Just Need a Rant (Trigger Warning)

[Mrs J]

My intent was not to sound harsh, or even judgemental. Sometimes narcissistic tendencies are born out of trauma. Imagine your parents or the people you trust never being there for you. You become very independent and never develop relationship skills or empathy because it was never shown to you. It's very sad but people are often a product of their environment. But hopefully we can as you did choose a different way. I don't have children but I think I am very maternal, it shows up in my occupation and of course my insane love for all these chickens

I Absolutely agree, and hopefully @Willowhisp will see that, I love animals also, probably more than ppl (well except my kids obvs) I didn’t think you were being judgmental, you were just telling the truth, sometimes the truth hurts, seems harsh, I know that personally, but the truth is better than a lie.

 

[629522]

I Absolutely agree, and hopefully @Willowhisp will see that, I love animals also, probably more than ppl (well except my kids obvs) I didn’t think you were being judgmental, you were just telling the truth, sometimes the truth hurts, seems harsh, I know that personally, but the truth is better than a lie.

Sometimes I do as well but I have learned that hurting people hurt people and so much pain in families is due to trauma that happened and never had the opportunity to heal. My own father and I have a challenging relationship but he was left as day old infant by his parents. His first lesson was rejection by his mother, the person who should have loved him most (and I'm not questioning her love, it was 1937 and I don't know the circumstances but children believe they are responsible). It affected his ability to love me and the way I felt about myself. Sometimes trauma is generational.
Thank you for coming to my TedTalk

 

[Mrs J]

Sometimes I do as well but I have learned that hurting people hurt people and so much pain in families is due to trauma that happened and never had the opportunity to heal. My own father and I have a challenging relationship but he was left as day old infant by his parents. His first lesson was rejection by his mother, the person who should have loved him most (and I'm not questioning her love, it was 1937 and I don't know the circumstances but children believe they are responsible). It affected his ability to love me and the way I felt about myself. Sometimes trauma is generational.
Thank you for coming to my TedTalk

That is so true! My mother was pregnant at 16yrs old, it brought shame on the family, my grandad went mad and demanded she had an abortion, but he eventually accepted it, my mother didn’t, her bitterness towards me caused a massive divide in our family, then she blamed me, I didn’t ask to be born, funny enough, my grandad took me on, and loved me as his own He was a hard worker, and that has passed on to me. When I lost my children’s dad to a car crash, I broke! Life was crap, but where there is a will…also, I realised I was not the only person going through pain, no ones life is perfect.

 

[Mrs J]

Oh ay @Willowhisp, you have got us all talking

 

[sourland]

Oh ay @Willowhisp, you have got us all talking

and thinking and feeling - we all have our own particular pain, but we have survived. I have learned to be proud of myself.

 

[629522]

and thinking and feeling - we all have our own particular pain, but we have survived. I have learned to be proud of myself.

I think your pride is justified because you earned it. Everything you have endured brought you to this point and you could have let it make you bitter but I have not seen that.

 

[629522]

That is so true! My mother was pregnant at 16yrs old, it brought shame on the family, my grandad went mad and demanded she had an abortion, but he eventually accepted it, my mother didn’t, her bitterness towards me caused a massive divide in our family, then she blamed me, I didn’t ask to be born, funny enough, my grandad took me on, and loved me as his own He was a hard worker, and that has passed on to me. When I lost my children’s dad to a car crash, I broke! Life was crap, but where there is a will…also, I realised I was not the only person going through pain, no ones life is perfect.

I'm sorry you went through that and for your loss. Grief is life changing, no matter what form it comes in. But it can also leave you with a perspective that you only get by going through it.

 

[Mrs J]

I think your pride is justified because you earned it. Everything you have endured brought you to this point and you could have let it make you bitter but I have not seen that.

I think the morale of the story is

I'm sorry you went through that and for your loss. Grief is life changing, no matter what form it comes in. But it can also leave you with a perspective that you only get by going through it.

Everyone feels pain at some point, grief is awful, but it makes you appreciate life and people, it’s taught me a valuable lesson..in the blink of an eye you can be gone..grab it, appreciate it, and be happy, you are who you are

 

[Lacy Duckwing]

@Willowhisp, I want you to know that we love and care about you, and are praying for you. Lots of love and hugs your way!

 

[Mrs J]

@Willowhisp, I want you to know that we love and care about you, and are praying for you. Lots of love and hugs your way!

And that is BYC A family!