My doctor Really has my number


8 Years
Jan 27, 2011
North Alabama
So I see the doctor today and the visit goes like this...

he walks in and shakes his head ' kristen kristen kristen, what did you do this time?"

me: " I fell off the porch"

him: " how did you do that?"

me: " I tripped"

him "thats it? just tripped? no run over by sheep, no kicked by a cow or bit by a horse? just... tripped?"

me: "yup"

doctor: "wow "

so he starts looking me over and tells me I have a very bad sprain and that he doesn't think it has any serious tissue damage otherwise.

him: " so tough woman did you take anything for it?" (he actually said those exact words without a hint of sarcasm)

me: "I took some ibuprofen the next day when iw as using the pitch fork to turn the soil and it made my ankle worse"

doctor does a double take and his eye get wide " YOU took something? It must really hurt."

so he hecks it over again to make sure there is no break since in his mind i must really be hurting to take anything

doctor: " I want you to stay off your foot..." he stares at me in silence for a long moment " But telling you that is useless isn't it?"

me: "yup"

doctor: "Oh i give up"
A woman after my own heart.

I once walked into my doctor's office, burst into tears and said "I don't feel good". The head nurse had my tush in the hospital within an hour! She later said that she thought I had to be dying to A) be crying and B) 'fess up to not feeling well. She wasn't sure which scared her more.
Oh, I have Crohns so I am in the doctors office every 8 weeks getting IV medicine. At that particular time I was in a bad flare that got exponentially worse in a matter of days. I must have looked like death warmed over (I certainly felt like it!). They tossed my tush in the hospital for a week and pumped me full of happy drugs and bland soup. I dropped about 30 pounds in a month (which was nice), but felt pretty rotten for a while. It's all better now though.
I certainly shocked them at the time though. I generally don't complain about the Crohns stuff. It is what it is. We are treating it the best we can and I figure the rest I just get to deal with. It could be worse and lots of people have worse problems. (Plus, I have stuff to do and don't have the time to worry over my gut!)
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Crohns is an autoimmune disease where your immune system fights your digestive system. It is like having the stomach flu all the time. Yay, right?

It is in the same family as ulcerative colitis and such.

Mine is happily under control. Better living them pharmaceuticals, you know? It is a hassle and a bother, but so far I pretty much do everything that I want to do. Life can always be worse. Everybody has something. This is just my something. Truthfully, I can adjust my world to deal with the Crohns. My sympathy is with those with problems that make it hard to walk or move or lift things, those with debilitating headaches or neurological problems, those with back problems and those with vision problems. There are so many things that can go wrong with the human body. I feel like I got off easy, you know? I just have to spend a little time in the bathroom and spend a little time getting drugged up. No big deal. I just keep a book handy.

Edited to add- I really didn't mean to hijack your thread!
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