Lashing out, mostly out of disgruntledness

[OlliOlliOlli]

I am beyond my teenage years but not in my 30's yet...I am noticing that I am getting increasingly disgruntled with my life. I'm getting urges to lash out and be emotionally cruel to people...

I swear, since I got on Facebook I've gotten like this -- I'm tired of seeing the expensive vacations, the stupid day-by-day self-portraits of "baby bumps" in expensive marble bathrooms, the 3 carat engagement rings with the handcrafted proposals from Mr. Perfect, the masters and PhD graduation pictures, the "oh poor me making so much money working from home, la la la" and the "zomg I loooove my husband, God loves me so much more than you because I'm so blessed" stuff...in reality I used to be satisfied with my life even though I am unmarried and childless and working a job I don't particularly like but it pays the bills...but it's like now I am getting so disgruntled and viciously angry at everyone...

I told an inconsiderate cashier tonight that "it must suck to not be able to do your pathetic minimum wage job." This shocked my normally tolerant boyfriend and he's like "What is up with you? You're getting downright vicious and over the top." And he is right...I am withdrawing and getting furious with even random strangers.

Do any of you have your own personal ways with dealing with these greenies and self-destructive tendencies inside? I don't know exactly what is setting me off but it is consuming me and creating this frustrated person shaking on their foundation. I should be working on creating a NEW life for myself, yet I am increasingly dissatisfied, sitting around on social networks feeling like my ulcer is being ripped open a little more by the little status updates and photogs of others. I feel downright pathetic.

 

[DTchickens]

Usually when i get like this, i got out in my backyard.. in the late evenings so it's not so hot, pull me out a chair, watch the sunset/my chickens.. And then think about what is making me like that. Usually once you figure it out it is easy to stop. Or at least help.. It also helps if you think about the other people you're near and what they could be going through. Maybe think about the people who DO NOT HAVE WHAT YOU HAVE... And also when you get a second before you open you're mouth ask "What would Jesus do?" (Had to throw that in there). But yeah just think about what they could be going through and how those words would affect them, think if you really want to be played off as someone you'll make yourself out to being by saying that, think "do i even gain anything from saying this?". The main thing you probably need is a nice night.

Spend some "Sweet time" with you're boyfriend, maybe even open up and talk.. Works for my girlfriend and i.. Or you can go out and have a night of fun, or just do the things you enjoy.. No thoughts of stressful issues or anything. Hope you get it all worked out.

 

[danielle82]

Sometimes we have preconceived notions about what life "should" be like i.e. children, husband, college education, nice career, car, big house, several gorgeous chicken coops (j/k on that last one, maybe thats just me) it varies from person to person. I think everyone probably has gone through that, or will go through that at some point. I don't think you have too big a problem, since you are able to recognize it. Some people have very bad attitudes and can't see it/ don't care, I dunno. I think you probably have a really good heart and thats why being unhappy and taking it out on people is bugging you. If people are snooty like that on facebook, just drop it for a while. No one needs to have braggarts rubbing things in their faces,

 

[DTchickens]

One thing you should think about too, is when people rub things in you're face. Or post things on myspace, facebook etc. About how perfect their husband, house, kids, life.. Etc is. No one is perfect so that rules out the perfect husband/wife thing, they can be perfect TO YOU.. But to someone else they can be a train wreck.

With nice houses, kids, fancy vacations, etc.. Comes big bills.. Look at all the stars and think "Why have most been in rehab?" "Why do they not have succesful marriages?" and they have a lot more problems too, and it isn't just famous people.. Money truely can't buy happiness.. Maybe for a short time but then it usually comes back to bite em.

 

[Jena]

Don't log onto facebook.

Really, dont do it to yourself.

I am at the other end of the spectrum from you, but I really understand where you are coming from, and I am attempting to help not criticise you. Ok.

I will say this, not knowing you and just basing what I say on the fact that you have posted this on the BYC site. lol...

Facebook is a social network and in the current environment the site should be in a state of flux. Over the past 10 years society has been hooked on the self congratulatory boastful path that is fed by these networks.

Following the Economic and Societal Crash last year, people should be starting to think in a different way, it does cover both the economy and society as we have to think about the way things were going and the massive changes that have resulted.

Be really more content with yourself, because you are actually in the front of a new and growing movement in society and economy.

You have obviously thought about the future, and by becoming involved with chickens and making a connection with nature and sustainability and a different way of living you are actually, in the very forefront of the only positive way to move forward.

Not as some raging eco-warrior or anything dramatic but by being happy and quietly moving forward in a way that will make you a much superior person to any of the idiots on Facebook.
If the electric runs out tomorrow, where will all their material and social wealth get them, at least you will eat and have a greater understanding of how to survive.

You are not losing, you are the long term winner.

Your negative thoughts are because you feel you are in the wrong place and you are in reality in exactly the right place, you are different and you should be very proud of yourself.

There are no pockets in shrouds is an old saying here, it is better to be a good person than to be collecting material wealth. Look at your chickens they have been around for a very long time, and they are still going still doing what they have always done.

The answer keep it simple, and Smile

leave Facebook to the numbsculls who have nothing better to do with their time.

 

[saddina]

Re: facebook

People lie.

 

[NRacine]

Don't go to facebook anymore. It's a huge pile of people showing off and keeping up with the Joneses. @#%^ that.

I get the same way and my husband is worse. Thus, we stay home a lot. Can't stand people. We are basically best friends and have a small handful of very good friends. We like our house and pets and garden, and that's all we need. You don't have to have 400 friends on facebook or even 20 "live" friends.

Just do what you do. Everyone else can blankity blank.

 

[TammyTX]

We all set out with some Pollyanna "plan" of how our life will be.

People see you with your chickens/animals and wish they had your life. It's the 'ol "grass is always greener..."

Don't feel like you have to live up to anyone else's standards.

There is always something that we feel will make our lives better, be it a big diamond ring or a nice raised bed garden.

Set your goals but be flexible because a lot of life can get in the way.

You will find rude and inconsiderate people everywhere. If the cashier haphazardly throws my groceries in a bag that I am paying my hard earned money for, then yeah, I say something (maybe something different from what you said...

). If you feel tread upon, then stand up for yourself, but pick your battles because usually they are not worth your time and trouble.

 

[Buff Hooligans]

Every once in a while I am prone to exactly what OlliOlli described. I shock myself with the thoughts that run through my head. And I'm normally a very nice person.

One of the hardest things in life sometimes is to "want what you have", not to have what you want.

Peace be with you Olli, I know exactly how you feel. Just try to ride it out. Those feelings will go away by themselves eventually.

 

[wingnut1]

OlliOlli --