I have had it "to here" with my step daughter & don't know what to do.

[Mrs. Glassman]

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I don't know how a mother treats a child...I have no kids & MY mother was to busy with her MALE friends to bother with me.

That's why I am coming here with this... I DON"T KNOW WHAT TO DO. I've already tried EVERY approach I know & that's been mentioned other than walking out & calling this a deal breaker.

 

[Mrs. Glassman]

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I used to call her my daughter all the time. She seemed to thrive on it....as did I. People would even comment that she had my eyes. We would have a laugh over it.

Since this upheaval has began, I do find myself correcting people...even my husband when he calles me their "mom", or them, "Our Kids". I say, "No...I don't have any children....They are his."

Honestly, at this point, she is no more than a boarder in my home. Someone who takes up a bedroom, makes a mess, and wallows in their own filth.

Things were NOT always that way. DH referred to her as my "mini-me". Other people said she was my "shadow" because we were always together, always laughing, and if one of us was having a bad day, the other would try to make it better.

Things USED TO BE GOOD. I guess that is why I'm having such a problem with it. If it had always been that way...I'd chalk it up to normal every day crap.

NOTHING has changed on my part except the fact that I will not kiss up to an individual that thinks stabbing people in the back is the way to get what they want out of life.

Those were not my teachings.
Those are the ones her mother lives by.

 

[debilorrah]

My opinion here. That is all it is. When someone advises you to stop being her friend, they REALLY mean start being a parent. My hubbys kids were not around alot either when we got together, but they are his kids and things change. Life happens. I am not going into the drama in our household with the kids as it is not relevant to this subject. However, when you align yourself with someone with children, those children are always gonna be their kids no matter what, and as a parent they will protect them.

If you want to PM me sometime I can tell you all about the kids mom, who is WAY worse than this lady you describe.

Kids will use manipulation to get their way, especially teens that are influenced from someone unstable. That is life. Then they grow up and apologize 6 ways to Sunday!

 

[redhen]

My question is..What does your DH have to say about all of this?

 

[debilorrah]

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I can imagine he is sitting back processing all this and trying to figure out that the heck to do and feeling helpless. I've seen that look before.

 

[Big C]

Have had somewhat of this problem as a continuing basis with our grandkids. It is still on going after 4 years.
Recently while I was in a book store I picked up a book: "The Shack"
Again, it brought home that many many other people have worse problems than us, and that there is always a way to overcome.

You have been thru a lot and have given your heart and soul for this child.

God Bless you all!!!

 

[debilorrah]

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If anyone ever needs to be reminded that others have it worse than us pick up a book called "A Boy Called It". Heartbreaking and miraculous.

 

[redhen]

The scary part of this for me is..i KNOW what false accusations can do to a person...
they may not be doing anything about them now..BUT..if she gets more creative...you could REALLY be in a mess of trouble. I know..trust me..i know. these false accusations are nothing to play around with...be very careful..

Shes playing real life serious games here..not once..but 3 times now...

 

[Mrs. Glassman]

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[debilorrah]

I think it may be easier for you to hear words of advice once you have calmed down and the mad is a little less RAWR. Seriously. I know you wanted to vent, and several of us would like to help... Maybe take a day or two to process it all and come back and re-read the posts.