I really don't like my neighbor!!!!

Ok - this is a rant because if I don't rant and vent to you all I am going to drag my neighbor kicking and screaming and throw him head first into a mountain of carefully collected chicken turds! Then I am going to lock him in the hen house so my girls can use him as a roost and poop in his eye sockets! - As you all know I am a very fluffy none aggressive kind of Oesdog - but this latest turn of events has left me boiling inside and I just want to tear great pieces of this guys backside off and feed him to my girls chunk by chunk!

It all started about two years ago. We bought our lovely new house outright and thought this was a great place to be. It was lovely and had a private back yard where no one could overlook us. We valued that particularly as we have a very handicapped son who likes to go outside and have privacy. I also have Fibromyalga and on my bad days I certainly don;t like folk gawking when I start to look like an old lady all bent over and shuffling about like I am 93! So this was a great space. We lived in the city before and this was a wonderful change from that. DH and I had grown up in the countryside so this was a great opportunity to recapture that way of life. The kids had all moved out and left schools etc so we had no reason to stay in the city and were keen to make the best of the move.

Then to our horror one day we came home to find our neighbor had gotten one of those kiddie towers and although they have a great big yard chose to biuld it feet from our fence. The other side of their property looks out on a big field but NO - they decide they want it on our fence line. Next thing we have not only their kid up the tower looking down but also the two adults gawking directly into the back of our house. So in the nice long summer evenings when we would normally be enjoying the privacy of our conservatory we would look up to find these folk gawking in at us. Or worse of all when our son was out in the yard their healthy child would go up his tower and start yelling " err misses whats the matter with your kid?????" Ahhhhhhhhhh !!!!!!!! When we have family BBQs etc often the neighbors kid would get up his tower just to be noisy and start demending what we were doing!!!!!! Anyhow this got very frustrating but we couldn't demand they moved the tower to the other side of their property because no planning consent is needed for a tempory structure here so we can't do much about it!!!!! Other than grow something big and hope it blocks their view!!! So it was goodbye to the privacy we so loved when we first arrived.

Next thing - when I got a serious cancer scare DH got me my lovely hens to keep my mind off things. So I joined BYC and my mad love afair with chickens began. We have a run down the side of the house that butts up against the neighbors fence! (Well hay we back on to a Farm what does he expect????) Anyhow we hear them complaining about the nasty smelly darn birds! (They have a big shed the other side of where our run is so they can't exactly see into the run anyhow!!!) He can't do anything because its on our land and we are legally allowed to keep chickens - also it is a tempory structure which does not need planning permision just like his tower! Then we borrowed another neighbors Rooster and hatched some eggs. ( Loads of the neighbors have chickens and some have roos) But we had to send the roo boy back after 2 weeks cause the neighbor complained and said he would get the council on us. - We didn;t want bother because a good lot of the nice neighbors have hens and roosters and the last thing we needed was a cull of chickens/Roos cause he complained. Our road is residential but it butts onto a farm with all sorts of farm animals. We couldn't understand why this fellow would buy a house butting onto a working farm and complain about farmyard noises. Anyhow so to keep the peace when our roo boy chicks grew up we found homes for them as soon as they started to crow. Then the neighbor got himself a Dog and he lets the darn animal bark all day long and into the small hours even though there are tiny kids in the house the others side of him ( Oh yes and they have just gooten themselves a rooster!!! HA HA) and we have a disabled young person who finds sleep hard. Consequently we rarely are able to sit out or enjoy our conservatory as we have endless barking!( At least the Roo boys shut up sometimes!!!!) We have kept our cool for a good while over this and have not reported him to the council yet as we didn't want to start a war with him as their house is for sale and we had hoped they would "move!".

The last few days we've been working in the yard as we are having a big party for our grandaughters first birthday soon. We have been painting the fences and doing bits and pieces. We have cleared the chicken run and coop and put another pannel on the rear of it to block it in and create a better safer run. We have taken the shed the girls used for their roosts away as we lost a hen and had another injured in it recently. We don't know what they hurt themselves on so we just removed it. They have another chicken house now that is safer but smaller. So we thought to ourselves we will move the old shed out of the run and put it further up the garden. It can be used to house the chicken feed and gardening tools. So DH and our son, daughter and SIL worked at that. It is all now finished and in the places we wanted. We were out in the yard and next thing the neighbor is up against the fence! We over hear them talking and complaining about our Hens and how dirty and horrible and smelly they are?????? Then he is complaining about the wild birds that come and sit on the top of the run. They obviously like it there and think they can get a free meal of chicken feed. So they poo occationally around the top of the run. We hose it all down and clean it completely at least twice a year. As you all can understand I don't have much controle over the toilet habbits of the local wildlife! Its not as if I can start issuing starling nappies? Next the fellow starts complaining that WE moved our SHED on OUR land in our yard!!!!!!! So he is allowed privacy - WE ARE NOT!!!! He is allowed a tower with screaming unruly kids calling out but were are NOT ALLOWED TO MOVE OUR QUIET SHED????? He can have a loud dog barking at all hours of the day and night BUT WE ARE NOT ALLOWED A ROOSTER WHO CROWS OCCATIONALLY AND APPARENTLY WE HAVE TO CONTROL ALL THE LOCAL WILD BIRDS AS WELL AS PERFUMING OUR HENS DAILY????? I mean give me a break! There are cows crapping in the back paddock behind his house and bellowing all the time and a donkey making a racket but he zones in on our hens??????

So I am at the stage of getting the birds to attack him like in the Alfred Hitchcock movie! Just to mess him up a bit and maybe peck an eye ball from his head!!!!!!
I am really mad because the guy is so up his own rear and thinks he somehow owns our yard as well as his own!!!!! Fancy complaining that we moved the shed a few feet up our own yard???? - Thing is it blocks his view so he can't look through the fence at us and that is what is really upsetting the nosy old sod!!!

End of Rant - so what do you reckon. If he was your neighbor what would you do?????

Oesdog

 

Thanks he is driving me mad - I do occationally walk round the conservatory in my birthday suit cause its real hot in there and its not my fault if his horrible child decides to gawk into my house is it????

DH doesn;t like confrontation though so I have to be good. - Though I am not at all the good fluffy avatar oesdog!!!! I feel more like a Rottweiler in a fluffy fur coat!!! Gurrrr!

Oesdog