I'm being mean, ain't I? (Sorry, long)

[SallyF]

They have a dog that is NOT housebroken, brought it to your house, and let it run loose??!!! There's your answer right there. No one should have to put up with that. When I brought my latest rescue home and found that he wasn't housebroken, he got a crate the next day and stayed in it until his housebreaking was complete. You are not being mean at all.

 

[gritsar]

I should mention that DH has grown wise to the #2's true self and has really distanced himself from her, as much as I know that hurts him.
He was really looking forward to seeing #1 and especially the GS, but he has said he's not happy about the way they treat me. DH is very non-confrontational though, and although he'll say something to them he rarely follows through.
He put up with their mother treating him basically the same way these girls do for 27 years. He admits that the girls are just like her, but they are the only bio family he has left in the world.
I will off-handedly mention the text, but too late for anything to be done about it. It is imperative that some things get done this weekend, like hunting down the part and fixing the farm truck. Plus, I just discovered a burst pipe in the pump house. DH can't tell his girls no, so I'm going to have to do it.

 

[PineappleMama]

Sounds like a plan.

I'd reply to the text "Your dad and I discussed it and we have too much to do this weekend, maybe some other time."

Totally true, not leaving them hanging, so you aren't in any way being mean or lying... and if you include that it's already been discussed and decided they might, MIGHT, not try and bully your poor DH.

Bonus: if asked, the delay in your reply wasn't cuz you were ignoring the brats it was because you wanted an open and honest conversation with your spouse before answering one way or the other because in your relationship you're equals and make decisions together... who can find fault with THAT... mwahaha.

 

[HorseFeatherz NV]

Mean?


Did you kick them in the shin? Poke them in the eye? Let their little dog out to be eaten by coyotes? Pack little dog logs in their car?



Please, I have yet to hear you be mean to them. Sounds to me like you are planning your weekend.

 

[PineappleMama]

Quote:

Should they decide to turn up anyways, or another time and do the same as last I would definitely vote for dog log delivery.

Wonder how long they'd be glaring at each other with that "I can't believe you just farted and didn't even crack a window" look before they finally realized it was the dog.

 

[Ema]

I honestly do not think you are being mean or selfish in any way, they obviously have no manners and don't appreciate much. You have every right to feel and act the way you are. They certainly should have enough sense to give you advance notice and when in your household abide by the rules you set forth. I would tell #1 that next time the dog is to stay outdoors unless she conforms to keeping him the kitchen like you originally told her. And that they need to pick up after themselves as you are not their housekeeper/maid or cook whichever one you prefer.

MY BIL and SIL are like that too. If they ever show their faces round here again, which is very doubtful, there is a nice hotel in town. And I sure will not be grocery shopping with them once they are in town as last time they were here they filled the cart with all kinds of things and then expected me to pay for it at the checkout. Needless to say half of the items in the cart stayed in the cart. I am not mean and I am very hospitable, but I can sense when family is just taking advantage of the situation.

Ema

And I agree with pinneaplemama, I would text them back and tell them exactly that, or otherwise you risk them showing up and souring your weekend with your hunny.

 

[HHandbasket]

You are not at all being mean. However, I wouldn't ignore her... you have to pick up at some point and tell her no. THe last thing you need is her showing up unexpectedly.

 

[Judy]

Quote:
X2

 

[pips&peeps]

Mean would have been sticking the "leavins" on your floor in her purse while she wasn't looking to take along as she left.

 

[cafarmgirl]

pips&peeps :

Mean would have been sticking the "leavins" on your floor in her purse while she wasn't looking to take along as she left.

But that's not mean, that's just payback, karma, you get what you give, etc. etc.!

But, as a couple other people mentioned, I would get back to her with a definite NO just so they don't just show up. You don't even need to give a reason after that behavior, just "Sorry, not this weekend."​