That is a neat announcement, Daron. After a miscarriage of my own many years ago, I was reminded of the impossibility of anything so complex forming from a single cell, too small to see with the naked eye, and how the odds of every subsequent cell division occurring successfully are against us. And yet so often it works and it's kind of crazy that way but keeping the odds of failure in mind helped to cope with the loss. Life is pretty cool. Good luck to them.
So it sounds like everyone had a great holiday. That’s good to hear. Mine kind of sucked but only in a relative way (pun intended). I’m one of those people who is thankful every day and doesn’t see a need to specify a holiday to do it, especially since the whole thankful aspect is fiercely personal anyway. But I attend the families' parties out of respect and love for them anyway. Otherwise, I see it as the poultry industry’s special day. Without it, somehow, the entire country would collapse economically or some such nonsense and maybe, just maybe, turkeys would be allowed to breed naturally again instead of dragging their abnormally large breasts in their poo and injected with flavorings only to be served with a side of half-baked thanks for the things others don’t have, like factory farmed turkey. Whoopie! Sorry, I get really cynical this time of year but not completely without reason.
Yeah, so DH’s 92 year old grandfather erupted at the dinner table after some hapless relative uttered a political trigger word that I will not repeat. Luckily I had already left the room but it was most unpleasant, even from afar. I wish, with the benefit of hindsight, that I had gone in there and asked him calmly and politely why he hates so much, why he judges so much and then with the same air of calm asked the rest of them why they were fueling his fire. But I didn’t and part of me regrets it. Instead I stayed in the next room, knitting and cringing at the terrible things that were said. It would be one thing if he were senile but he's sharp as a blade still. I’m reminded of a quote I heard the other day and I will never find it so I will paraphrase, something about nature’s greatest gift being death for renewal, regrowth and change. While I don’t wish death on this man who can be a loving person (or anyone) it is refreshing to know that his brand of hate is dying out with the older generations and being replaced by a greater tolerance that while not perfect is promising and gives me hope. Still, it was not a pleasant dinner and it was hard to be thankful for much in that house, try as I might.
So there was that. And then my own family. There were no arguments or hate speech but I was criticized for being… well, me. They forget and possibly can’t relate to the fact that I am a stay-at-home mom. All of the women in my family have careers. I’m the exception and it makes it really hard, especially when they start dishing out advice that does not suit my situation. I hate to say that they don’t understand because it sounds juvenile but I really don’t think they can understand. Unlike them, I don’t have coworkers and friends or a community that I’m a part of every day or most days or even some days. I struggle every day to be a part of society, to make a difference like they are and not fall into the soap opera and bonbon stigma. Even as an intense introvert, I have to have *some* contact with the outside world, to be a part of *something* just to feel alive. So things like social networking on the internet (including this forum) have become really important to me, giving me a sense of community, amongst other things, but I struggle with it because I can’t always or often be myself.
So long story short, my family gave me the why-can’t-you-just-share-happy-stuff?-treatment which is like saying “why can’t you just be normal like everyone else?” And coming from them, especially my mother, it really hurt. That’s not how she lives and that's not how she taught me to live either. I feel like I was just clubbed and dragged back into the cave. I deactivated my FB account again as a result of the criticism.
Anyway, all that and six hours of driving... I'm exhausted and depressed. I did wave to y'all as I passed your towns, those of you who live off the beaten path between GR and Swanton, OH (I drive M50). Consider yourselves waved at.
