Just have to vent...

[mamaKate]

I absolutely hear you. Unfortunately the pup is easier to fix than the boyfriend. An undisciplined puppy is an irritation but an undisciplined adult GSD is a danger. You have to be practical and completely let go of fair. Are you willing to take the time and make the sacrifices to properly raise the puppy yourself? If not, please rehome him as soon as possible. I had a similar issue with my ex and our kids. I realized early that the fun was his and the responsibility was mine. They were all worth it.
ETA: You might want to get him ( the puppy not the boyfriend) an outdoor kennel for the times when you can't be home.

 

[angie3881]

It sounds like my house...

#1. Husband drags puppy home.
#2. Husband ensures wife it is HIS dog and he will take care of his buddy.
#3. Husband is gone at all husband's obligations all the time.
#4. Wife cannot just leave the dog to crap everywhere and chew everything up.
#5. Wife is resentful of dog she has to care for when her poodle is perfectly trained and has manners.
#6. Wife spends twice as much money on twice as many medications, food and treats for husband's buddy.
#7. Husband falls asleep while wife is working late and wife comes home to pile of crap on floor and soundly sleeping husband in recliner.
#8. Wife resists the urge to fill husband's shoes full of buddy's crap.
#9. Wife realizes husband's buddy is really HER buddy after all because she spent all the time working with and training him.
#10. Time for a new steam vac to keep up with the carpets. Wife pays for it.
#11. Wife accepts the inevitable and has two dogs and also finds some comfort in the fact husband's buddy is successfully trained after 6 months. Husband never will be properly trained.

Best of luck to you. I know what you are going through and how frustrated you are. I really do.

 

[redhen]

Ropo , you HAVE to get your DH on the same training page as you..or that dog is going to end up all screwed up..
Especially a dog like a GSD....

 

[rodriguezpoultry]

Quote:
LMAO! Guess that's what I'm gonna have to do! Haha!! I've already come to the conclusion that potty training is gonna have to be my area. The tethering is REALLY helping though. He's learning several things at once with it...one of the main things "Don't pull the leash! It won't get you what you want!" The next? "Barking isn't going to help either...we can ignore you."

It also gives Mira time away from the puppy pouncing practice that she's taught him...

 

[angie3881]

I can honestly say that sometimes it is not fair and sometimes it really sucks, but at the same time I know I am just more level headed at the dog training responsibilities. My husband thinks if he has a "talk" with the dog before he leaves the house, that is sufficient. (Several years ago, this talking method resulted in me coming home from a conference to my blinds torn from the windows and every ounce of food in the cupboards strewn all over the floor. Including flour.)

.

My husband does his best to not hinder my attempts now. If he does something like not putting the dog in the crate before he leaves, he has made an honest mistake and feels bad when I let him know what his dog chewed up. I think once you resign yourself to taking over the responsibility, it lessens the resentment you have for the dog. (kind of an if you can't beat 'em, join 'em attitude.)

My husband works hard and has many other excellent qualities... dog training is just not one of them.

He brought home a Mountain Fiest- which is a coon dog and resembles a large Jack Russell on meth and steroids. Very stubborn and difficult to manage. So, he knows he owes me a great deal.

I actually even got a wooden rug replacement for Christmas that his "buddy" chewed up. it does get better. Get the bf on board!!

Good luck!!!!!!

 

[Rusty Hills Farm]

Quote:
Actually, I don't agree. There can be only ONE trainer, one person who is in charge and who assumes total responsibility for the puppy. The rest of the family can help out as long as they understand the trainer's rules about everything. But when more than one person is supposedly in charge, that's how you get the "But I just looked at the tv for a second!" stuff happening. To this day, my husband can take his own dog outside and have to come ask me to bring him in!!! I walk out the door, say the word "house" (SAY it-- not shout it), and the dog is inside before I can step back in and shut the door. GSDs know who is in charge. They also know instantly when you are not really in charge and can be overruled by someone else. When that's the case, eventually the dog doesn't listen to you either. So be in charge. Completely and without resentment. Or don't get the dog in the first place.


As always, JMO

Rusty

 

[dainerra]

I've never heard of anyone having that problem before. esp since military/police/patrol dogs routinely work with many handlers

 

[Rusty Hills Farm]

We're talking a puppy here that is a family pet. Not a working dog. Working dogs do indeed work for many handlers, tho they do always seem to work best for one in particular. And with family dogs, it's been my experience that only one spouse actually follows through with training them, just like they're the one that follows through with dealing with the kids, cleaning up household messes, and sorting out the unpleasant household problems. There always seems to only be ONE responsible spouse when there's nasty stuff to be handled.

As always, JMO

Rusty

 

[Brindlebtch]

Ropo, when the pup is out he needs to be under direct supervision, and I mean eyes actually on the pup, or tethered. Since he is having problems he should go out every 10-15 min . Not every 30 min. Set the kitchen timer each time so everybody knows when the pup must go out. He needs to go out after and while he is playing, chewing, immediately after a nap or out of the crate or running around or just hanging out. He needs to be going out all the time and being asked if he needs to go. When he does he gets lavish praise! If he doesn't need to go then OK and take him back inside to play or whatever. But in 10-15 min he needs to be back outside and someone needs to be asking him if he needs to go. If he isn't under direct observation or tethered and nobody can take him out every few min then he needs to be crated. If he is in a room with you, shut all the doors so he can't slip off to potty. Set the kitchen timer so your hubby will know it is time to take him out. I can't tell you how many times I have been outside in the rain with an umbrella, dressed in my nightshirt and slippers, asking a pup if they need to potty.

Also, if there is any residual odor at all left from his previous accidents, the scent will scream "you can go here". Make sure to use an enzyme cleaner so there is no enticing odor.

After having performance dogs my entired married life, I have found that no matter what my husband says or what his intentions are, ALL the dogs ended up being mine and obeying me.

 

[Brindlebtch]

Quote:
This has pretty much been my experience, also. I have had many couples come out and both try to work the dog. It never works very well and inevitably the dog will work better for one spouse and the other ends up watching or dropping out. I always encouraged the spouse "in charge" of the dog to back up the less dominant half of the couple, however.