just might be losing my mind....

Discussion in 'Family Life - Stories, Pictures & Updates' started by chickensducks&agoose, Jan 5, 2010.

  1. DH is getting deployed, and is leaving Thursday morning. He's got to be at the armory by 0730. I made dinner, and then realized that he had stirred the pasta with the tater-tot spatula, and there were all sorts of tater tot bits in the pasta. My kids are really picky, and tend to throw tantrums if their food touches, or if there's weird stuff in it... I managed to disguise it by shoveling shaky cheese on the kids pasta, but still.... and then he was saying how grumpy I was all of a sudden, and why was I so upset. I am furious at him for everything.. painting the windowsill without taking my new curtains down (paint smears all over the backs of them), yelling at me for leaving something in the car, never picking up his laundry, giving the kids cupcakes before dinner, and HELLO? Leaving!!!! so I am upstairs sort of crying, trying not to just go to bed, on the second to last night he has left at home. I should be making the most of it, but all I want to do is cry and feel sorry for myself. probably some PMS going on too... if I'm going to be completely honest.... stupid, stupid world sometimes. and now my nose is runny. gross.

  2. annie3001

    annie3001 My Girls

    Jun 11, 2009
    [​IMG] were all here for ya at byc!
    thank him for us for serving our country! [​IMG]
  3. Cindiloohoo

    Cindiloohoo Quiet as a Church Mouse

    Dec 19, 2009
    Southwest TN
    I'll be praying for you guys. In the mean time, TELL him why you are upset so he doesn't leave thinking there is an issue. You'll worry him to death, and THERE is no place for added worry. Please talk it out and tell him you just don't know how to deal with him leaving! God Bless!
  4. Catstar68

    Catstar68 Songster

    Sep 7, 2009
    Franklinton, NC
    [​IMG] here, you need one of these.
    I've never seen a kid starve to death when the plate in front of them had the tater tots and pasta touching. As far as the tantrums...well. They can tantrum away in their rooms with no supper.
    Honestly Honey, you need to be good to yourself. Every member of your family is under alot of stress and from your post, it shows. Do you have a minister or someone that you can talk to? You will need a support network to help you through this.
    But meanwhile, [​IMG] take care of yourself. I will say prayers for your family.
  5. OhMyItsAndyy

    OhMyItsAndyy Songster

    Dec 22, 2009
    West England

    You poor darling [​IMG]
    I would just tell him about how you feel with him going. I'm sure he'll understand. He's gunna be missing you too

    And i agree about the kids in their rooms. Don't want their dinner? Dont have any. Simple.


    We're all here for you, and you can PM anytime [​IMG] [​IMG]
  6. Camelot Farms

    Camelot Farms Chickenista

  7. Robin'sBrood

    Robin'sBrood Flock Mistress

    May 8, 2008
    North Carolina
    [​IMG] [​IMG]

  8. cat

    cat Songster

    Jul 9, 2008
    This is probably not what you want to hear, but here is 21 years of army wife experience for you - woman up!

    Your husband is annoying you by trying to make sure everything is done in the house before he leaves, because he hates leaving you, feels guilty and wants to try and cover all the bases so he can go knowing you all are going to be safe and taken care of the best he can. I know its annoying, I know its frustrating and you feel abandoned, I know you can't scream at a faceless military so its easy to take it out on your spouse and get bitter, but the time for the pity party is after he has gone.

    People will tell you to be honest and share your feelings, frankly in my opinion that's stupid and selfish. Of course he knows you feel like c""p, so does he, but in order for him to leave and be able to have peace of mind to do his job out there, he needs you to reassure him everything is fine and you will all be ok while he is gone. He loves you, imagine how much harder it is for him to leave when he knows how upset you are and is worrying about whether you can cope.

    Tell him you are just sad about him going and its made you cranky, then make the most of the time you have together and be nice to each other - it sure beats feeling like a complete monster the day after he is gone and you are wishing you had the night to do over!

    There is a ton of help and support here and in your 'real' world, and we are always here to support you, make you laugh and cry alongside you. Plenty of us have been there and done it and are still doing it, we really do understand. Chin up girl, he is going whether you like it or not, so don't let tomorrow's tears steal today's precious hours.

    feeling your pain [​IMG]
  9. Godsgrl

    Godsgrl Ostrich wrangler

    Aug 27, 2007
    at the zoo usually
    I'm sorry. [​IMG] When my dh deployed last August, it was a really hard time for me as well. Sundays are really special for us, and our last Sunday together all I could do was cry. It's normal to be angry with him, it's part of you realizing he is leaving, and separating from him emotionally. Talk to him, hug him, and let him know you love him. Listen to your dh, and try to understand how he feels. I'm so sorry for you. My pm is always open if you want to talk.

BackYard Chickens is proudly sponsored by