If you care to hear the rants/troubles of a young adult.

[Lothiriel]

First off, I'm really getting fed up with the fact that I've had my permit for 2 years and have barely been allowed to drive, so I don't have my license yet and not because I am irresponsible, it's just because my mom doesn't feel like letting me drive. 3 of my friends who are younger than I have their licenses already. I'm getting very sick of it.

Second, my mom keeps getting really mad at me for "not doing my share" of things around the house. Well, I'm sorry, but when there are 3 adult women in one house, it's a bit hard to get a chance at doing my share, so just because I am slower at seeing things that need to be done does not give you the right to do what you just did.

She hurt my feelings the worst she ever has. Cut me to the quick. I am usually very easy-going and can take a lot of things without getting terribly upset. But when I started a nice conversation about sometime all of us sitting down to discuss days I could work so I can finish my job application (since I have no license), she completely downed it all by telling me that I'd never get hired because I can't even do stuff at home, so why bother applying.

Now, I can take all the times she and my older sister tell me I am terrible at housework. But when she said that, I felt like she stabbed me. I really want this job! I want to have my own source of income! I want to become more independent! My sister has 2 jobs -- both with her musical skills. Why can't I apply for a job that suits me and lets me use my love of math? I tell you, I'm getting so tired of it!

Thanks for listening.

 

[Poultrybonkers]

My permit exspired since everyone in my family is a liar. So i feel your pain there
I cant even get a job because i would need someone to take me and since my mom only cares for her beer shes slurps down not about me then she complains about money. I wish i could move out but i dont have money to. So i feel your pain.

 

[sfw2]

No advice, just

 

[redhen]

If you are an adult, why not move out of the house?? Have your friends with the license help you learn to drive .. etc...
Sometimes you have to take these steps into adulthood by yourself... sadly, not all parents are helpful. Just think of all the kids out there with wicked bad parents that dont do a THING for them... when they turn into adults they someone manage to survive and make it on their own...
You can do it too!!

And i dont know how badly you do or dont do your chores at home..but i know from experience some of what she says is true...
I have had kids that are more "motivated" and get things done correctly and when they NEED to be done... and they got jobs and were able to KEEP those jobs...

I have also had kids that are pretty lazy and want to watch t.v. or etc... all day long... and they have their big dreams of getting a job...
Until they actually do get the job and realize they actually have to WORK to get paid

..and not just work.. but work WELL, and do the job the way the BOSS wants it done...
Sooo, if you really cant do those things at home like your mother says.... you really might have a hard time at a real job. I dont know...maybe not..
Either way though, it IS something that you HAVE to learn for yourself... you have to get experience somehow...
Sorry, just being honest with you.... maybe give you something to think about..
BUT again, i do NOT really know the whole story here..

ETA: Can you pay a friend with a license or their parents to take you back and forth to work until you SAVE enough money for your own car??

 

[Royd]

I know this probably seems harsh to the generation who thinks that an automobile is mandatory equipment to get a job...Bicycles can be pedalled quite easily, 4-6 miles, without breaking a sweat, in about 25 minutes. Just do it.

 

[redhen]

Quote:
Thats how they used to do it...
you have to do what you have to do sometimes..
Use a bike until you save enough for a car...

 

[Lothiriel]

I can't move out of the house because I have no way to afford renting anything. If my friends lived around here, I would do just what you said. But 1 is in VA, and the other 2 live about an hour away.

Lately, no, I haven't been trying as hard as I can to do chores. I have been Christmas shopping online, on ebay, so I've been spending a good deal of time "locked away" in my room. But most of the time I do try. But there aren't a whole lot of things to do around here, and by the time I think, "Hey I'll do that!" I'll go and find that they have already done it or are in the process.

I fully understand that I need to work to get paid. I do not expect to sit around and do nothing. I have had to change the ways I do things around the house because my way is not the way my mom would do it. So I believe I will be able to do the same at a job. This is the job I have been waiting to apply for for at least 2 years. It really hurt to have her tell me she doesn't think I'm worth it.

 

[Lothiriel]

Quote:
Thats how they used to do it...
you have to do what you have to do sometimes..
Use a bike until you save enough for a car...

I would. But I live 5 miles outside the city, on the other side of "The Mountain." People don't even like to drive their vehicles over The Mountain too much.

 

[redhen]

I can imagine that it hurt you.. and i'm sorry for that..

Also, it doesnt sound like she doesnt think that you are'nt "worth it".... it sounded like she was just concerned that if you cant seem to do things at home... a job may be too much for you right now...
Thats how i took it anyways...
But i wasnt there and i dont know your mom...

 

[redhen]

And what did you say when she said that to you??
Did you ask her again if they can help you get to work?? That you are REALLY serious about it...
Did you tell her that you would pay her gas money for bringing you back and forth??..