I just found two more dead, I'm losing it. Update post #32.

[Chickengal505]

I know how you feel, people don't listen to me because I'm am a minor, and my chickens suffer because people think I'm a stupied teenager and that I can't take care of my own birds. Make signs, DO NOT TOUCH THE EGGS, DO NOT TOUCH RAMP/BIRDS, DO NOT FEED THE DUCKS ect. I had to put employ only signs on my nesting boxs and had to lock my feed so people wouldn't over feed my chickens, had to lock my chick coop door so people wouldn't hold them to death ( my dad owns a trailer park and my chickens live over there, I live about 1/2 mile away. Some of our residents have young grand-children) Our best residents have a grown son who has a HUGE boxer/bull dog mix. I told him he could NOT let the dog out un-survised because I had all my chickens out free ranging. He lets the dog run around without a leash and walks into the house. He comes back out when he's ready to leave and asks me have I seen his dog

I told him if he ever let his dog out like that again I would call animal control OR tie him to a post myself. If that doesn't work call the police and file a report for tampering with YOUR belongings. I hope you okay. i've read alot of your posts and I'm so sorry this has happened to you. If you need to vent, vent we know your not yelling at us

 

[elizabethbinary]

Quote:
Yeah it's complicated. The people staying with me are homeless and staying with me until their house is rebuilt (it was destroyed in a terrible event). It seems the builders keep getting waylaid though.. there's 3 of them - one of them is smart, helpful, kind, an ex-farmer and always on time with rent, always offering more money etc etc, and he supports the other two. I don't normally mind the other two because the third makes up the slack. It SUCKS and I feel for the poor guy but those are his responsibilities and he chose to take care of them. They are really lazy, no jobs, on the dole and have no sense of workmanship or effort.

The proble seems to be when the other two people do anything, they really REALLY do it half-arse. I wouldn't be surprised if the took the ramp out because it made the pond easier to fill, put it that way. One of them seems to purposefully forget which ducks/chickens are going in the pot and starts fawning and obsessing over the ones that do in some weird hope I think she thinks I won't kill them if she does (ha!). The other tried to build me a coop and failed and I had to take over from there because otherwise all the nails would've stabbed my chickens to death, there were so many exposed ones (over 100). Neither of them work or put forth much effort into anything they do - they simply don't appear to have any pride?

Thing is, other than that they really are lovely. Kind and thoughtful and give me random gifts and sortof in their own way *try*, but just don't seem to actually care about the results. When I had to redo the coop, the female couldn't understand why it 'wasn't good enough for chickens'... because it can kill them? "Oh is that important?".....yeah, a little. These two just seem so completely oblivious to the realities of life... except they are kind, nice, whathaveyou and respectful of me except when it comes to their laziness.

If I ask one to do a chore, they will make the working paying man do it instead of them. He HATES it, but it's his choice. As long as it gets done I can't really get ticked because HE did it and not them if he's paying their way, right?

But I can get ticked they ignore my warningns on m animals. Which is what I plan on doing when they wake up (aren't I kind for waiting?).

I feel bad because the guy is SO grateful to stay here and I think he's becoming highly aware the other two are screwing it up for him... he LOVES it here... he used to live on a farm and he's a hard worker (like us, we're workaholics) and people take advantage of him all the time (like us) so we all have this 3-way mutual understanding and respect while the other two just seem to live life watching TV, playing video games and screwing with the order of the house.

They've only been here a month, so it's still new territory. They're quick to fix things when I complain, but I also need them to listen BEFORE I need to complain. It always seems to need to get to a boiling point before they go, "Ah crud I should stop what I'm doing and show some pride in my work."

I don't get it, I really don't... otherwise they're a lovely bunch.

I am SO SORRY you lost your baby. *hug* And I'm sorry your husband is like mine and forgets to ask you if you're okay. Are you okay? I'm so sorry.

 

[elizabethbinary]

Quote:
You POOR THING. That was ONE thing I never missed about my childhood (and two billion other things). I never understood when adults said I should enjoy it while it lasted... as a kid NOBODY listens to you! NOBODY takes you seriously!! IT SUCKS.

I'm so sorry you have to go through that!! I bet you can't wait until you're older (and know the SAME EXACT STUFF) and people listen. It's a shame. Adults complain children never listen to them... but adults rarely listen to kids either!!! Blah. Pet peeve of mine, sorry. (Didn't mean to call you a child, either, haha)

Thank you.

 

[Chickengal505]

Ya I hate not being listened to. I've cussed out residents before becaue they wouldn't leave my chickens alone. I've told more than one if they mess with my chickens again they would get kicked out. I would tell the (sorta) free loaders that the working guy is not going to work for them anymore. Be nice but frim. Ask the working resident not to do anything for the others unless it's somthing that THEY asked him to do, not somthing YOU asked THEM to do. If they keep on,talk to them again. once again signs are a good idea. Don't adress the signs to them just let them "pop" up every day or so untill you feel you got your message across

just my $0.02 worth good luck and I hope your dealing with this well. We are here for you, we all support you and feel your pain, and if you ever need to talk or vent were here

 

[lil'turkeymama]

I'm so sorry you're having to go though this difficult time.I understand how upsetting it can be.I'm glad you can come here and vent and get some relief by sharing with other folks who understand how this makes us critters people feel.
I've had similar problems with neighbors wanting to feed/pet my horses.My lastest neighbors told me they knew folks that had horses so they knew about horses,too.I thought well thats nice you knew someones horses but that doesn't mean you know mine.I had a older mustang stallion at the time and he would protect his herd by running anything or anybody out of the pasture.I caught these neighbors in my pasture about a week after they moved here petting a very gentle gelding with 3 very small childern falling around the geldings feet.I went down there and told them they were lucky they happen to be petting this certain horse because he was so mellow and while I was explaining they should never ever get in my fence again the mustang stallion came charging at us.I had been watching to see how close he was while they crawled back under my electic fence.They would never have been able to get out of the way if i hadn't seen what was about to happen.I'm sure it scared them pretty good and I haven't seen them in my pasture again.Just more proof that some folks don't know how to act/behave or care for someone elses animals.I don't take vacations either because I don't trust anyone to look after my animals.
I agree with posting signs around your stuff and making sure your guests understand what they can or cannot do to "help".I wouldn't be too mad at your DH,they sometimes really don't get how we feel about our critters.They don't have the motherly feeling we have toward the ones we raise ourselves.It didn't sound like he was trying to be mean,he just didn't get it.
I hope all goes well with your talking to you have planned for the guests.

And keep your chin up,things will get better.

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

To the OP,
You need to assign charts to ALL three of the people living with you. Let them know that THEY must do the assigned chore, not someone else--that you have tried to divide the chores fairly (and do so, taking into account the "talents" of each of your house"guests"). If the two will not do their assigned chores, let them know that they will no longer be able to live there--pulling their weight is REQUIRED. Be very clear on your expectations: Your task is to set the table for dinner every day by X o'clock, to fix a salad for dinner--here is where I keep lettuce, tomoatoes, etc. or You rjob is to clean up after dinner: this includes clearing the table, putting away the food and washing all dishes, then wiping the table clean. or Your job is to vacuum the house daily by 4 pm. Every room with a carpet, and sweep the floor for those with wood or tile floors. Etc.

Make it very clear to them what things are OFF LIMITS to them. Given what you have described, I would make all the animals completely off limits to at least the two, and likely all three. Use locks if you need to. If you ever see them going near anything you have made off limits, very clearly and explicitly tell them that this is not something they are allowed to do, and if you find them in or near the area again, they will have to move out. Don't just be polite and say--"no, no, don't do that," be very upfront on confronting their breach of boundaries, and the consequences. You and your husband need to be in agreement on the boundaries. It sounds as if they do not realize that there ARE boundaries, they are GUESTS, not equal partners in your home.

Digging holes for burial can be an assigned chore, but it honestly sounds to me like there is far mroe death than there should be: a freezer full! and now another freezer full?!

Chickens recover amazingly from injury; I really doubt you needed to kill the duck. Next time there is an injury (hoping, of course for never), try letting the bird recover. The Emergency section here has a lot of good information.

Men usually aren't too good with "feelings." And certainly not when they have not been told "I need this." Men tend to want to fix things: bring them a problem and their natural instinct is to find a solution, not to console and commiserate and ask about your feelings. Your husband likely KNOWS how badly you feel--asking how you feel doesn't make sense to him--trying to keep you from ever having to feel that way again does make sense to him, and is a typical male approach. If you NEED him to hold you and ask about your feelings, you must tell him; if is not something he would know to do on his own.

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

Quote:
Unless your dad has a rule that requires animals to be on leashes, the tenant is within his rights to bring his dog outside. That said, you probably shouldn't be free ranging your birds. Be proactive and build them a pen where they can safely roam.

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

lil'turkeymama :

I'm so sorry you're having to go though this difficult time.I understand how upsetting it can be.I'm glad you can come here and vent and get some relief by sharing with other folks who understand how this makes us critters people feel.
I've had similar problems with neighbors wanting to feed/pet my horses.My lastest neighbors told me they knew folks that had horses so they knew about horses,too.I thought well thats nice you knew someones horses but that doesn't mean you know mine.I had a older mustang stallion at the time and he would protect his herd by running anything or anybody out of the pasture.I caught these neighbors in my pasture about a week after they moved here petting a very gentle gelding with 3 very small childern falling around the geldings feet.I went down there and told them they were lucky they happen to be petting this certain horse because he was so mellow and while I was explaining they should never ever get in my fence again the mustang stallion came charging at us.I had been watching to see how close he was while they crawled back under my electic fence.They would never have been able to get out of the way if i hadn't seen what was about to happen.I'm sure it scared them pretty good and I haven't seen them in my pasture again.Just more proof that some folks don't know how to act/behave or care for someone elses animals.I don't take vacations either because I don't trust anyone to look after my animals.
I agree with posting signs around your stuff and making sure your guests understand what they can or cannot do to "help".I wouldn't be too mad at your DH,they sometimes really don't get how we feel about our critters.They don't have the motherly feeling we have toward the ones we raise ourselves.It didn't sound like he was trying to be mean,he just didn't get it.
I hope all goes well with your talking to you have planned for the guests.

And keep your chin up,things will get better.

I strongly disagree about men not feeling the same amount of emotions as women--they just tend to respond differently.​

 

[Chickengal505]

Quote:
Unless your dad has a rule that requires animals to be on leashes, the tenant is within his rights to bring his dog outside. That said, you probably shouldn't be free ranging your birds. Be proactive and build them a pen where they can safely roam.

The man does not live at my dads park (he was visiting his parents) and me and my dad have told him my birds free range while I'm present and the dog will NOT be permitted to run free without supervistion. My birds are only out while I am there. He left his dog unattened and we told him NOT to. That made me mad an I told him that.

 

[Chickengal505]

I have a large coop and run and I let them out to dust bathe on fresh un-poopy dirt.