Joke - For all Native Texans or anyone that wants to be one

Discussion in 'Random Ramblings' started by Patchofheaven, Feb 5, 2008.

  1. Patchofheaven

    Patchofheaven Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Jul 18, 2007
    Conroe, TX
    You are a Texan If:

    1. You can properly pronounce Corsicana,
    Palestine , Decatur, Wichita Falls, Houston, San
    Antonio, Burnet, Boerne, Nacogdoches,
    Mexia, Waco, Amarillo, and Waxahachie.

    2. A tornado warning siren is your signal to
    go out in the yard and look for a funnel.

    3. You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.

    4. You know that the true value of a parking
    space is not determined by the distance
    to the door, but by the availability of shade.

    5. Stores don't have bags, they have sacks.

    6. You see people wear bib overalls at funerals.

    7. You measure distance in minutes.

    8. Little Smokies are something you serve only for special occasions.

    9. You go to the lake because you think it is like going to the ocean.

    10. You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit

    11. You know cow-pies are not made of beef.

    12.. Someone you know has used a football
    schedule to plan their wedding date.

    13. You have known someone who has had a
    belt buckle bigger than your fist.

    14. You aren't surprised to find movie rental,
    ammunition, and bait all in the same store.

    15. Your "place at the lake" has wheels under it.

    16. A Mercedes Benz is not a status symbol; a Ford F350 4x4 is.

    17. You know everything goes better with Ranch dressin'.

    18. You learned how to shoot a gun before you learned how to multiply.

    19. You actually understand this and you are
    "fixin' to" send it to your friends.

    20. Finally, you are 100% Texan if you have
    ever heard this conversation:
    " You wanna coke?"
    "Yep."
    "What kind?"
    "Dr. Pepper."

    Have a Great Day!
     
  2. Cuban Longtails

    Cuban Longtails Flock Mistress

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    Sep 20, 2007
    Northeast Texas
    [​IMG] Texas RoCkS!!! [​IMG]
     
  3. NewGuineaChooks

    NewGuineaChooks Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Aug 24, 2007
    San Antonio, Texas
    I love it! Some are a bit 'silly' in my personal version of texas, but I love the shaded parking space one!

    I'd add to to the place-name list: Palacios

    I'd change Ranch dressing to Salsa. (my family& friends harass our 'Northern' relatives that put ranch on their tortillas!!)

    21. You know someone who drove the 2hrs to stock up on Real Dr. Pepper made with Imperial sugar instead of syrup.

    22. You automatically do the "Fire-Ant 2-step" when standing on grass.
     
  4. ilovemychickies

    ilovemychickies Chillin' With My Peeps

    LOL! Those are all so true! Thanks for posting that! [​IMG]
     
  5. Cuban Longtails

    Cuban Longtails Flock Mistress

    6,026
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    Sep 20, 2007
    Northeast Texas
    Quote:They had the Real Dr. Pepper at the local Wal-Mart for awhile, that's some good stuff!
     
  6. Lunachick

    Lunachick Chicken Slave

    Mar 19, 2007
    Brick, NJ
    [​IMG] The fire ant two step can be done in Florida too!
     
  7. MissChessy

    MissChessy Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Sep 24, 2007
    Texas
    yeah, can you pronounce Refugio? It sounds like reverio. We say "ain't" a lot too. Nothing beats TEXAS!
     
  8. Blisschick

    Blisschick not rusty

    Feb 20, 2007
    Shepherd, Texas
    You know you're from the Houston area:

    1. if you can say Sjolander, Westheimer, and Kuykendal

    2. know where both locations of House of Pies is

    3. understand where you're going if you're on the:
    North Freeway
    Gulf Freeway
    Northwest Freeway
    Eastex Freeway
    Southwest Freeway
    Katy Freeway
    East (aka The Beast) Freeway
    La Porte Freeway
    Pierce Elevated
    South Freeway

    4. you fear Metro buses when driving

    5. You know River Oaks has nothing to do with oaks by a river
     
  9. chickbea

    chickbea Chillin' With My Peeps

    Jan 18, 2007
    Vermont
    I have to add to that one about going to the lake - my sister lived in Texas for a bit and I remember going to a lake with her when I visited. That water had to be 80 degrees or more - it was like bathwater! Yuck!
     
  10. NewGuineaChooks

    NewGuineaChooks Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Aug 24, 2007
    San Antonio, Texas
    Yep! Some things, like the fire ants & quickly changing weather aren't unique to texas, but they sure are a part of the total package.

    Blisschick: mustn't forget to pronounce that 'r' in Kuykendal ! (went to Rice)
     

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