Just Would Like Some Prayers, UPDATE

[McGoo]

This is a heartbreaker. I will say my prayers for you and her. My heart breaks for you - I was a single mom for many years.

My dh would kill me if he knew I told you this story, but back before we were married, my dh was raising his son and his son decided to go and live with his ex. (She had bought him all kinds of things and promised him no discipline at all)
So he went to live with her. That was the only time I ever saw my dh truly cry. Good new, as it turned out, his son came back within 2 mos. Somehow his son realized that the discipline was for his own good and really equated to love.

all the best

 

[ChickaD]

Just want you to know you and yours will surely be in my prayers...try not to look (or worry) too far ahead, 'cause when we do that, we get ahead of the grace God has for us in this present moment. He will provide for you, moment by moment.

 

[Mrs MIA]

It's hard... you're a good mom...

 

[WriterofWords]

That is hard, I know, I've been there. Steven is 16, and about 2 years ago he decided after being pushed by his father that he wanted to try living with him and doing the male bonding thing. I said ok, if that's what you want but if you do it during the school year I won't pull you in and out of school if you change your mind, you are there for the year. He tried it during the summer and didn't even make a week. I pray it turns out the best for everyone involved, especially your daughter.
Be strong, have an honest talk with her about her dad hasn't been in her life much, don't point fingers or say bad things that will make her want to take his side against you, just be honest.
Good luck to you.

 

[MagsC]

Thank you all SO much.(eyes tearing)
Before this past May, her father hadnt talked to her in three years and hadnt SEEN her in four years. Before THAT he would come in with promises he always broke, maybe once a year, possibly call twice a year, and I was the one there to shore her emotions up,comfort her, be her "shoulder".
In May he showed up with wife number 4, unannounced. I was probably more harsh than I needed to be but I couldnt believe the NERVE. He actually expected me to let them stay here. And when I said no, he went to my PARENTS. I couldnt believe it.
Enough of that though.

I have been very good about not putting him down in front of my daughter. Though this is like being stabbed through the heart, my daughter is an intelligent girl and I have to have faith that this will all work out for the best. If I dont, I am lost.

 

[Mrs MIA]

About all you can do is sit her down and talk to her, hug on her, and let her know (if it's true) that she always has a place with you if it doesn't work out. She's going to have to start making her own decisions/mistakes sometime... no matter how hard it is on your heart.

I do believe it is a little rude of him to think he can just waltz back into the picture like that... how does #4 feel about it all? What's his motive, if he hasn't cared enough to see her before this?

I don't get it. But that's neither here nor there... what's important is the bond between you and your daughter. Let her know you're there for her, no matter what.

 

[English Chick]

Parenthood can be so difficult, stay strong, she may well believe that the grass is greener with dad, but am sure she will come running home after a week or two. Will predict that wife No 4 will not appreciate any attention being taken away from herself especially by a teenager..... keep smiling, but also tell your daughter it is fine to come back home when she is ready. Will keep you in my prayers.......xx

 

[MagsC]

Thanks all for the great advice and prayers. Nothing was said about it this morning, so we will just see how everything goes.Sigh.

 

[English Chick]

Chin up MagsC chin up, all is not lost.....keep patience (I know it can be difficult) Your love will win in the end. xx

 

[SpottedCrow]

Hugs and prayers Mags...

I wouldn't bring it up if she doesn't...
The grass may be greener deal, most times does NOT work out...
The teenaged years are really hard on the parents AND on the kids, but we all get through them.