My babies don't love me???

[noodleroo]

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When I sit in the yard in the late afternoon, my buff orps (4) come sit in my lap and on my chest under my chin and snuggle in my arms and around my neck. I pet them behind their little ears and they close their eyes slowly like they really like it. They don't come for treats; just 'love'. They will sit there as long as I will, over an hour most of the time. I'm certain that they would be more comfortable, temperature wise as its really hot here, if they were on the ground, but they prefer to be 'on' me. I like to think they love me like I love them.

And for the OP, be sure to get down on their level and not towering over the 'resistors'. I like to sit on the floor or the ground and let them come crawl over me like a jungle gym. Try it in a small space like a bathroom or a closet so you are in close proximity at all times. They learn quickly that nothing bad will happen to them being so close to you.

 

[SportChick]

Thanks for all the great responses. I do get my unconditional love from my dogs and my "I-could-really-care-less-about-you" love from my cat! Mostly I just don't want them to be skittish around me. They seem to be gradually doing better. Letting them crawl all over me w/o trying to hold them seems to be the most effective.

They are funny though!

 

[alanaartist]

I was thinking the same thing...but I finally am having a "love" breakthrough. My chicks are 4.5 weeks now.

Cottage cheese did it.

The chicks had no interest in my hands...didn't want to be near them no matter how patient I was or what treat was in them or what I decorated my hands with. I was upset. I keep them in the living room and talk to them constantly and they see me all the time but I was getting no affection.

Then I tried the cottage cheese suggestion someone gave. I still would try to pick them up or get close to them but wasn't getting much but soon they came running when they heard me open the big ol dog crate that is their brooder. (they got the luxury brooder.) Because they go INSANE for cottage cheese small curd and it overtakes all fears to be near me and get it.

A few days ago I was eating yogurt near their brooder and they went BONKERS looking at me and talking. I realized they thought it was their treat...which I space out so they don't get too much protein and only do occasionally.

So, after days of trying to have my hands in the brooder more often without picking them up every time, just to get used to it, and days of cottage cheese, they began running to me and getting happy to see me.

But I didn't want them to just be happy to get food.

So when they were turned around from me and couldn't see me do it, I picked them up one hand under and one hand on top of the wings but the key was I used to set them down immediately when they squawked. I didn't do that this time. I began scratching each one, one at a time on the the back of the neck and they calmed down. Then after awhile I could take my hand away from their wings and they still wanted to sit in my hand...they began falling asleep in it while I scratched on them and talked lovingly to them. They had the sweetest happy look in their eyes and betgan making purring sounds.

After that, they were immediately more comfortable with me and would step out of the brooder when the door was open to come visit with me and they began exploring me...taking my thick stone bracelet and carrying it around, trying to nab a few diamonds, getting right up in my face. I have chickens with champagne taste.

cottage cheese tamed my chickens as the first step to give them motion to come to me.. After that I had to make em feel love and want it more than cottage cheese. Now they do. They even listen to me turning their heads back and forth like my dog does like they are trying to soak in what I am saying. They want to cuddle and be around me even with no treats now. They don't know what love is til they experience it enough then they seemed to think "oooh, I like this...Good feeling" and come back for more. But I did a lot of TRYING to hold them before this without it working so well. It just built up to them finally seeing me as the momma which is the feeder, and the lover and caregiver.

I don't believe for a minute chickens can't love. I know too many stories that say otherwise. Even with each other. I've been reading some extensive studies lately that wow me and show selflessness and caring and love from chickens.

I had to be patient and not push them before they were ready but they have been melting my heart lately so I will simply die if any are roosters as I haven't a clue what my neighbors will do and I had no idea I'd love these babies this much. I may get sound insulation in their coop like musicians have.

 

[noodleroo]

Cottage cheese.....I've never tried it. Glad to have another taming tool! Isn't it so sweet when they just melt into your hand?

 

[Poulets De Cajun]

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I'm sure you enjoy your massage, but you probably dont 'love' your massuese. 'Love' is an anthropomorphic term that humans assign to chickens to make us feel better.

 

[NeeleysAVLChicks]

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I'm sure you enjoy your massage, but you probably dont 'love' your massuese. 'Love' is an anthropomorphic term that humans assign to chickens to make us feel better.

Ah, never fails on these threads or similar that someone feels the need to make just that kind statement, I usually ignore the comment, but honestly it drives me nuts!

Sure, my rational side totally agrees with you. But my question to you would be...who cares and why is there always the need to jump in and condemn others who feel that their chickens "love" them?

I do "feel" that my chickens "love" me when they climb into my lap, sans treats, and stick their head under my neck for a long cuddle. I also know that I'm making assumptions about how they "feel". These "feelings" don't undermine my ability to care for them properly, make rational, levelheaded decisions regarding their welfare and occasionally even eat a mean rooster. So, exactly what harm is being caused by feeling that your chickens "love" you?

Edited for grammar.

 

[Poulets De Cajun]

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Because having a healthy understanding of the relationships that humans have with chickens (or any animals) will prove to be more advantageous for both the human and the chicken in the long run. If a person feels that a chicken doesn't "love" them, they may be apt to process the bird, sell the bird, neglect the bird, or 'adopt' the bird to a less 'caring' home. "Oh my chicken doesn't love me, he doesn't come to me, I dont want him anymore." (not insinuating, just an example.) Whereas, if the person understands that the chicken is just being a chicken, and not withholding 'love' from the owner, said owner can better plan how to handle/train that animal.


ETA: and for the record, I dont condemn anyone who 'loves' their birds, puts diapers on their birds, sleeps with their birds, or whatever else. I'm just the person who likes to make sure that the facts are in the conversation, regardless of how they are interpreted. Do I 'love' my birds (or did I at this point) sure! loved Love LOVED my Silkies! But did I feel neglected, as if they shunned me and didn't "love" me if they didn't come when called, or jump on my hand as chicks... no.

 

[noodleroo]

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Uhhhhhhhh, OK.... I, too have a healthy understanding of the relationship between humans and animals. I guess I just use the word 'love' to shorten what would be a long, rambling paragraph explaining how I and my animals enjoy our mutual relationship. My understanding of our relationship is as a human. My chickens' understanding is from a chicken's perspective. Somehow, someway we have reached some middle ground of understanding one another and we both feel better about it.

Gee, I wonder if chickens have an anthropomorphic term that they assign to humans?

Sorry, I just couldn't help myself. LOL

 

[BackToMyRoots]

This reminds me of a discussion in "That Hideous Strength" by CS Lewis. I think there was a tame bear involved, and someone questioned whether what the bear felt for them was "real" love or "cupboard" love. One character argued, pretty successfully I thought, for an animal like a bear, who has extremely limited social skills even in the wild, can't think abstractly, and is unable to contemplate the past or the future, loving the food source or warm place to sleep is as complete and engrossing an attachment as anything we could ever feel.

It may be kooky, but maybe that anthropomorphic attachment we get to animals isn't all bad. For one thing, it may help us bridge the enormous gap between our communication/behavior and theirs--we may overthink things or misinterpret their behavior much of the time, but at least we're watching carefully enough to notice when something changes and question it.

It also gives us the opportunity to move away from a purely utilitarian view of animals (good for me=good) and try to improve their living conditions beyond what is required to limit our exposure to diseases and off flavors. I can't taste the difference between free range chicken and caged kind, and I don't really know what my chickens are thinking, but I can assume that when they demonstrate behaviors like feather picking or constant fighting, they are uncomfortable, and that I can fix this. If I'm really thinking antrhpomorphically, I'll choose to call their comfort "happiness" and solve their behavior not by cutting their beaks off, which is easier, but by doing what I can to improve their environment until they're no longer "unhappy."

Anyway, that's my two cents. I use the terms "love," "hate," etc., but I try to remember that most animal species live completely in the present moment and aren't capable of a lot of the thinking, planning, and communication I may attribute to them. Then again, I could just about say the same thing about this one brother-in-law...

 

[noodleroo]

BackToMyRoots; How adorable. I think we posted just about the same time. I tried to condense my thoughts and make it simple but yours is really well put.

I think every animal, including humans of course, has a basic nature. Kinda like why some chicks tame down better than others. The relationship between human and animal is basic nature combined with behavioral conditioning. If human behavior is constant there is very little need for thinking or planning on the animals' part. Interesting subject.