My Mom Hates Me

[Orpingtons4U]

Sometimes a parent and child might have too similar a personality even when neither one can see it. They will butt heads no matter what and it can be very hurtful and frustrating for both. Not sure if thats your case but sorta try to look at it impersonally and maybe you will find this to be the case. I only say this because I have experienced it and eventually realized it and just knowing why we butt heads made things better.

I would also encourage you to talk to someone that knows you both. Sometimes you just need someone not in the middle of it all to give you a fresh perspective.

Amen to that me and my mom we are the same which always leads to me screaming at the top of my lungs and me getting grounded

 

[nova022]

Don't blame yourself. Your mother is most likely unhappy about something else and lashing out at the closest person around. You can't control another person's actions you can only control how you repsond to them. If your mother is angry and yelling, you can respond in kind which will most likely make her more angry or you can simply pick up the trash in the most cheerful manner you can muster to defuse the situation.

 

[Poultry Couture]

Well, do you have a dad? Did they get divorced? This could be problems. My parents are divorced and my moms not nice at all... The whole time at her house She yells for no reason, blabs about how something is my fault, and curses. One time when I said I'm staying home and not coming to your house Today she went crazy... Next time I went over there she told me that she was going to tell everyone at work that shes going to pick up her "dog" ( she's talking about me ) instead of her daughter. She calls my dad nasty words and beats and yells at my step-dad I have two sisters and god knows what hell they go through. They're 9 and 4 yrs old!

 

[Linn Bee]

Precious ChickenFan, there are so many possible reasons for your mother's behavior and for your reaction and feelings toward that behavior. To list even a small part of them would take a long time. Seeking another trusted adult (such as a counselor) - as so many others suggested - is a really great idea.

Another piece of good advice is that you cannot change others, you can only change yourself and the way you respond to others. Determine to be the best you that you can be.

From the age of about 8 I had problems with my mother. I, too, spent most of my time in activities that took me away - mostly reading. Still, I showed respect to her, tried to get along, and never would have thought to sass her back.
I was determined not to parent the way my mother did and made a consistant effort to copy what I saw as good points in the mothers of my friends.

Also reading the book "Pollyanna" put my problems - real or perceived - in perspective. Even as a near-teen I considered myself lucky. I only had to live with my mother for another 7-10 years while she had to live with herself forever.

Know that you are in our hearts, thoughts, and prayers as you work through this stage in life.

Love you!

Smart Red

 

[Chickenfan4life]

Thank you all for your wonderfully kind words, and advice. Me and my mom have been getting along much better now, and things are going nicely between us. I am now going to request that this thread get locked, as there is no reason to continue discussing the topic. Once again, a very sincere thank you for taking the time to write some kind words of comfort and advice. I payed close attention to this thread, despite the fact that I never replied.

 

[Judy]

Closed at OP request.