Men are like

[JenniferJoIN]

Royicus, I admire the electrical engineers... I just can't do wires!

And thank you Meanqueen for the jokes, made me laugh!

 

[banditgin]

These have been funny. BTW, my DH is a much better cook than I am. I can do mac & cheese and spaghetti.

 

[eggzettera]

Understanding Engineers - Take One

To the optimist, the glass is half full.
To the pessimist, the glass is half empty.
To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as It needs to be.
==============================================

Understanding Engineers - Take Two
A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly
slow group of golfers.

The engineer fumed, "What's with these guys? We must have been waiting for
15 minutes!"

The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such ineptitude!
There is the Ranger; Let's have a word with him. Hi George! Say,
what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?"

The greens keeper replied, "Oh, yes, that's a group of blind firefighters.
They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always
let them play for free anytime."

The group was silent for a moment. The pastor said, "That's so sad. I think
I will say a special prayer for them tonight.

"The doctor said, "Good idea. And I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist
buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them."

The engineer said, "Why can't these guys play at night?"

OK back to topic, but in the same vein....

ANALYSIS OF A WOMAN (purely in a lighter vein)

Nomenclature: Woman
Symbol: Wo
Occurrence: Ubiquitous and abundant
Origin: Unknown
Size: Standard -- 42-24-36
Availability: In all sizes except the standard. Some are upside down to the standard.
Mass: 35-55 kgs.
Length: Between 1 and 2 metres

Properties:
++Structural: Mostly petit frame with 75 % surface tension.
++Physical: At times highly dynamic, but no initiative in times of crises; possesses little strength and force; exhibits alpha, fronted by a better looking specimen.
++Chemical: boils at nothing and melts under sentimental conditions; freezes at sensitive moments, bitter by nature; violently reacts after a brief solitude and improper treatment leading to explosions; turns red even on a little provocation and becomes pale during crises.
++Conductivity: An equally good conductor of both love and hate.
++Thermal: Cold sentimentality under hot conditions and exaggerated sentimentality under cold conditions.

=Susceptibility: Systems:
Eyes- Susceptible near all saree emporia
Ears- Susceptible to al fashionable earrings, earlocks, eardrops, etc.
Tongue- Susceptible to all gossip.
Nose- Susceptible to exotic smells.
Mouth- Susceptible to all pickles in general
Mind- Highly susceptible under sentimental conditions. Very high infatuation towards gold, silver, etc., and invitations.

=Utility:
- General- An ornamental piece fit for an ivory tower; acts as a tonic when judiciously used, otherwise a non-reversible poison even at sub-lethal doses. An accelerator of spirit and simian enthusiasm even among ascetics.
- Economic- Rise in value under speculative conditions, increases demand, and fall in value decreases demand, a paradox in economic parlance. An instrument for equitable distribution of wealth; acts as an effective income reducing agent. An article of ostentation and possesses snob-appeal. A popular bait in all shops and supermarkets to net the victims.
- Caution- Beware of feminine wits and potentialities. Stop, look twice, listen and recede. 660 V. Inexperienced hands should neither touch nor feel. Never try to find the origin. A cul-de-sac. A land of no return.