A good basic rule of thumb is to either ask, or if that's not possible to use they/them like you would if a package was delivered at your door and you don't know the gender of the person that delivered it (as in, "and they put the package in my grill!"). Always also be willing to change a pronoun if someone corrects you.
There was a trans woman at work who was fairly early in transition so still looked quite male, but you could tell by the way she dressed (included padded bra) that she was female or wanted to be seen as such. An older lady at work referred to her in the masculine and she simply corrected her in a polite way, and went on with life. The older lady apologized and I never heard her misgender her again. That was a good interaction.
You know, now that I think about it... religion is actually a banned subject on BYC and yet there are many threads centered on it including ones with mods participating. There is no rule about speaking about being gay or not as long as it doesn't get out of PG rating....@Kusanar @aart Bingo! I don't think my chickens care about religion either but plenty of threads for that. Or about who is an artist or not, but plenty of threads for that.
If people dividing into groups is only a problem when it's being gay and not when it's another arbitrary category maybe that's something worth examining.
You young’ns have a good day now.
