If you don't appreciate chickens, you don't appreciate me!!

[Desirai]

I was seeing a guy for a little while. Like maybe a grand total of a month or 2. We went on some dates, talked a lot on the phone.

He told me a few days ago that he had started seeing someone else. I was insulted and asked why he didn't want to see me anymore?

"Too much of your free time revolves around your chickens"

PFFFT. THEN I'LL FIND A MAN WHO APPRECIATES CHICKENS.

Jerk!

Sorry just had to rant.

 

[Baymule]

Best places to meet hot guys:

Chicken swaps
Chicken shows
Farmers Markets
Chicken meets
Livestock sale barns
Hatcheries
Feed stores
Funky chicken coop tour Austin Tx
Tractor Supply
State Fair
County fair
FFA or 4-H shows
Did i mention chicken shows???????

Who needs a loser that does not like chickens??????

 

[Desirai]

I would love to go to a chicken meet/swap/show/whatever! But I only know about one and it's almost a 6 hr drive from here.

 

[OldGuy43]

I like chickens, but I'm spoken for. Sorry!

"I know all about your standards and if you don't mind my sayin' so there's not a man alive who could hope to measure up to that blend of Paul Bunyan, Saint Pat, and Noah Webster you've concocted for yourself out of your Irish imagination, your Iowa stubbornness, and your li'berry full of books!"
~ Mrs. Paroo, The Music Man ~

 

[Oregon Blues]

Just so you know, it is common for men to move on after a date or two, so it might not even have anything to do with your chickens. Just a guy who doesn't want to make a commitment.

Unless you are wackadoodle crazy about your hobby, like the chicken version of the crazy cat lady, a man who thinks you are really "it" for him will put up with your hobbies.

Relationships are easier with common interests, so a partner who is also interested in farming, or poultry would be nice. But find the right guy and he will tolerate your chickens if you tolerate whatever his hobby is. Perhaps race cars or collecting power tools or comic books. Putting up with each other's quirks is part of the compromise that has to happen.

 

[Desirai]

Well yeah... I'm still very young so I imagine it will be tough for me to find a guy who is ready to be in a committed relationship at this age. But still.....

 

[Bunnylady]

"Too much of your free time revolves around your chickens"

Translation: "Not enough of your free time revolves around me."

Sorry, guys, but I calls 'em like I sees 'em! I'm not saying that this guy is just an egocentric jerk (although he might be, for all I know!) but an awful lot of people get insecure about anything that they see as "competition" for the attention that they want. That's one of the great things about shared interests - you can spend time with someone you are interested in, and something you are interested in, at the same time! But as Oregon Blues said, someone who is really interested in you, accepts the whole package.

 

[Oregon Blues]

Desirai, you will find, as you go through life, that a person who breaks off a relationship will always rationalize that it is the other person's fault. People will very rarely take responsibility for their own choices or actions.

If he thinks it can't be his own fault, then it has to be your fault, and your chickens are just an easy excuse and a rationalization. The truth is that he wants to gather as many women as he can, and he had another opportunity and he took it. That happens to be a guy thing and it very common with younger guys. Immature men tend measure their own value by how large a "herd" they can amass.

Even though you are the one who was left, it really has nothing to do with you. I suggest that you consider yourself out easily since he broke it off instead of trying to string you along while collecting the next girl, too, so he can have more than one at a time. That, unfortunately, can also be a guy thing.

On the placing blame game, you will soon find out that anyone (male or female) who wants out of a relationship will often start a lot of fights. Then they can leave because the other person is "so unreasonable and hard to get along with"

If that is your own photo, then you are a darling with a sweet face. When you smile, you must look very warm and caring. That's valuable. Hold yourself in high esteem and hold out for a guy who actually deserves you. Don't ever settle for a cad because you think that is the best you can do. Because there are decent men out there who treasure their mates.

Good luck to you.

 

[primalchick]

I'm very lucky my husband loves animals as well. He grew up with chickens and it was actually his idea for us to get some chicks, which I am soooo happy he suggested it! Try not to let this hurt your feelings any. You'll likely go through a few lemons before finding the right guy for you Most of us do!

 

[punk-a-doodle]

First off

Break ups almost always hurt and just plain suck.

That said, they are great for learning where you want to go in life, and who you want along for the ride. The thing that helped me most after a break up (after a good rant session/blowing off steam that is) was being asked to look at what happened and what it meant; to see both sides. That helped me be ready for a deeply committed relationship when it did happen. In this case, it sounds like he was upfront and honest with you about wanting to pursue a relationship with someone else, and answered with a logical reason when asked why it didn't work out so you weren't left wondering. Differing interests happen, and most people don't date with the intent of being in a deeply committed relationship off the bat (Though it might turn into that. And if that is important to someone, things like that are important to state upfront. Ie. "If we date, I want to date exclusively/go steady/whatever"). Dating is a great way to see if personalities and values click, and in this case, they did not. That doesn't mean anything bad about you...or about him, it just means that you two have different directions you want to go in. As an added plus, you both found that out early rather than later. What it also means is that you now better understand some things that are really important to you when looking at a relationship. You now know that finding someone else passionate about chickens means the other person is less likely to feel left out as you will be able to do chicken-related things together. That said, you might find someone who doesn't like chickens, but where you two can compromise and understand each other to the point where it doesn't keep you from having a wonderful relationship. Lots of possibilities, and it is a journey to find out which ones end up working for you.