Lashing out, mostly out of disgruntledness

[Rosalind]

Quote:
Nowadays if you take a vacation too long, your boss might conclude that the business can get by without your assistance. I've seen colleagues return from extra-long leaves, vacations and part-timing to find a pink slip. No one takes vacation anymore if they can help it--my boss specifically told me not to take more than a half-day vacation for the next three months.

the stupid day-by-day self-portraits of "baby bumps"

I can't be the only person on earth who thinks "ewww, please don't make me look at your stretch marks" when I see that sort of thing. There are 216,000 miracles born every day, are these sorts of things meant to remind me to purchase a shower gift?

in expensive marble bathrooms, the 3 carat engagement rings

It might not be their personal bathroom. Just so you know, those 3 carat diamonds are mined by young children whose arms and legs are cut off as punishment for not performing to the mine owners' standards. DeBeers is something of an international mafia.

with the handcrafted proposals from Mr. Perfect,

Yeah, they're all Mr. Perfect right up until they go "hiking the Appalachian trail."

the masters and PhD graduation pictures

Think of the crummiest professor you had in college, the biggest blowhard. He had a PhD, too.

the "oh poor me making so much money working from home, la la la"

A lot--I would even say most--of those "work from home and make big bucks!" things are scams. Others,like Amway and Quixtar , are pyramid schemes in which much money is promised but never delivered--and the bulk of the money the business makes is by selling motivational tapes to fellow salespeople.

and the "zomg I loooove my husband, God loves me so much more than you because I'm so blessed" stuff

Sorry, but IMHO that sort of Neo-Calvinist Bertha Bettern'yew attitude is exactly what gives Christianity a bad name. The book of Matthew is pretty clear that rich folks don't make it into heaven and that the best thing rich people can do with their money is give it to help the poor. Jesus was very insistent on the point that the best thing people with lots of love can do, is love their fellow person, especially the most despised and unlucky person, and the best thing people with lots of blessings can do is spread them around for all to share. Just my opinion. Well, and that of the KJV New Testament. People should read it sometime...

Do any of you have your own personal ways with dealing with these greenies and self-destructive tendencies inside?

An old joke:

Three high-class ladies are sitting around having tea. First lady says, "My husband's so rich, he bought me a new BMW with leather interior." Hostess says, "Isn't that nice!" Second lady says, "Well, my husband's so rich, he bought me a full-length mink coat to wear to the opera--we got season tickets!" Hostess says, "Isn't that nice!" The first lady looks at the hostess and sneers, "Isn't your husband rich? I guess he doesn't buy you anything!" Hostess says calmly, "My husband is so rich he sent me to finishing school, where I learned to say 'isn't that nice' instead of 'eff you!'"​

 

[Xtina]

While Facebook made you start thinking about your life from a negative perspective, I don't think you necessarily need to quit facebook to get your old joie de vivre back. It's just a matter of viewing things from another perspective. I struggle with this occasionally too, because my employers are so greedy. I do all the work that earns money at my company and they profit from it, meanwhile I can barely afford my life (which I consider to be pretty modest). So I do a couple of things when I get this way, but I'm not going to claim that it always helps. Here's my list:

1. Think about Darfur. Or, think about the plight of women in Afghanistan. The women living in these places don't get the luxury of choosing their jobs, choosing their husbands, even getting to have a boyfriend, or ever seeing a cashier in a grocery store. To them, your life would be ten times greater than their wildest dreams. So don't let yourself get forlorn about what your friends got that you didn't. Instead, think about what you got that other women in life didn't get.

2. Get some exercise. It helps make you feel better.

3. Listen to someone motivational speak. And it doesn't have to be a fruitcake either. I find when I start feeling sorry for myself in life, Henry Rollins kicks me back into a different frame of mind. It doesn't have to be Henry Rollins for you. Maybe it could be someone wiser (like any book of the Bible), but whatever you choose, it should be something that reminds you of a different perspective.

4. Get out in your garden. Don't do things that cost money, but find the little free things that give you entertainment. Get off the internet and turn off the TV. If you have dogs, walk them. Spending money will only make you feel worse about what others can afford, so don't fall into the "treat yourself" trap. Get enjoyment out of the free stuff.

5. Volunteer to help someone less fortunate. This is something I haven't done in years, but it occurred to me as something that might help you alter your perspective on life. I should probably take my own advice.

6. Remind yourself of why you didn't make the same decisions your old friends did. If you knew them since high school or college, then you probably had the chance to make the same choices they did. But you didn't, and you probably had a well-thought reason for this. So get back the individuality that made you select what you did, and appreciate the choices you made in life as being the right ones for you. And if you still have regrets about your decisions not yielding the same results as those of your friends, well, kick yourself into gear and get on a path to change those decisions. Maybe the achievements of your friends are things that you want and need and you can start making steps to achieve those things. But sitting around bemoaning your fate will never help you achieve them.

Finally, I get the inkling that maybe part of what's wrong is dissatisfaction with your boyfriend. I may be totally off-base with this, but is there part of you that wants him to propose to you? If so, you probably need to talk with him about it and be open and honest. He needs to be the one to bear the brunt of whatever's bothering you, if it's something he's done to upset you. This way, those emotions won't empty themselves on the nearest poor victim

Good luck, and I hope any of this helps.

 

[hearthnsoul]

You know, I think alot of people are feeling that way lately. We, as a country have become so off balance and priorities are so exscue. I can tell you this, what's going on at my house is 100% therapy,..barnyard therapy
I have one of the jobs that I once had huge distaste for,..I am as my mother always calls me essentially a tree hugger. A few years ago I decided I had not such a nice opinion of real estate agents,..one too many bad dealing with them. So I decided I would slip into their shoes and see if I could still be me. I know it's quirky but it is how I am hardwired,..it bothers me to not like something to such an extent and I have to see for myself what that's all about.
Let me say the job is stressful, the people are irrational, but I have found that I love my clients,..I enjoy helping them find their homes,..so I answered my question, yes you can be a real estate agent and still be a true to who you are,..accept one thing,..I became so type A I was working all the time,..and I frankly missed being me outside of the job. I got stressed out I started having less and less tolerance for people, in the end it was because I was unhappy and out of touch with myself, now that's something I just could not live with,,.I kinda got a view of how the ones who helped me into a narrow view of the profession perhaps got the way they did. So I had to say to myself,..ok can i remedy this in a positive way???
So in came the chickens,..and then the ducks and now the goats. Everyone at work is laughing, of course they expect this sort of thing from me, I am kinda wired the moon.
But I have to say priority wise,..I love being home with the animals,..caring for them, watching my children caring for them and knowing we are coming back to what we are meant to be, people who live in a more balanced way with the world we have been entrusted to. In answer to your question, I find that the animals have made me less stressd out and in the end people irritate me less because when i am around them I am gushing about how therapudic my animals are and how enjoyable, and in a way it steps us all outside of the situations that would normally have us grinding at one another. You have to get happy with yourself and your own situation and priorities, live how you feel good stop comparing yourself and your values with others. Essentially we are all incomparable. We all have our own struggles, triumphs and priorties and in the end I can honestly tell you we are just humans being humans and no matter what ones situation and priorities are
we are learning every day, making mistakes and feeling. When you understand that, you may get frustrated for a moment here and there,..I sure do, but I am able to quickly get back into my happy zone and you will find you don't really feel the need to lash out so much.
I have a thing I am working on with myself. It's my competence clause. My pet peeve,..I get myself in a nit if someone is doing a job or in a profession and they aren't giving themselves a 110%. I am working on that everyday, because It is not my business how someone chooses to undertake their work, instead of complaining I am trying to get to the point of just saying, well this works for you, but it isn't serving me so I am going to interact with someone else in your profession who does the job to my satisfaction

 

[hearthnsoul]

An old joke:

Three high-class ladies are sitting around having tea. First lady says, "My husband's so rich, he bought me a new BMW with leather interior." Hostess says, "Isn't that nice!" Second lady says, "Well, my husband's so rich, he bought me a full-length mink coat to wear to the opera--we got season tickets!" Hostess says, "Isn't that nice!" The first lady looks at the hostess and sneers, "Isn't your husband rich? I guess he doesn't buy you anything!" Hostess says calmly, "My husband is so rich he sent me to finishing school, where I learned to say 'isn't that nice' instead of 'eff you!'"

Oh I love it, that's me and my oldest daughter,..when you hear one of us say isn't that nice....refer to the joke.​