I need some help, advice - not chicken related

[debilorrah]

My mom is the least of it really - it's just one more thing on the pile. I am picking her stuff up on the way home and taking it to her tomorrow on my lunch break - she can feed me too and she is about 2 minutes from my office. My biggest issue is with the kids. They KNOW their dad is sick and it hurts to move. So they bang on the bedroom when he is sleeping. How do you teach people respect? I haven't known them all that long, but it is clear they have no respect for others needs or wishes. And they are not BAD kids, they are fun, loving, kind. It's just the very house!

WOW - I have ranted today. Please forgive these huge posts.

 

[herbandteas]

I have a DH who has been in and out of the hospital in the last year. My work schdule went from being at work at 8am to being at work at 5am now it is at 5pm to 11pm which works a lot better for me as I can do what ever I want during the day. I have a teen at home who is in her last yr of high school She keeps texting me during the day asking me to do things for her which of course I am busy doing things I need to do so I usually tell her she is on her own because after 3 daugthers I have finally gotten to the point where if you are almost 18 you better start taking care of yourself more because Mom has a life too.

I am the rock in my family and so it is not to say that I do get the same way as you do so at least once a week I go off by myself to do things I want to do. You just have to tell them I need time for myself. I agree with telling your mom that you have a day for shopping and to make a list and you will get her stuff then.

 

[andehens]

No advice, just an understanding hug, well........ it would be if I knew how to make those smiley hugs.

 

[Chicabee19]

read all of that above, but from me.

(i really feel for you - you need someone to do something nice for you). Huggies

just like wiping their butts when they were little,,,, could you imagine if you never made em do it on their own.

HA HA HA!

good one, and sooo true!​

 

[debilorrah]

I can't tell you how nice it is to read all these comments. And honestly? I don;t really need me time, I need time with my fiance without the bs and the kids knocking on the door all the time. I came home tonight and the kitchen was clean, but not the floor..... Anyhow, apparently he came home for lunch today and made his own mess. Threw the wrappers on the floor, the knife across the room, left the mayo out and placed the lid across the room, etc. Then he went ballistic on the kids "HOW DOES IT FEEL???" He made them clean up everything, including the spam juice he drained on the cabinets. He was PO'd!!!! It felt good to come home and talk to him. He has my back, we just need to kick some respect into these children!!!!!

 

[d.k]

* Whoa! Ya'll are tougher than me. . .I was gonna suggest paper plates and Taco Bell!!

 

[debilorrah]

HAHAHA! We do that too! Upon occasion. I made it clear tonight that I was only cooking for me and my fiance until this place was clean - and I stuck to it. We had tacos and the rest got cleaned up by me before anyone could say "BUFFET".

 

[BFeathered]

First, BIG HUGS. Next, great fiance! It's great that he's got your back. Now.... Yes, you DO need time to yourself, and remember "if Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!" You are Mama, right? You take care of you first, fiance 2nd and get social services/meals on wheels to help out with mom. She's entitled to it if she's disabled, and no, it's not charity. (my stubborn-butt great grandma was a real pistol that way) My 11yo daughter is more responsible than those kids! (of course that's probably about to change, here come the teen years- ack) 1much has the right idea- I used to take my slob-roommate's weekold dirty dishes and put them in her bed! And kept 1 set of dishes/silverware in my room. I also put her wet towels and nasty clothes in a trash bag and put that in her bed too. She got the hint, and didn't speak to me for weeks (aahhh, blissful silence). The 19yos need to be treated like the legal adults they are. Get a job, pay rent, help the family or GET OUT. Now I'm ranting. Sorry. Just so tired of seeing people trampled by their own good intentions. Again, big hugs.

 

[babyboy1_mom]

Hi Debi. I am sorry that you are still having a difficult time with lifes ups and downs. You and your family are still in my prayers and will remain there.

As for the kids, stick to your guns. If you let them get away with not doing chores around the house, then they will lay on their butts and do nothing. It is something that has to be done on a daily basis. If you let them slide today, then they will want to slide tomorrow and the day after. You get the picture.

I hope and pray that these burdens will be lifted from your shoulders soon. I also hope that your fiance's biopsy is negative.

Good luck and keep your faith.

Dorothy

 

[debilorrah]

Everyone has been so awesome! Whoever posted about the dishes in the bed? I have been doing that for years. My son wound up sleeping with a trash bad full of onions and scraps from Thanksgiving because he didnt take the trash out. The 19 yo stepdaughter rebels. I put her nasty dish on her bed and she promptly put the bowl in the dutch over along with sandwich crusts and wrappers from cigarette packs. Not a good day that day. HAHAHA~!