. His stepmother went to jail too, because while he was being chocked and slammed by his feet while the day slammed his head int othe wall, she just sat and watched.

They didn't save a baby girl who showed up on my husbands shift because every bone and major organ in her body was broken or ruptured. My husband made the papers on that one. It took 7 Sheriffs, security guards and doctors to pull him out of the cop car and off the dad. He did a year. He was released because he told them he was on drugs and didn't know what he was doing.

So much for just agreeing. sorry I was on a roll.

There are so many kids removed from families by agencies that for years have been corrupt. Search the web. Fifty years and they haven't gotten any better. They take the wrong ones and leave the ones who need help. Sometimes the wrong ones and even the ones that should be in the system disappear or are really abused or killed. People think those are few and far between, but they aren't. It happens all the time and when someone rushes to a phone because someone else isn't as perfect a parent as them, the kids pay for it.

We fostered for Denver Social Services for 10 years. I believe DW said we had around 67 kids come through our home. There were a couple out of those that didn't really need to be removed. Minor drug issues. Not dealing or heavy drugs. Just something like pulled over with a little and the kids were put in protective custody. Parents weren't DUI or anything. Kids were placed with us till the parents were investigated and the kids were given back. Traumatic for the kids for sure. The parents do get to visit them and if the parents actually love the kids it is very hard on them too. Fortunately it's a rare occurrence. 98% of the time they are saving the kids.

I can't tell you how many times kids were given up by their parents because drugs and alcohol were a higher priority or they beat their kids. We had a 2 year old that had been kept in her mothers closet for most of her life strapped in a car seat while the mother went to work. Her back was curved and the hair was worn off of her scalp in back. Her grandmother took custody after a couple months after background investigations were complete. We inquired about her a year later when we had the same case worker for a different child. The child was back in foster care for neglect again.

Child services is a very important part of child protection. Many people think of their children as property and that they can treat them however they like. Unfortunately on the very rare occasion that a foster family abuses a child in their care it makes bigger headlines than the father that swings his 12 month old baby around and slams him into the wall a few times because he wouldn't stop crying. Yet, social services is the first place the city cuts when the budget gets tight. Then everyone wants to know why the case workers can't handle shuffling 100 cases a month because half the staff has been cut and the other half is given unpaid time off 6 or 7 times a year. Naturally they work anyway because they can't afford to stay home. They actually care about the kids entrusted to them.

When you foster kids it gives you a real look at how some people treat kids. Physical neglect is usually associated with poverty and drugs. Physical abuse knows no social barriers.

Did anyone see the episode of CSI where this couple had a baby that died of some very rare disease. They had another baby that they thought for some reason had the same disease. The first baby died a horrible death. So the parents gave the new baby an overdose of benadryl and left him in a hot car in Vegas to save it the torment of dying from this disease. Then of course they found out the baby didn't actually have the disease. That was a really hard episode to watch.

 

[redhen]

Quote:
Mine too.

I had to try and wrangle 4 at once when I ran into my boss at a mall. He's telling me about a meeting I didn't know about and then he started in about a client of mine and 4 kids can run 4 directions. They knew better. I could go places and people told me how good they were. I think it was a consipacy, because they drove me nuts. That was just the first 4 I had 6.

I do believe in spanking. I'd swat a behind to get attention, because beating would wear me out. Turning and walking usually worked, but not always and when you have one under a clothes display turning it and yelling weeeeeeeee, and people staring at you while you try to stop it, you can better believe the kid I grabbed and who said I'm calling a cop got a swat on the butt! And yes a huge woman that looked like she would have eatten one of my kids got a cop and security guard there because I swatted her once. Not hard, just a swat.

I got people standing all over watching and when they told her they didn't look abused and that there is no law against a spanking if it's not extensive and there are no marks, she argued and they told her she needed to be quiet and move on. And the people standing around clapped. Heck the ones that had been in the store probably wanted to spank her.

I don't have a dime to my name now, but I did then and it seems if you have money people don't like you and if you have no money they don't like you. Ya can't win.

The kids in cars? OMG it breaks my heart. Those poor babies. No one is perfect and yes in this rushed world, they do forget. One man rushed to work years ago. His wife usually drove the baby to daycare, but had to be at work early. Dad got him in the car and got on the freeway. Traffic, on his way to work, things diverting him and he went to work and later got a call asking why he didn't get the baby to the sitter. He ran out and found his son. That man was devistated while the news showed him going handcuffed into the cop car and sobbing about losing his son and knowing he did it.

Or the grandmother that went to unlock her door, so she could carry her grandchild and groceries inside. She had a seazure and passed out. The 2 or 3 year old died by the time someone noticed her laying on her porch and the car door open. They gave that woman 4 years and she had another siezure and died before they could take her out of the courtroom.

I'm sure there are people who never look away from their kids and keep them under lock and key so they don't get hurt. My kids played and no I didn't stare at them every waking hour. They all grew up to be some pretty awesome people. If anything they're over achievers, so I hope that doesn't make them some lower form of life.

When agencies get calls on people who just aren't paying attention or getting red in the face mad at a 12 year old that should know to stand there and not act up in a store, no matter if the parents aren't centering their attention on him, but yet not clobbering him, they don't have time to save the ones that need them. Like a little boy near where we used to live. They got 10+ calls about the dad beating him. Bruises and they didn't take him. The mother calls from Southern Cal and says she's on her way, can they go pick up her son. She had gotten phone calls from people warning her he wasn't be treated well. They told her there was no evidence. By the time her and her mother got to town she was having to go to the hospital and look at her beaten son, who was there because he got the wrong letters wrong one too many times for his dad. He was 4. He didn't live long enough to see his mommy. The only reason he was with his dad was because a judge said he could have him for 3 months out of the year. His stepmother went to jail too, because while he was being chocked and slammed by his feet while the day slammed his head int othe wall, she just sat and watched.

They didn't save a baby girl who showed up on my husbands shift because every bone and major organ in her body was broken or ruptured. My husband made the papers on that one. It took 7 Sheriffs, security guards and doctors to pull him out of the cop car and off the dad. He did a year. He was released because he told them he was on drugs and didn't know what he was doing.

So much for just agreeing. sorry I was on a roll.

There are so many kids removed from families by agencies that for years have been corrupt. Search the web. Fifty years and they haven't gotten any better. They take the wrong ones and leave the ones who need help. Sometimes the wrong ones and even the ones that should be in the system disappear or are really abused or killed. People think those are few and far between, but they aren't. It happens all the time and when someone rushes to a phone because someone else isn't as perfect a parent as them, the kids pay for it.

We fostered for Denver Social Services for 10 years. I believe DW said we had around 67 kids come through our home. There were a couple out of those that didn't really need to be removed. Minor drug issues. Not dealing or heavy drugs. Just something like pulled over with a little and the kids were put in protective custody. Parents weren't DUI or anything. Kids were placed with us till the parents were investigated and the kids were given back. Traumatic for the kids for sure. The parents do get to visit them and if the parents actually love the kids it is very hard on them too. Fortunately it's a rare occurrence. 98% of the time they are saving the kids.

I can't tell you how many times kids were given up by their parents because drugs and alcohol were a higher priority or they beat their kids. We had a 2 year old that had been kept in her mothers closet for most of her life strapped in a car seat while the mother went to work. Her back was curved and the hair was worn off of her scalp in back. Her grandmother took custody after a couple months after background investigations were complete. We inquired about her a year later when we had the same case worker for a different child. The child was back in foster care for neglect again.

Child services is a very important part of child protection. Many people think of their children as property and that they can treat them however they like. Unfortunately on the very rare occasion that a foster family abuses a child in their care it makes bigger headlines than the father that swings his 12 month old baby around and slams him into the wall a few times because he wouldn't stop crying. Yet, social services is the first place the city cuts when the budget gets tight. Then everyone wants to know why the case workers can't handle shuffling 100 cases a month because half the staff has been cut and the other half is given unpaid time off 6 or 7 times a year. Naturally they work anyway because they can't afford to stay home. They actually care about the kids entrusted to them.

When you foster kids it gives you a real look at how some people treat kids. Physical neglect is usually associated with poverty and drugs. Physical abuse knows no social barriers.

Did anyone see the episode of CSI where this couple had a baby that died of some very rare disease. They had another baby that they thought for some reason had the same disease. The first baby died a horrible death. So the parents gave the new baby an overdose of benadryl and left him in a hot car in Vegas to save it the torment of dying from this disease. Then of course they found out the baby didn't actually have the disease. That was a really hard episode to watch.

All too true, Dunkopf..