Michigan Thread - all are welcome!

[chickflick]

 

[Opa]

I think we all are guilty of getting so wrapped up in our lives that we lose track of how fast life passes us by. One of the firemen I worked with retired about 10 years before I did. I moved to Sugar Island in the St Mary's River and he was constantly asking me to come up to visit, stay for a few days and get some fishing in. Year and year he would invite me up, and as much as I wanted to go, something would always prevent my going.

Last year I marked my 20th year of retirement which translates as 30 years of meaning to go to Sugar Island. Last year also was the year of my friend's death. 30 years of missed opportunities. Should have somehow found the time and now it's too late.

 

[Farmerboy16]

Fuzzy- I have used the loft for many things over the years. Storing feed, keeping broody hens with their chicks, for breeding, raising chicks, keeping too pumped-up roos there. Now, I am going to fill it up of some of the hay for the livestock to feed in the winter. We are getting about 250 bales, so I think that I can fit about 50 or 60 bales in the loft.

 

[NovaAman]

Oh Mom2, so very sorry. I have some friends that I keep meaning to look up. Fear is what stops me. Why? I have really turned into a hillbilly... Would they accept that? Would they make fun of me now since I am not in my make up and dressed up like I used to be? Would they freak out over the chickens? City girl turned hillbilly. The only thing I am missing is my over-alls.

 

[Mom 2em All]

thank you all I feel so guilty, but also so very sad for a life cut wayy too short. A beautiful girl in a messed up life, no chance for a new beginning. I hurt for the loss of HER- from her daughter, and son, her parents just buried her brother last year...just so sad.

Sam- if only we could turn back time, for just a moment.

Nova-
I let many friends go when I was married the first time. I didnt go to my highschool reunion. Fear kept me away. Fear of being judged. Fear of being embarrassed. I was in a terrible relationship, my marriage was definitely NOT story-book, I gained weight, I lost all confidence that I used to have- and never had much to start with. My teeth are bad from genetics and then-no dental insurance. No money, no way to go out with friends- and I was so pitiful, I had no desire to show the once highschoolers that I was just as plain, just as dumpy, just as pathetic as they had all imagined I would turn out to be. The few friends I did have- I didnt want them to see just what I had become. Or rather, not become.

I let alot of friendships go for lack of confidence in ME and who I was and who I stood for. One thing life has taught me- I am who I am, and thankfully with age, I also can say, "if you dont like it, too bad- keep on going." I am not ashamed of where I am, who i was, or where I am yet to be. I carry alot of insecurity baggage, but when it gets too much- I remind myself that I worked too hard to get where I am to go back to the sad insecure human i once was- and promised myself that I would never let fear of what others may think of me, stop me from making new friends. I hated being lonely, I hated not having someone to talk to when my babies were babies- or when my 1st husband was out on a binge. Never again would I shy away and let fear stop me and never again would I be ashamed of what I have or do not have. And if I started to waiver, I would "fake it til I felt it".

I just wish I had made time for my friend who probably needed a friend so so much- just like I once did.

That said, it is rather fun to meet/run into a snobbish sort who likes to look down their nose and say, "You have CHICKENS? (as in, 'plague...')...so that I can look them in the eye and say, "Lots of them", with a smile.

Be proud of being such a 'hillbilly'. My husband calls me 'ellie mae'. Says when his friends meet my barefoot self and see the animals I keep- that they have no idea of the education I have had. Says you could never guess. Its probably an insult but I choose to take it as a compliment. I make sure to wave and tell em all, "Y'all come back now, ya hear?"

 

[RBahmer]

Im so sorry to hear of my old friend passing away. She was so sweet and so beautiful and we shared so many memories growing up. I am so sad that life got in the way and that we fell out of touch, and that when I had the chance to reconnect that I didnt grab it and jump in. She had a horrible husband and she would only whisper on the phone, and she had become an alcoholic. He forbid her to go anywhere, so we couldnt grab a cup of coffee somewhere and talk. I had very little patience for when she would talk to me- she whispered, and my kids were loud, my husband loud, my house was always bustling and busy and well, I guess I was too impatient. I made the mistake of thinking there was always time. Time after the kids are grown, or after I dont have to work so much, too busy today to call- housework, homework, work, blahblahblah..theres always a reason to let friends and life slip by. Now, its too late for what I wish I had done. We always think theres plenty of time LATER- but sometimes, there is just not. Her son was my sons age, and her daughter the same age as my youngest daughter. She was 43. When I heard of her in the hospital and so gravely ill, I promised myself that as soon as she could have visitors, I was going to go there. I was going to rekindle this friendship. Now I would make time. And we would catch up. That was last week. And now its too late.

That is so sad Kim. I'm so sorry ** hug** ( no huggie thing on my phone). I tell this to my kids all the time but like all they don't listen. I learned the hard way also and that was in 1986 and to this very day it still bothers me. I think of it often. But I was lucky in a way I don't feel I deserved. I was over her way picking up a bull, it was getting on night and I had no lights on my trailor but something kept telling me to stop at her house. So I did. I was there when she was taken to the hospital and I was at the hospital holding her hand when she died. But it still doesn't make up for the excuses of me being too busy to go spend time with her. This I will live with all my life.

 

[RaZ]

Oh Mom2, so very sorry. I have some friends that I keep meaning to look up. Fear is what stops me. Why? I have really turned into a hillbilly... Would they accept that? Would they make fun of me now since I am not in my make up and dressed up like I used to be? Would they freak out over the chickens? City girl turned hillbilly. The only thing I am missing is my over-alls.

Fear of what, Nova? Fear that people won't accept you for who you are? Fear that you are not what they expect you to be? Fear that your fine make-up and dresses have been replaced with muddy shoes and an un-tucked shirt?

If that is how people judge and value you then I think that you are better off without them. That's just my opinion.

You put on those over-alls and just be you YOU. I'll like you anyway that you present yourself just as long as it is the REAL you and not some phony, pretentious, fake person with conditions of friendship that I can't meet. Heck, I won't even hold it against you that you have kids.

 

[snowflake]

Mom 2, so sorry about your friend.

I think we all are guilty of getting so wrapped up in our lives that we lose track of how fast life passes us by.



this is so true... I too lost a friend at a very young age, had seen her the week before she was in a fatal accident. Was hoping to re-kindal my best friend from child hood... to often we wait ......

 

[chicken grandma]

Wow! Thanks to everyone for the lesson on canning and the lesson on friendship!

I have to rethink how I do both those things after reading your comments.

 

[RaZ]

Wow! Thanks to everyone for the lesson on canning and the lesson on friendship!

I have to rethink how I do both those things after reading your comments.

Lessons on canning? Indeed. There are many ways of putting up our food for long term storage. I'm always open to learning a new or better way of doing things.

Lesson on friendship? I've always assumed that it was an easy thing. I like you, you like me. We are both good with that. It's only been recently that I have learned that it is just not that simple. Sometimes there are terms and conditions that need to be met.

I've lost some good friends in the past year simply because I did not know that our friendship was conditional and I failed to meet those un-said conditions.