My mum is very depressed and in hospital/stroke?

[bantymum]

Hi Friends.

Mum is in hospital as she has had really bad problems with her mind.
She is in "older persons mental health unit".
Totally ridiculous to think that only 18 years ago she was still modelling and had a lot of living to do.She's not even 70!

She had an operation for a twisted bowel 5 years ago and has never been the same since. I think she had some sort of stroke from the anaesthetic, though no one has ever tested her yet. Shes having tests on her brain on Monday.
Mum has changed so much, she has become very old very quick. Ive been in hospital too and I really miss her, has anyone else had this happen.
I just want my mum back to how she used to be.
I am now looking after her very loved dog "Mikey" who is also sad, I think he had been crying just now as I sat with him on my lounge and pat his little head and I saw tears in his eyes. He has been at mums house on his own with my brother and mum's neighbours popping in to feed him but he was lonely. I will cheer him up with lots of fun.
I wish i could do more for mum but she is so negative and down and its hard to get through to her.
Ill just keep praying for her to recover, i guess thats all I can do. I only have 1 brother who lives near mum.
She is only 1/2 an hour away.
Just had to tell someone.

 

[Maggie3]

I so sorry to hear about your Mom. My Mom will be 78 this year and was diagnosed with Parkinson's 10yrs ago. Then last Jan she had a stroke that affected her left side and she can no longer walk. It's very difficult for her and for us as her children to see her the way she is. She's always been a very active person and she hates the fact that she now has to rely on other people for everything and I mean everything. She cried the first time she had to ask me to help her use the restroom. I told her that she took care of me now it's my turn to help her.

I think what has helped me is to accept the fact that this is how she is and that this is part of my Mom's journey and that I'll be by her side while she takes that journey. It is extremely difficult she is now in a nursing home because she needs 24hr care, it's a very nice place but theirs no place like home.

What helps me get through it all is to put it in God's hands and have total faith that he will take care of her because you will find yourself wanting to fix her and for me I've accept that I can't do that but it's taken alot of day/nights crying to accept that.

I will pray for you and your Mother~

 

[bantymum]

all in all its been a crappy day, I also have a pet client who is a great dane size mastif dog, brindle and beautiful.
I have been petsitting him for 10 years. His owners are scuba instructors and spoil him well.
He had a lump in his sinus under his eye and on the side of his face, It went down with meds then reappeared, The vets tested it and its benign.
His eye is distorted now and the lump is like an orange, he looks really sad too. His owner said he will be euthanised soon. I felt that today may be the last time I see him, I went to feed him as they are away and when i saw him I just melted onto the step beside him and bawled my heart out.
He is such a magnificent looking dog, so powerful with huge paws and very frightening to look at but with such soft gentle eyes. He is like a lion.
To see him in this way is heart wrenching.
I hope tommorrow is a better day.
You all have a nice day.

 

[okiechick57]

:aww Aw girl...I know how you feel....my mom went through a major mind/body change when she lost my daddy after near 60 yrs.....so hard to watch...... I will be keeping her in my prayers as well as the family.....
Glad her doggie has you to love on him....poor thing....he misses her too..... hugs and love to you girl !

 

[Scrambled Egg]

 

[equine chick]

I'm sorry to hear about your mom bantymom. You have been having a bad time. The first thing to do is have your mom have a cat scan or mri(preferred) to see if it's anything like a stroke, bleed is causing her behavior. Why are they waiting til monday, should be done today. You can insist upon this. If this is something that you have steadily noticed then it might be dementia or alzheimers. If so then there are some great meds out there that can help that or slow down the progression of alzheimers.
Sometimes when older folk have traumatic medical problems such as having her bowel operated on it can cause their mind to act differently. My heart is with you, this is really hard. I recently went through this with my grandmother and eventhough I'm in the medical field and I knew what was going on, it still was really hard. feel free to pm me if you want. I'd be glad to help if I can.

 

[bantymum]

Thankyou for your quick kind thoughts before i finally go to bed.
Yes watching them helplessly is tough, I have some dear older lady friends who are still so active, they are 10 years older than mum at least. I guess the brain has a lot to do with it.
Mum has never struggled, she always had a great life, she was runner up Miss Australia in her youth and had a very priveliged? time cant spell, im too tired!! then her mum died,then my dad. and her world started to fall down around her.
Life is tough isnt it.

 

[bantymum]

Thankyou equine chick i will pm you tommorrow, i need some sleep now, goodnight all.

 

[Scrambled Egg]

Life is tough isnt it.

yep, that's why we need friends

 

[PurpleChicken]

That's a hard thing to deal with.

Your mom is blessed to have a daughter like you and, while it will be hard on you, I know
you will be there for her. There are no easy answers here. The only true help will
be LOVE.

When she gets negative just let the words flow away. Keep that image of her as a
younger happier woman in your head.